Upsetting encounter with mentally ill man, he spat on me

[Ldnmum276]

I've just had an upsetting encounter with a local well known character in the town centre. He has mental ill health and substance abuse issues.

The reception you get when you pass him varies depending on how he is on any given day, he's either chirpy and saying hello to everybody / stopping traffic so women with prams can cross the road.. or behaving aggressively to passers by.

I've just been for my daily cycle and stopped at a shop for a drink. When I came out to unlock my bicycle he approached me shouting and got right into my personal space, because he was so close to me he actually spat directly into my eye.

I'm not sure that the spit was intentional (though he was being deliberately aggressive) but that would be no comfort to me if he gave me covid or god knows what else.

I'm a small woman with a very obvious pregnant bump and must have looked terrified but people (men!) just glanced and walked on by.

I managed to get on my bicycle and make a hasty exit when he turned his attention to another person walking past.

I'm home now and my eye feels a bit sore but that could be because I've rubbed it that much

Not an AIBU as such but I'm feeling a bit shaken up and wanted to get it out somewhere.

Nothing can be done really can it?

I'm going to be on edge whenever I see him now which is fairly often. He's never targeted me before today, infact I've actually bought him food a few times as harmless as I thought he was.

[Ldnmum276]

I forgot to say, I'm a regular poster but name changed to post this.

[VettiyaIruken]

I'm sorry you experienced that. Mental health support is a bloody joke but you could report it, hoping he'd get some sort of welfare check or something.

[RickJames]

Oh that sounds frightening, sorry that happened to you. I would contact local police on the non emergency line. It's not about punishing him, he could be having a break with reality or something and need help. Also he could do something worse. Maybe the shops have CCTV? If he's this unwell I think he needs reporting to get help and stop being so aggressive.

Wash your eye gently, if it's still sore tomorrow then go to GP - spit can have illnesses in it.

[Sonofagun]

Poor you. I can understand how upsetting that was but I guess you just need to put it behind you. Something similar happened to me years ago when I was a student. Minding my own business when a homeless man appeared out of nowhere and kicked me (full on karate style kick) and chased me down the street shouting and spitting at me. It sounds quite comical now but at the time I was very very upset. People around did nothing. Totally unprovoked attack. Dust yourself off and try to avoid for the time being.

[baldafrique]

Its a nasty assault so you should really report it to the police

[threeteenstaximum]

You should ring 101 (if U.K.) and report to the police.
He verbally abused you and spat in you. There is likely to be CCTV that they can look at.

It sounds that his mental health is deteriorating if he's behaving aggressively to random strangers, such that the police can pick him up and arrange for support for him. It's hard to get support in the community for people going through mental health crises but this might be enough to get him some support before he behaves even more erratically.

Sad to hear how he frightened you, you did nothing wrong.

[Ldnmum276]

He's definitely having a mental health crisis because he was ranting about JFK, shootings and people being liars.

He seems to cycle quite often as it was only last week he came over in a good mood saying hello to the kids and DH. He seemed totally fine then.

spit can have illnesses in it

That's what I'm most worried about. I've not long recovered from a nasty virus which wiped me out for a fortnight (not covid thankfully) and my immune system is quite crap at the minute. My baby is at an increased risk of HDN due to ANTI-E and my titre levels so I'm quite worried about that too.

I don't want to sound cruel, but he could have anything if he's an intravenous drug user which I'm pretty sure he is.

Hope people don't think I'm being dramatic. In usual times I wouldn't worry this much.

Sonofagun I'm so sorry that happened to you, that sounds terrifying. It pisses me off that people just watch on and do nothing. I wouldn't expect anybody to manhandle them but Christ, if you're a man and you see a woman in danger the least you could do is ask if she needs help and tell the aggressor to move along.

[stalachtiteorstalagmite]

The same thing happened to me once - as I passed two teenage boys crossing the road one of them spat in my face, then they cycled off laughing. Loads of people saw and no one stopped to help me. I think that was the worst thing about it.

I am so sorry this has happened to you too, particularly as you are pregnant. I would report it to the police if I were you. It is not acceptable for someone to do that without any repercussions. I didn't report it and I have always regretted it.

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

Well you can't spit in someone's eye unintentionally.
He obviously needs monitoring and suppport.
Yes its sad that he has his issues. However I don't think its right nor fair that the general public are treading on egg shells around him.

[RoseRedRoseBlue]

You need to report this via 101

[threeteenstaximum]

@Ldnmum276

He's definitely having a mental health crisis because he was ranting about JFK, shootings and people being liars.

He seems to cycle quite often as it was only last week he came over in a good mood saying hello to the kids and DH. He seemed totally fine then.

spit can have illnesses in it

That's what I'm most worried about. I've not long recovered from a nasty virus which wiped me out for a fortnight (not covid thankfully) and my immune system is quite crap at the minute. My baby is at an increased risk of HDN due to ANTI-E and my titre levels so I'm quite worried about that too.

I don't want to sound cruel, but he could have anything if he's an intravenous drug user which I'm pretty sure he is.

Hope people don't think I'm being dramatic. In usual times I wouldn't worry this much.

Sonofagun I'm so sorry that happened to you, that sounds terrifying. It pisses me off that people just watch on and do nothing. I wouldn't expect anybody to manhandle them but Christ, if you're a man and you see a woman in danger the least you could do is ask if she needs help and tell the aggressor to move along.

Seriously please report it to 101 police.

It's very hard to get auppprt for people with chronic mental health problems when they are in crisis, but a report of an assault - just tell police he spat in you and was shouting aggressively at you include what he said- and they have a duty to pick him up, then can use s136 if he is still out, to take him to a place of safety and get him assessed by the mental health team or even an AMPH. The police are likely to decide not to prosecute if he is unwell and taken in somewhere at the time, it's a good chance to get him support he clearly needs

[Thisisworsethananticpated]

You have to put it down to experience
I remember when a man hit me once , just random walking by

However when PG is more upsetting

[TokyoSushi]

That sounds horrible, agree that I would report via 101

[RoseRedRoseBlue]

@Thisisworsethananticpated why does it have to be “put down to experience”? She has been assaulted and intimidated.

[UhtredRagnarson]

Please report it OP and I would calm your GP tomorrow and ask if you need to be checked for anything.

[UhtredRagnarson]

*call

[MichelleScarn]

Id agree with calling 101, transmission of infections via spit is low but absolutely understand you should speak to midwife/gp for reassurance. Sorry you had this happen.

[Ldnmum276]

Thank you ladies, I think I will call 101. He's well known to the police they know who he is and where he lives. He definitely needs to be monitored atm.

Well you can't spit in someone's eye unintentionally

I might not have explained it very well, but he didn't purposely spit at me, it happened as a result of him ranting and raving right in my face.

stalachtiteorstalagmite the dirty little twats, I'm sorry that happened to you. Absolutely disgusting

[MichelleScarn]

@Thisisworsethananticpated

You have to put it down to experience
I remember when a man hit me once , just random walking by

However when PG is more upsetting

What 'experience' should she have to put this down to?!

[youvegottenminuteslynn]

@threeteenstaximum

You should ring 101 (if U.K.) and report to the police.
He verbally abused you and spat in you. There is likely to be CCTV that they can look at.

It sounds that his mental health is deteriorating if he's behaving aggressively to random strangers, such that the police can pick him up and arrange for support for him. It's hard to get support in the community for people going through mental health crises but this might be enough to get him some support before he behaves even more erratically.

Sad to hear how he frightened you, you did nothing wrong.

All of this.

You poor thing.

I have the rage on your behalf that people walk past and don't help, especially when the victim is a pregnant woman. Awful.

Really hope you're ok, you'll be in shock a bit today so try to keep calm and have something to eat, stuff like this shakes us up more than we like to admit sometimes.

[Wavypurple]

You say that he’s known to have substance issues and he spat on you, I’d call the GP.

[Januaryissodull]

How horrible for you. It must have been very intimidating.

I'm pretty sure I'd be inclined to report this to the police. It's possible that his behaviour could escalate even further and being shouted at in the street really shouldn't just be accepted.

I'm sure that everything will be fine but if you're worried because of him spitting at you speak to your midwife.

[Thisisworsethananticpated]

+What 'experience' should she have to put this down to?!*

Life experience
Shit happens
What do you suggest ?
Report ? Waste her time reporting a man for basically nothing to happen
Do enlighten me

[youvegottenminuteslynn]

@Thisisworsethananticpated

You have to put it down to experience
I remember when a man hit me once , just random walking by

However when PG is more upsetting

What the fuck?!

[skirk64]

You need to report it to the police. People have been prosecuted for coughing at people during the pandemic and spitting in your eye is much more serious. He needs taking off the street, either to a secure medical facility or preferably just a prison.

I'm not sure what you expect passers-by to do though, it's not worth getting involved especially if the situation involves a known problem case. If an altercation involves homeless/street drinkers/substance abusers then it's even more important not to get involved because they are so volatile. There was a case a while back where a homeless person was having a go at some woman, I just walked by because there is a reasonable chance she was homeless and drunk too.