To use ‘Rose’ as middle name for my rainbow baby?

(230 Posts)
Qu33nSt3ph13 Wed 16-Jun-21 10:05:18

I lost my precious first born Ella-Rose October last year, now 22 weeks with our rainbow baby boy!

Would Rose work as his middle name? Please be nice, but don’t feel obliged to say yes just because of the situation :-)


OP’s posts: |
2beesornot2beesthatisthehoney Wed 16-Jun-21 10:07:01

I wouldn’t, too much baggage for the child and it’s a girls name. Sorry for your loss and congratulations on the new baby coming.

IndigoHexagon Wed 16-Jun-21 10:07:10

I wouldn’t personally, even as a middle name give a boy such an obvious girl name. I’d use a variation though - maybe Rosen / Rowan / Roe.

Congratulations on your rainbow x 🌈

Whinge Wed 16-Jun-21 10:07:22

Sorry to hear of your loss.

I know many people will say middle names don't matter, are never used etc. But no, I wouldn't give a boy the middle name Rose.

Alonelonelyloner Wed 16-Jun-21 10:08:13

Just no.

Congratulations on your pregnancy!

GiantToadstool Wed 16-Jun-21 10:08:21

So sorry for your loss.

I think no for 2 reasons.

1. No boy wants a girls name as a middle name.

2. While right now he is "your baby" and you see him in light of your previous baby, when he is born he needs to be himself in his own right. It is not fair to him to literally label him with links to your previous baby.

Newmum29 Wed 16-Jun-21 10:08:31

Sorry another vote for no


SquareTo Wed 16-Jun-21 10:08:49

I’m so sorry for your loss. Congratulations on your rainbow baby boy.

I totally understand the significance of Rose but I’m afraid I don’t think it works as a boy’s name, even as a middle name. What about something like Roscoe? It has all the letters of Rose in it but is definitely a boy’s name.

GreyhoundG1rl Wed 16-Jun-21 10:10:01


YellowFish12 Wed 16-Jun-21 10:12:11

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

TheIncredibleBookEatingManchot Wed 16-Jun-21 10:12:27

I'm very sorry for your loss flowers

Unfortunately I think your son would find having a girl's name- especially a pretty flower name- as a middle name embarrassing. Even knowing the reason for it.

As a pp said, maybe a boy's name that sounds similar to either Ella or Rose would work better. Then he could tell people his middle name and the reason for it without any embarrassment.

DeathByWalkies Wed 16-Jun-21 10:12:31

YABU - but only because he's a boy.

Other kids will find out, and other kids will be deeply unpleasant about it.

JaffaRaf Wed 16-Jun-21 10:12:50

My stillborn daughters middle name was Rose, and my rainbows middle name is Rose too (it’s sort of a family tradition for girls anyway though) but I would not do the same for a boy, it’s a girls name. As a pp suggested though something like Roe or Rowan could be lovely. Sorry about your DD and congratulations on your pregnancy smile

AnUnoriginalUsername Wed 16-Jun-21 10:12:55

I like it! 🤷‍♀️ you couldn't use a traditional boys name though, it would have to be something a bit strong and unique.

Rainbowqueeen Wed 16-Jun-21 10:15:11

Sorry no I don’t think it does work

Both your DC are wonderful and special. There is a wonderful special name out there for your little man.

Oly4 Wed 16-Jun-21 10:15:21

Please don’t mark your son with a name belonging to his dead sibling. It’s not fair

Mummytomylittlegirl Wed 16-Jun-21 10:15:21

Sorry I don’t think I would. Congratulations on your pregnancy. flowers How about Elliot?

funnyoldonion Wed 16-Jun-21 10:16:34

Bit of sensitivity in what you're saying wouldn't go a miss @YellowFish12

How about Ross or Ellis? Or perhaps you could save Rose if you had a little girl in the future

Cocomarine Wed 16-Jun-21 10:16:43

Congratulations on your pregnancy, and I’m sorry for your loss.

I wouldn’t though. Not the gendered name issue, but my belief that a name should belong to you and you alone - and no child should be expected to hear the commemoration of another child after their death.

You could consider deed poll to add your daughter’s name to your own?

But I wouldn’t personally do that. Ella-Rose still carries her own name, you don’t “need” it anywhere else flowers

bigbluebus Wed 16-Jun-21 10:16:44

Definitely not. Whilst I can understand your reason for wanting to do this,it is YOUR reason not your sons reason. He won't want to go through life being ridiculed and trying to explain why he has a girl's name. I'm sorry for your loss but please don't do this to your son.

Jengnr Wed 16-Jun-21 10:16:50

I wouldn’t. What about Elliot? Nice connection to his sister but a boy’s name and one he could make his own.

Toomanyradishes Wed 16-Jun-21 10:17:37

What about Briar, as in rose briars, so a connection but still unique to him and a bit more appropriate for a boy?

REP22 Wed 16-Jun-21 10:17:42

I am so sorry for the loss of your daughter. But I agree with others that it's not ideal for your son. How about Ross, or a similar-sounding male equivalent? On a personal note, I would not have liked to have been given the name of my deceased sibling, regardless of gender specifics.

I sincerely wish you and your boy all the very best.

littleredberries Wed 16-Jun-21 10:18:19

I'm feeling the opposite as some of the other posters. I think this is a really lovely idea.
My mother had a pregnancy before me (I'm first born) which I knew nothing about until I was twenty. I wish I had known because I came to realise it had impacted my life a lot. The silence made it worse.
I would have loved sharing a middle name with this sister that never was. Bringing into the light and being more positive about it, rather than calling it "baggage", I think is a great idea. But it's up to you OP. daffodilbiscuit

BarbarianMum Wed 16-Jun-21 10:18:41

Please dont do anything that might in future make your son feel like he's a replacement or a consolation prize for your precious daughter (I know he's not but young people can pick up these negative feelings as they grow up).
Being a rainbow baby can be quite difficult emotionally. Give him his own name.

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