To ask if you personally judge people who dress alternatively?

(445 Posts)
getyourfreakon Wed 05-May-21 22:58:53

As per the thread title.
Yes, Coronation Street has highlighted the issue. I'm what would be referred to as a "goth". I'm also a mother of one.
What are your feelings on the subject?

OP’s posts: |
Wolfiefan Wed 05-May-21 23:00:02

Your clothes? Your business!
I judge people on how they act and what they say. (Don’t watch Corrie so can’t comment on that!!)

LawnFever Wed 05-May-21 23:01:45

Not at all, people can wear what they like, have their hair & makeup how they like, up to the individual.

bluebluezoo Wed 05-May-21 23:01:46

Nope.

I prefer to see “alternative” dress and self expression than all the tanned, hd eyebrowed, heavily contoured and drag queen lips on girls these days.

I like interesting

Wearywithteens Wed 05-May-21 23:02:45

I wouldn’t judge them - I try and befriend them as all the adult ‘goths’ I’ve met have difficult backstories and have big insecurities. They need tlc.

NoNever Wed 05-May-21 23:06:05

Depends what you mean by judge? People express themselves via their clothing, so I expect people want to be judged by what they wear. Otherwise they would wear something different. Judging isn’t a negative.

HeyGirlHeyBoy Wed 05-May-21 23:06:16

Couldn't care less what anyone else wears, only interested in the person smile

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Countbinface Wed 05-May-21 23:06:33

Nope - I spent my youth in Camden market thought - so everything was normal 😂

CupoTeap Wed 05-May-21 23:07:09

Not at all, evil likes to hide in 'normal'

Caplin Wed 05-May-21 23:07:57

Meh, I don’t care. Not sure why this is still a thing.

I’m a senior manager and had pink/purple hair for a couple of years in my 40s. Only stopped because my hair was frazzled!

Hotankles Wed 05-May-21 23:08:02

bluebluezoo

Nope.

I prefer to see “alternative” dress and self expression than all the tanned, hd eyebrowed, heavily contoured and drag queen lips on girls these days.

I like interesting

Yes. I had a alternative dd1. At her prom she wore a black dress from All saints which make her look like Morticia ( she looked spectacular) all her friends had massive ball girlie gowns on. She’s 25 now and has fantastic fashion sense.

I love interesting and edgy!

whyhell0there Wed 05-May-21 23:08:15

No. I used to dress in an "alternative" way myself!

Also, it's been years since I heard the term "goth"!! Haven't seen any coming out the local secondary school either!

Craftycorvid Wed 05-May-21 23:08:36

I love seeing people really owning their style. Also, most goths I’ve met are really lovely folk.

Imissmoominmama Wed 05-May-21 23:10:39

No judgment here!

x2boys Wed 05-May-21 23:11:36

No i used to dress alternatively ,I don't watch current Corrie
But I believe they have based the storyline on the young Goth couple that got attacked in Bacup a few years ago ,and she subsequently died from her injuries ,awful .

Selkiesarereal Wed 05-May-21 23:13:22

I love looking at people’s various styles especially those who dress alternatively, makes things far more interesting even though I dress quite boringly!

SpongeCakeAddict Wed 05-May-21 23:16:22

Happily a long-term alternative here, I tried removing the goth, but once it's a part of you, it never leaves...

Have had all sorts of treatment because of the way I've dressed, over the years. Including assaults. It's quite bad, my friend's and I have been physically assaulted for looking different, verbally assaulted, strangers seem to think it's OK to come up to us and grab our hair (extensions and braids), or pull at piercings (old lady on the bus, she wanted to know if it was real!). And I've been sexually assaulted by men and women who have assumed the way I dress is provoking or inviting, and done for their gratification rather than because it's how I've liked to dress.

These days I've worked out my own personal style taking into consideration the styles I like from the alt scene, and what is most comfortable and appropriate for my needs (wheelchair user, some outfits are impractical and uncomfortable). I'm very obviously alternative but also while wearing pretty average clothing.

I won't wear anything hugely interesting unless I'm with reinforcements.

PermanentTemporary Wed 05-May-21 23:17:22

Judge... I suppose if I'm really honest I probably do, in that I associate certain types of clothing with other things. But wouldn't they want me to do that? I don't think 'there's a goth they're useless' because I'm aware that the gormless subcultures of my youth were gormless because we were kids, not because there's anything intrinsically dumb about wearing black nail varnish and liking studded collars or Dracula.

Cocomarine Wed 05-May-21 23:22:42

No idea what the Corrie reference is.

Don’t care what anyone else wears - at least, not in a judgemental way, I do like to enjoy looking!

I suppose the only judgement I make about goth specifically is that I don’t really find it “alternative”, but pretty common! I remember being a goth teen 35 years ago thinking I was really individual - buying my goth clothes from the same goth shop that everyone else in my one goth shop town did 🙂

askingrandomsonlinemighthelp Wed 05-May-21 23:22:44

Everyone judges everyone. You want to make a certain impression, or you wouldn't do it. Around my way, you get a lot of hippies who don't wear shoes and have dreads and baggy shat-yourself pants and noserings. If you're 17 and being alternative, great. But, I'm just past all that. It's just another uniform. Same as someone who wears designer gear. It's all to try-hard. I just know to avoid people who go too far down any route because I know I wouldn't get on with them. I used to sing in a rock band and the edgy look was important,but then I realised I was surrounded by bellends. Now I stop in with my cats. I'm presentable. Jeans and a top. Job done.

Joolsin Wed 05-May-21 23:23:06

I was a teenage goth way back when. I lost my way to mumsiness a bit in my 30s, then got my DMs back down out of the attic in my 40s and haven't looked back. I do judge people who dress alternatively - I judge them positively. They will usually have an interesting take on things, won't be trying to keep up with the Joneses and will be people I'd like to get to know.

PompomDahlia Wed 05-May-21 23:23:49

I wouldn't judge them as in thinking they're bad people or anything. I used to be in a crowd that was very alternative at school, and we used to be quite judgemental about 'mainstream/popular' kids and thought they were boring and a bit dim for dressing unimaginatively. Even though with hindsight my group were all probably a bit of a cliche in trying very hard to be alternative! And I think we were quite insecure and felt a bit rejected by the 'mainstream' kids. Now I'm much more easygoing about clothes and I mostly like to be practical, comfortable and smart. I do sometimes roll my eyes a bit at people who talk a lot about being individuals but then dress in a cliched way

AgeLikeWine Wed 05-May-21 23:26:18

I can’t honestly say I understand why some people choose dress as stereotypical goths, hipsters etc. Clearly, they wish to visibly identify with a tribe, but to me it just looks like the opposite of genuine individuality. I’m sure they couldn’t care less what I think, though.

Why would they?

minniemomo Wed 05-May-21 23:29:08

Who cares? I have black nails currently and was sported a dark purple dress and black tights earlier, I just like black!

BackforGood Wed 05-May-21 23:38:00

Depends what you mean by judge? People express themselves via their clothing, so I expect people want to be judged by what they wear. Otherwise they would wear something different. Judging isn’t a negative.

This ^ and

Everyone judges everyone. You want to make a certain impression, or you wouldn't do it.

This ^

I don't know what the Corrie reference is, but we all make judgements when we see anyone. 'Judging' is 'making an assessment of', not criticising or being negative.
Someone said upthread they would "prefer to see “alternative” dress and self expression than all the tanned, hd eyebrowed, heavily contoured and drag queen lips on girls these days." - but surely that is a judgement on the orange faced / over eye-browed clan ?

People who dress to stand out from the crowd know they will attract looks and that people will notice them and often comment, and they have still made a choice to do so. That's great, and takes a lot of self-confidence, which I admire.
But we all make assessments about people to some extent due to the way they present themselves, and that isn't a bad thing unless you choose to make it into some sort of a barrier.

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