To be terrified at the thought of all this dental work?

[cakebythepound1234]

I'm getting Invisalign soon, and before
I can start this treatment I need to ensure my teeth are in tiptop health. So today I went to my new dentist and he showed me the work that needs doing to my teeth. My last appt was 2 years ago where I had a filling. I know I should have had regular appointments but with COVID and moving countries it got put pretty low down the list of my priorities. Now I've got to have several fillings, and my wisdom teeth are looking like they are causing problems so may have to be removed. I'm feeling pretty embarrassed about needing a few fillings all in one go, and upset about the wisdom
Teeth possibly needing removal. I really fucking hate going to the dentist and am anxious about having to spend so much time in the dentists chair sorting these fillings out. My husband had his wisdom teeth removed a few years ago so
I'm aware it's a painful and unpleasant experience. I do have anxiety which I can generally manage but the thought of all this dental work is making me feel really upset and quite scared at the thought of it all. My husband tried to reassure me that it was just a case of 2 years worth of dentistry crammed into a short space of time, but I still feel pretty shit about it all.

Bizarrely I'm not bothered about the brace at all, but the embarrassment and anxiety around the fillings and wisdom teeth is quite overwhelming. Am I over reacting or is this quite normal? Any similar stories or reassurance would be welcome too!

Side note: On my way out of the building following my appointment I walked head first into a glass door, which just added to my embarrassment!

[HollowTalk]

Perhaps you should feel reassured that they're helping you? The work is obviously necessary and if they just ignored it you'd be a lot worse off.

[Wafflepup]

I dont know if it is normal but I totally understand. After pregnancy my teeth just crumbled. I went 33 years with no fillings at all and then had to get 6 at once. I was mortified. Just felt so embarrassed and upset at all the work I needed done. I was so proud of my teeth previously.

My dentist offers sedation for treatments. It cost a bit extra but it took all the stress out of it for me. Might be worth considering to help with anxiety and pain?

[Hughbert]

If it helps, I haven't been to the dentist since 1992, so I think you are doing brilliantly! I'm sure it will all be fine and completely worth it.

[cakebythepound1234]

@HollowTalk I know, it's definitely better than several root canals. Much as I'm anxious about it I will be getting it done despite my initial reaction to bury my head in the sand. And I'm never missing a 6 month check up again!

[cakebythepound1234]

Thanks @Wafflepup . Glad to know I'm not the only one! My new dentist is quite young and very attractive too so that didn't help my feelings of mortification!

@Hughbert thank you. Since 1992?! Well I feel better about my 2 year break from the dentist now!!

[TinyRobins]

Hi op, I’m currently 2 years into orthodontic work. I was also terrified of the dentist but after two pregnancies my teeth all shifted and were horrifically overcrowded. I need 2 huge fillings, (more filling than tooth left) and 2 extractions before getting braces. It was actually all completely painless, the braces have been another story… but i only have a few months of treatment left and I'm very pleased I went ahead. Good luck 😊

[saltinesandcoffeecups]

I think this one of those times in life, where you need to give yourself permission to be embarrassed (not that I think you should be) and anxious (perfectly normal in the circumstances) but to just get on with it. You have a goal, which is straight teeth, and these are the steps you need to take to get there.

More importantly they are the steps to have a healthy mouth, now and in the future.

[cakebythepound1234]

@saltinesandcoffeecups Thank you - I'm definitely just going to have to grit my teeth (or not!) and just get on with it. In 18 months or so time once everything's fixed and my teeth are straight I'll know it will have been worth it. It's also a harsh lesson in keeping up to date with dentist appointments and not leaving it so long next time. I have some anti anxiety meds that are just for times when I'm in need of quick relief from overwhelming anxiety so if it gets too stressful hopefully those will help in the short term.

[cakebythepound1234]

@TinyRobins Thanks, good luck to you too with your dental work!

[Noway100]

As it's a new dentist, I would be suspicious about being told you suddenly need multiple fillings after an absence of only 2 years. It might be best to get a second opinion. If you feel terrified after a private consultation, maybe they are not the dentist for you.

[Noway100]

They are young? Are they inexperienced? You are paying for this.

[Hankunamatata]

All my back teeth are filled. Poor genetics and not being careful cleaning when I was younger

[TinyRobins]

@Noway100

As it's a new dentist, I would be suspicious about being told you suddenly need multiple fillings after an absence of only 2 years. It might be best to get a second opinion. If you feel terrified after a private consultation, maybe they are not the dentist for you.

Agree with this, I went to a private clinic first and was told I had severe gum disease and would need cleaning appointments done first at 80 quid each over 3 appointments!, the dentist seemed more like a salesman. I didn’t go back and asked my nhs dentist for a referral to the nhs orthodontist as a private patient. Completely different experience, I didn’t have gum disease at all btw, I had a bit of recession from overcrowding and spotless teeth, they comment on my clean teeth at every appointment lol. Although I do also sit in the waiting room with teenagers at every appointment 😂

[Northofsomewhere]

I'm also really anxious about the dentist and went again this year for the first time in about 5 years, seemingly my last NHS dentist left a note on my record recommending 3/4 teeth be extracted (he never told me) however neither the NHS dentist thought this was the case or the private dentist I'm currently under (wanted a second opinion on treatment and decided on private). The one thing that has helped my anxiety is a friend saying that you have to eat and everything you eat has to go through your mouth, to an extent damage and decay is normal, all you can do is take your best care of your teeth as possible.

I'm currently getting a lot of treatment done including 2 new fillings and the replacement of all my older dark amalgam fillings for white ones. Like you, it's going to take some time and cost some money but it's going to be worth it in the long run. I'm trying to normalise my relationship with the dentist by visiting regularly but I still need diazapam for treatment or the anxiety is overwhelming. I was only able to get diazapam on private treatment (despite previously having it on NHS treatment), this and their better understanding and approach towards dental anxiety is what made me chose them. If you're at all concerned about the treatment plan definitely get a second opinion that way you have a choice at least.

[Angrymum22]

I’m a very old experienced dentist and young dentists are a nightmare. They are super keen to achieve a perfect mouth for each and every patient and will often replace fillings unnecessarily through lack of experience. Your previous dentist may well have been “watching” these fillings for years. And just being old is not justification for replacement.

1. Ask for a full explanation why they need replacement. If it’s just because they are old then ask why they need replacing if it’s just age.
   
2. If you haven’t had xrays or they can’t be demonstrated on xrays walk away.
   

If he can demonstrate decay or an imminent failure then go ahead. If he can’t then you should be given the option to have no treatment.
My patients know they can ask for a full explanation and that they can choose to do nothing once they know all their options. It is then documented fully.

[Noway100]

I realise you probably posted for reassurance and several posters provided that but suddenly needing a lot of fillings rings alarm bells and I want you to realise, as a 'dentally terrified person' that going private gives you control and options right down to who treats you and what they do.
How did you choose this practice? The whole point of having a private dentist as opposed to an NHS one, is that you choose the particular individual dentist and their experience/skill level rather than take whomever you are given.
I would suggest you check their entry on the GDC Register to see their year of qualification.
Is it a Corporate Dental chain? If so, i would definitely get a second opinion elsewhere as many of them have production(=sales) targets to meet.
You need to go to an experienced dentist with an established good reputation preferably a practice owner, and build a relationship of trust as that is the only effective cure for dental fear long term.
I think any General Dentist with a bit of extra training can offer invisalign and it might be best to see what an orthodontist recommends with regard to teeth straightening.
The guidelines on removal of wisdom teeth are mega conservative in the NHS these days (maybe too conservative) so again another alarm bell.

I think it is a good idea to only let a new dentist work on one tooth at a time. If he replaces multiple fillings in one sitting and they go wrong, you will have a massive issue which could have been avoided by a more cautious approach.
Good luck.

[WhipperSnapperSteve]

I totally get the anxiety and embarrassment. Due to a medical condition I lost all my teeth by 35 and now wear full dentures in my early 40s. I was so embarrassed and anxious every time I had to go out shopping, socialising and the dentist but it settled down over a year and you honestly cannot tell I have the dentures.

Invisalign is fabulous, it's well worth persevering. I promise you that you'll be delighted once it's all done. If you need something to calm you down for the procedures ask your GP for some diazepam. With the removals ask the dentist to use articaine instead of lidocaine - it's far, far, stronger.

[WhipperSnapperSteve]

You can also ask for a referral to the Community Dentist. They offer midazolam (decent sedation - I had five teeth out under it and was away with the fairies and have no memory of the extractions), they can also offer a general anaesthetic.

[cakebythepound1234]

Thanks all for your advice. During my appt the dentist did have a camera stick thing which he used to show me my teeth in real time which was super embarrassing but they definitely need doing. One of my old fillings has also chipped and taken a little bit of my tooth with it which I also wasn't aware of and it looks in dire need of help. He has a lot of positive reviews on google and is a member of the American orthodontist association or something along those lines, as well as graduating from a prestigious uni in Mexico (where we are living at the moment) and training in the US also. So I'm not concerned about his qualifications, but the comment made by a PP about a younger dentist wanting teeth to be perfect is probably apt. However, the cost of private treatment here is almost identical to the cost of nhs treatment back home, so it feels like a no brainer to get it done now. Someone said I shouldn't have been made to feel terrified by him - to be fair to him he was very kind and patient, he wasnt terrifying at all, I just generally find having dentists poke around my mouth quite upsetting regardless of how nice they are. But I will bring up just how necessary all of the work is with him and see how we get on.

I had to have my x rays, photos and mould taken today for the Invisalign - it was fucking horrible as I hate showing my teeth to people and obviously this involves a lot of flashing the teeth and poking around my mouth. But I did it even though my stomach was doing somersaults all morning before the appointment. I know it will all be worth it in the long run and I don't want to bury my head in the sand purely because of an irrational fear of the dentist and my anxiety.