Who pays?

(328 Posts)
Imfinallyhappy1 Sun 18-Apr-21 14:01:36

Have had my niece (11) for a day at the park. We parked and as it was crowded said to my ds and dn be careful opening car doors please.

Dn and ds acknowledged and then dn Flung open her door and has hit a gorgeous merc beside us.

We were all wtf and she said sorry I didn't think.

There was approx 5 seconds between the warning and her opening the door.

I've left a note for the car owner and taken pictures.

Dn lives with my dsis and my parents. My mum said they will pay but my dad has said he's pissed off and I should pay?

Aibu? If my kids damaged someone's property even if they were with someone else I wouldn't expect them to pay.

OP’s posts: |
Happinesscomesfromwithin Sun 18-Apr-21 14:03:25

I would pay for my niece but then that's me. Family is family and it was a mistake.

Standrewsschool Sun 18-Apr-21 14:04:06

Would it come off your car insurance?

ElaineMarieBenes Sun 18-Apr-21 14:04:44

Your insurance company?

YellowGlasses Sun 18-Apr-21 14:05:01

Surely your car insurance pays?

BlackCatShadow Sun 18-Apr-21 14:06:23

Does it not just go through your car insurance?

BlackCatShadow Sun 18-Apr-21 14:07:02

Slight cross post there

Purplecatshopaholic Sun 18-Apr-21 14:07:03

Why on earth should you pay? Or have your premiums increase because your Insurance pays? She’s 11 - old enough to acknowledge her mistake, and to take responsibility for it

Lostinthemail Sun 18-Apr-21 14:07:07

Either way I’d never ever take her with you again.

Angrypregnantlady Sun 18-Apr-21 14:07:30

If its a lot you'll have to claim on your insurance. Expensive cars aren't a cheap or easy fix. But you'll probably have your excess to pay.

I don't know who should pay tbh. I'd be fuming if I were you. Maybe go halves?

TheresNothingIWantMore Sun 18-Apr-21 14:08:11

I wouldn't go through insurance if I were you - the excess, loss of no claims bonus and premium increases will likely cost far more than the repair

Happycat1212 Sun 18-Apr-21 14:08:18

I think you because she was in your care 🤷‍♀️

Stompythedinosaur Sun 18-Apr-21 14:08:34

I think it's your responsibility as she was with you at the time.

Floralnomad Sun 18-Apr-21 14:10:12

She was with you hence it’s your responsibility.

SheldonesqueHasGotTheWeevils Sun 18-Apr-21 14:10:28

I know she is just a child but given that you warned them to be careful first, I’d not be thrilled at having to pay for what will likely be an expensive repair.

LizBennet Sun 18-Apr-21 14:10:57

Ooh it’s a tough one, I’d be seething though if I’d given a warning first. I’d probably pay it to be honest, though I know my sister would offer to pay for it. (I’d hope).

Singlenotsingle Sun 18-Apr-21 14:11:12

Notify your insurance company just in case the owner wants to claim. Strictly speaking, I think any claim should be against your dn as she did the damage, but I doubt there's enough in her piggy bank to cover the cost of repairs to a Merc.

Chamomileteaplease Sun 18-Apr-21 14:11:28

If you use your car insurance presumably you lose your very valuable no claims bonus?

I would go halves. The niece was old enough to know better but even though I hear it was crowded, you still parked very close to an expensive car.

Hopefully your sister will make your niece pay back the money from pocket money, birthday money etc and a lesson will be learned.

Love51 Sun 18-Apr-21 14:11:52

How much is it? Does she have pocket money? If it were my child in my care they'd be paying 10%. My children have to budget for clothes etc from pocket money, so they could afford it, I think (no idea how much it is, they could afford £50!) If she doesn't have any money she needs to be sent to your house to wash the windows or something. Although if she's accident prone I'd decline.

CuriousaboutSamphire Sun 18-Apr-21 14:12:57

However you decide make sure your DN is fully aware of how much money, time and effort her 'lapse' has cost you and the owner of the car she damaged. I don't mean make her cry, feel anxious etc.

It wasn't an accident, it could easily have been avoided, even without your reminder. Doubtless she has got into and out if cars many times, it won't have been new to her.

She can't just be allowed to say 'oops!' and then forget about it. If she is to learn from her errors of judgement she has to be confronted with the consequences of her actions. How else will she learn?

BornIn78 Sun 18-Apr-21 14:14:08

Your sister should be paying... not you and not the child’s grandparents

sunflowersandbuttercups Sun 18-Apr-21 14:15:34

How much will the damage be? Surely this is what car insurance is for?

Maybe get her mum (not your parents) to pay the excess?

Floweree Sun 18-Apr-21 14:15:43

If she was younger I would say probably you as you had agreed to take her out knowing that something like that could happen. At 11 though and with you even making a point to say it I would let them pay. Yes it was an accident, but seems the right age to learn a bit about consequences.

Butwasitherdriveway Sun 18-Apr-21 14:16:00

Why on earth would your dad pay?

Why isn't DN paying?!

Floweree Sun 18-Apr-21 14:16:10

Well, your sister anyway

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