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AIBU?

Y3 top performing child doing at leat an hour extra work set my parent after school Aibu to be surprised/pissed off?

375 replies

Starzinhereyes · 15/04/2021 23:24

Dd has a nice little friend who by all accounts is away ahead of her classmates. This child is always chosen for play parts, was constantly praised on zoom 😬& is just known as the classes naturally talented kids.... However the child does numerous workbooks, twinkl worksheets & parents extend every bit of learning... The mum (V wealthy sahm) freely talks about extending the child... Aibu to think there is no need for the mother to spend an extra hour a day giving the child extension work?

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

1592 votes. Final results.

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You are being unreasonable
96%
You are NOT being unreasonable
4%
KeyboardWorriers · 15/04/2021 23:26

Some very bright children genuinely love being extended. I did lots of workbooks and extra tuition as a child because I enjoyed it. My son is the same. He does some extra maths classes for the sheer pleasure of it.

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SionnachRua · 15/04/2021 23:28

Why would you be pissed off? Has nothing to do with you, let her at it and pay it no mind. If you feel your child isn't being 'seen' by the school then that's another story.

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Camomila · 15/04/2021 23:28

Maybe the DD wants to do it? I remember being jealous of my cousins getting set holiday homework and getting my grandad to make me some too.

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rainbowthoughts · 15/04/2021 23:29

Aibu to think there is no need for the mother to spend an extra hour a day giving the child extension work?

YABU to think anything really.

Some kids thrive with more, others don't. Who cares?

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buckleten · 15/04/2021 23:30

My younger daughter spends much of her spare time doing maths puzzles out of choice! Some children need extra stimulation and some don't.

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Seventrees · 15/04/2021 23:31

Not sure what that has to do with you? Primary school in the UK isn't particularly challenging for some children. Parents who care about education may well want to teach them more than they're being taught at school. Whether it's schoolwork or something different, eg. drama, music, chess, languages, etc.

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FedUp1984 · 15/04/2021 23:31

Why are you pissed off, exactly?

I have a bright child who loves learning too.
Should I be worried that the other parents will be 'pissed off' with me if I extend her learning at home?

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Tinty · 15/04/2021 23:32

If the child enjoys it and is happy it’s fine. It’s a problem if the child is forced to do the extra work and hates it.

To be fair if a child is struggling at school, teachers often suggest that parents spend an hour every day helping the child with the subject they struggle with.

Is there any difference in spending an hour to help a child with reading or spelling to keep up with the class or an hour spent by a child learning more than their classmates.

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MadMadMadamMim · 15/04/2021 23:34

Wtf has it got to do with you?

Your jealousy comes across so deeply I wouldn't advise you to say this to anyone in real life.

You sound awful.

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RedcurrantPuff · 15/04/2021 23:37

It’s surely none of your business? Leave her to it.

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Leeds2 · 15/04/2021 23:38

I would've loved doing this sort of extended learning when I was at primary school. In fact, I often did, but on my own initiative.

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hettie · 15/04/2021 23:41

Well it's not really anything to do with you. If I was family or a friend of want to know that the kid was genuinely seeking it out. Only because I'd feel a responsibility to that child...if they were unhappy and being horrendously pushed off try and sensitively try and chat to the parents but only if I knew them really well

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Newkitchen123 · 15/04/2021 23:42

Absolutely none of your business
I would have loved this at school. I just really enjoyed school and learning.

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ImAlrightThanx · 15/04/2021 23:43

Not you child, and unless the child is being harmed, not your business.

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LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood · 15/04/2021 23:44

I was that child. All I wanted to do from before I started school was to read and learn. My parents didn’t need to push me at all. My Christmas presents were all books and nice stationery. My most prized possession was my desk. Don’t worry by the time I was 14 I lost interest in doing any extra work! (Although I did continue to reading).

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notapizzaeater · 15/04/2021 23:46

You'd have hated me then ! Every 6 week holidays I chose a subject and spent loads of time researching, writing drawing etc - normally about 40 pages. I used to present it to my teacher when I got back to school. One year I did the Egyptians, one year Henry 8th. I loved doing this. I was a normal child that also played out, cycled etc but loved doing schoolwork.

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Quincejam · 15/04/2021 23:47

My son loved maths at that age and used to ask for maths work books for presents. He's since grown out of it 😂 but does still find maths easy.

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FrankChurchillsHaircut · 15/04/2021 23:48

I don't understand why this would annoy you op.

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BashfulClam · 15/04/2021 23:48

It’s not your child so it’s nothing to do with you. You sound jealous. My friends child loved maths puzzles, self taught herself a higher maths subject that wasn’t offered at her school and got the highest marks in the country and went to Cambridge. She used to do bc work herself outside of school simply because she has an enquiring and academic mind.

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user1473878824 · 15/04/2021 23:49

What exactly are you pissed off by? Her child doing better than yours?

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Sh05 · 15/04/2021 23:52

Why is it any of your business?
If the school were setting her extended work then you'd have a leg to stand on but the parents can do what they like with their own child.

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Changechangychange · 15/04/2021 23:53

@user1473878824

What exactly are you pissed off by? Her child doing better than yours?

I think pretty clearly OP is jealous about the “v wealthy SAHM” part, and is looking for a more socially-acceptable reason to bitch about this woman Hmm
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KeyboardWorriers · 15/04/2021 23:55

For anyone who has a child like this my son is having a fabulous time doing the "maths games" class with thinkersmeetup... he looks forward to it all week www.thinkersmeetup.com/

He also enjoys exploring subjects in greater depth through Outschool classes he chooses.

(No need for any faux concern though op - he also does lots of sport, arguing with siblings, playing fortnite and generally mucking around)

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RowanAlong · 15/04/2021 23:56

Loads of parents do this, to fill in the gaps that school doesn’t cover, to support and extend children’s interests, to help them thrive, to help them with topics they struggle with, or just because their child has the appetite for it!

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RowanAlong · 15/04/2021 23:57

I’d say it’s fairly common, and shouldn’t really be a surprise?

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