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AIBU?

Friend gave us a higher quote for the job

121 replies

ZizzyK · 14/05/2021 03:49

We are looking to do some work in our office space. We were planning to use a close friend and neighbour for the work, however the quote they provided is much higher than what we were quoted by other people. We are now not sure whether to give the friend the work.

AIBU for considering giving the job to someone else?

What would you do in a situation like this

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

1032 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
3%
You are NOT being unreasonable
97%
Finfintytint · 14/05/2021 03:51

If the quote is much higher than going rates, then they don’t want the job. Take that as an indication and find someone else.

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Newcastleteacake · 14/05/2021 03:54

It's never a good idea to mix business with friendships or family.

It's a sure fire way to end the relationship.

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pasturesgreen · 14/05/2021 04:11

No brainer: you give the work to someone else (also much better for the sake of your friendship in the long run).

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BlueVelvetStars · 14/05/2021 04:14

@pasturesgreen

No brainer: you give the work to someone else (also much better for the sake of your friendship in the long run).

OOft I agree, it never works out well. Flowers
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FlamingHot · 14/05/2021 04:27

This happened to me last year. I gave the job to someone else. It was a bit embarrassing but in honesty I was pretty disappointed in the friend for giving me such a high quote (and it was high, I had another quote and also asked another friend who works in the trade what he thought).

We haven't mentioned it since and things are as they always were with the friend.

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gumball37 · 14/05/2021 04:35

Friend quoted twice as much for a roof replacement. I went with the other guy. No complaints. I have bills to pay and I'm not going to pay extra I don't have to just because my friend also does work in that area.

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TangoWhiskyAlphaTango · 14/05/2021 05:32

@Newcastleteacake

It's never a good idea to mix business with friendships or family.

It's a sure fire way to end the relationship.

THIS! My Dbro is a plumber and was pleaded with to do some work for my Aunt (my Mums sister) as she had been let down at the last minute. DBro will not mix business with family but did the work as a favour as our Mum as she asked. This was 4 years ago and the entire family fell out over it, Aunt thought Db ripped her off with his charge (he fitted a boiler at cost price). Literally 60 odd years of being sisters, cousins that have spent a lifetime being close all fell out over a fucking boiler. Do not mix the two.
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Billandben444 · 14/05/2021 05:35

It may be he's quoting high because he doesn't need/want the job but I'd treat it professionally and just say thanks for the quote but you're going with a lower one.

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user1468105798 · 14/05/2021 05:37

Maybe rethink that friendship? I had work done on our roof this week and got a £200 discount because I used to date the roofers best mate 25 years ago!! Hadn't set eyes on the roofer since then lol

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grapewine · 14/05/2021 05:43

They don't want the job, is what I would take from that. Go with the other one.

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picturesandpickles · 14/05/2021 05:44

@Newcastleteacake

It's never a good idea to mix business with friendships or family.

It's a sure fire way to end the relationship.

I agree with this. We once used a friend, the work wasn't really what we had requested, felt unable to say anything. No falling out but I wouldn't do it again.
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HarebrightCedarmoon · 14/05/2021 05:46

Look at the relative experience of doing the work too. Cheapest isn't always best.

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Penners99 · 14/05/2021 06:06

When I don’t want a job, but feel obligated to quote, I alway add 75% to the price.

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Kazzyhoward · 14/05/2021 06:29

You shouldn't have asked them to quote in the first place. Don't mix friends/family with business.

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Subordinateclause · 14/05/2021 06:36

@FlamingHot

This happened to me last year. I gave the job to someone else. It was a bit embarrassing but in honesty I was pretty disappointed in the friend for giving me such a high quote (and it was high, I had another quote and also asked another friend who works in the trade what he thought).

We haven't mentioned it since and things are as they always were with the friend.

Why? That's their going rate and they can afford to charge it. If they're working for you then they're not working for someone else, so you're essentially asking them to work for a lower salary for x amount of time. Would you do that in your job? My husband's business charges more than many and also often has people come back to him after initially rejecting his quote to have him fix the mess cheaper tradespeople have made.

OP go with the quote you think is right but tell your friend. It's no big deal but the courteous thing to do.
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DonLewis · 14/05/2021 06:39

It may be deliberately high do you don't go with the quote. Like the others have said, mixing friendships and business like this can be awkward and lead to fall outs.

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FortunesFave · 14/05/2021 06:48

How long have they been in business? if they're new, they would appreciate some guidance. You could tell them what the others quoted. If they are much higher then they can't be getting a lot of work!

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pilates · 14/05/2021 06:55

What is the quality of work like?

I would rather pay more for a good job.

Word of mouth recommendation is advisable and going to see work they have done.

I believe the cost of materials has increased.

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ThumbWitchesAbroad · 14/05/2021 07:01

I would go with the other person who quoted a lower rate, if you can be sure that their work quality is as good.

Your friend may have over-quoted because they don't want to do work for a friend, or they may just be overpriced.

Either way, no good reason to pay more for the job than you have to, if the end result is the same.

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stayathomer · 14/05/2021 07:06

Look at it impartially. Is their quote like that because they're better quality? If you didn't know them would you actively seek them out based on what you know about them? I'd agree in most cases do not work with someone you know, any issues and there'll be hard feelings in the future but saying that if they're a proper professional outfit then maybe

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starfishmummy · 14/05/2021 07:06

Is thenkther quote from someone reputable? Have theybquoted for exactly the same thing and included all charges? If so then I'd go with them.

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SempreSuiGeneris · 14/05/2021 07:09

Go with the cheaper quote unless your friend is quoting on the basis of providing a much higher standard and that is what you actually want. In terms of not causing offence I would just say that you weren't looking to invest so much in the work and they are above your affordable budget.

I would assume they know the going rate and either actually are at the high spec end or they deliberately priced themselves out of the running because they are too busy or don't want to mix business and friendship.

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Summerfun54321 · 14/05/2021 07:15

If they’re a friend, I would tell them exactly what you’ve said here and say the other quotes are higher. Give your friend a chance to explain why and be totally transparent. You might not piss them off if you don’t use them, but you definitely risk pissing them off if they’ve gone to the effort of quoting and you haven’t engaged in any negotiations with them or even asked any questions. Are the quotes definitely like for like? Or has your friend factored in the cost of something that others haven’t? You should ask your friend that at least.

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dizzyupthegirl86 · 14/05/2021 07:20

Have they asked for feedback? I’d be of the opinion that if they WANT the job, they’d ask for feedback and then you can be honest and say you had a much lower price. If they’ve not asked, then I’d agree with others that they don’t want it. Mad how they couldn’t just say ‘oh, I’m too busy to do it until august 2027’ or something if that was the case!
From their point of view, they might have felt obligated to quote as you’re a friend and they are hoping that if they don’t say anything, you never bring it up either!

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ThumbWitchesAbroad · 14/05/2021 07:21

@Summerfun54321

If they’re a friend, I would tell them exactly what you’ve said here and say the other quotes are higher. Give your friend a chance to explain why and be totally transparent. You might not piss them off if you don’t use them, but you definitely risk pissing them off if they’ve gone to the effort of quoting and you haven’t engaged in any negotiations with them or even asked any questions. Are the quotes definitely like for like? Or has your friend factored in the cost of something that others haven’t? You should ask your friend that at least.

I actually wouldn't do this, in case the friend thinks you're trying to beat their price down on the basis of your friendship.

One of the hardest things about having a trade is that some people think they should get a discount just for knowing you, and while some tradies are able to accommodate that, a lot aren't and it creates bad feeling (see above!)

So unless the friend asks why you're going with someone else, and volunteers the info as to why their quote is much higher, I really wouldn't tell them - just go with the other person (again, if the quality of work is on par)
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