Bear with me, as this may get a bit longwinded. Brother met a woman at work just before covid. She moved back up north. They kept in touch and he left a good job to live with her. I went up to stay with them in the summer. he seemed really nice and they appear to be a happy little family. Over a few drinks, she told me her history. She had had a relationship with an older married man who left his wife for her but his wife was a nightmare and he was mentally abusive and they ended up splitting up but stayed friends. I wasn't too impressed as my husband had left me for another woman but I let it go. Fast forward to this week. The married man has died from covid and she has put a big status on fb with a photo of them together about how she misses him and how special he was. This seems a bit odd to say the least. I spoke to my brother and he was a bit annoyed but he doesn't like confrontation and won't say anything to her. I now work where my brother worked (the main employer in our town). It seems her story is not quite as she said. They all refer to her as the Bunny boiler. She did have an affair with one of the managers. However, she would not leave him alone and would follow him everywhere he went. She tried to stop him from seeing his kids and used to ring his ex-wife when she was drunk. She then had an affair with another married man after that and he ended up leaving the company and moved away because she wouldn't leave him alone when they finished. People said no one wanted to work with her because she was so difficult to work with and caused arguments. My issue is not really that she had these affairs(always 2 sides) but that she is not honest with my brother. He gave up a great job and is now reliant on her completely. It is all her family, her friends. He has only managed to get the odd casual bit of work and relies on her financially. He has only been to see his son once in over a year, saying he has no money (I offered to give him the money but he refused). If this was a girl in this relationship I would be concerned that it was quite controlling. He doesn't appear unhappy but I just don't have a good feeling. The fb post was a red flag for me. Am I being foolish? or should I take more notice of my gut?
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