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AIBU?

Houseshare problems - tenant's new boyfriend refuses to leave

647 replies

FirstAvenue · 15/03/2021 16:05

Name changed, looking for advice here. I'll try not to go into too much detail.

I own a five bedroom house in a town a fair distance away and I let out four bedrooms under Assured Shorthold Tenancy Agreements. It's an all female house as I have found that way it is generally easier to manage from a distance.

I do everything as professionally as possible, I advertise empty rooms, take references from applicants, tell them the house rules and give the tenants a proper tenancy agreement which states that they have exclusive use of their bedroom and shared use of the communal areas.

One of the House rules states: "Your room is for single occupancy only and boyfriends / girlfriends etc. should only really stay every other weekend." Now it's not that I am a prude, it's just that I have learnt from previous bad experiences that the house becomes overcrowded and untidy and generally starts to smell if the house is over-occupied. It's very hard to let a room if the house smells.

One of the girls, let's call her Ann, got a new boyfriend about six months ago and recently he appears to have "moved in". She says he has not and that she is aware of the house rules, but he is "always there" despite him living nearby. Unfortunately it is not just a case of staying in her room, he seems to spend most of the time watching TV in the living room and has even set his laptop up in the kitchen.

One of the other girls, let's call her Betsy, has complained about his continued presence. Betsy says that she took the house on the basis that it was girls only, and that she feels uncomfortable with him being in the house all the time in his dressing gown.

I've asked Ann to stick to the house rules and to make sure he only stays ever other weekend, and she has at various times in the last two weeks a) denied that he stays there in the week, b) says he does stay over sometimes but the other girls don't mind, or c) says that he is her partner and she wants him to stay as much as possible. It is clear that she is not telling the truth.

Betsy however made a further formal complaint to me last Tuesday, and after a number of texts and phone calls to Ann during which time the boyfriend did not depart, last Friday I had to write an email to Ann asking her to make sure that house rules are obeyed and that her boyfriend only stays two nights a fortnight. I did not get a reply.

Betsy went away for the weekend but when she arrived back last night the boyfriend was there and he was still there this morning. She is now dreading going back home this evening, and it is my understanding that he has now stayed there for 11 consecutive nights. Betsy is now asking me what she should do if he is still there this evening.

Does anyone have any suggestions as to how to resolve this?

OP posts:
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pepsicolagirl · 15/03/2021 16:07

Time to give Ann her marching orders I'm afraid

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HoneysuckIejasmine · 15/03/2021 16:07

Well if Ann is breaking the rules of her tenancy can't you move towards evicting her?

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Plonthy · 15/03/2021 16:08

Kick them both out. Police if necessary.

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Mixedupmuddle · 15/03/2021 16:09

Agree, Ann has to go.

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FFSFFSFFS · 15/03/2021 16:09

Well - if you're in the UK - I imagine he's quite likely to be in breach of Covid rules.

But otherwise obviously you should give Ann notice that she's in breach of her tenancy agreement and start proceedings to evict. What else do you think you should do? You're a professional landlord.

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Cocolapew · 15/03/2021 16:09

Tell Ann to move out, shes breaking the agreement.

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DarthWeeder · 15/03/2021 16:10

You give Ann notice to leave, isn’t it obvious Confused

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FoonySpucker · 15/03/2021 16:14

@DarthWeeder

You give Ann notice to leave, isn’t it obvious Confused

Yes this.

You have asked Ann to abide by the house rules and she is ignoring you.

What else do you think anyone is going to suggest?
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pickingdaisies · 15/03/2021 16:16

So if he's still there you need to get round there, and tell him to get out, while you stand there tapping your foot. Then give the girlfriend her marching orders. You can't leave this to Betsy to sort out.

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FirstAvenue · 15/03/2021 16:17

Sorry I missed that out, current Covid rules are that you have to give someone six month's notice at the moment, so giving notice to Ann is not a short term option. My question is more about what I can say to Betsy who is upset about going home tonight.

OP posts:
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PyjamaFan · 15/03/2021 16:18

Give Ann notice to leave. She obviously thinks that rules don't apply to her.

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PyjamaFan · 15/03/2021 16:19

Tell the bf to leave, now. If he refuses call the police.

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Tangogolf55 · 15/03/2021 16:21

Could he be done for trespassing? Issue him with an invoice for water, electricity etc?

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JustLyra · 15/03/2021 16:22

Give Ann notice. Yes it's long notice atm, but it makes the point that you are taking it seriously.

Go round and ask him to leave and to check that Betsy doesn't have any problems from them.

Tell Betsy if she gets any shit from him/Ann that feels remotely threatening in any way to call the police, then you.

With four unrelated tenants it's a HMO yes? So you can go around to inspect the communal areas, so you can easily check if he has set up camp in the living room and kitchen.

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IntermittentParps · 15/03/2021 16:22

Longer term, evict Ann, obviously.
Short term, go round tonight. Tell Betsey you're doing so. No way should she be left with this.
And tell him, firmly, to leave. No one leaves the house or goes to bed until he has.

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ATowelAndAPotato · 15/03/2021 16:22

Yes, you need to give Ann six months notice (and I would start that process now, as she has clearly shown she doesn’t care about your rules). The boyfriend is not covered by any tenancy agreement and is not supposed to be there, so I would get round and tell him to leave immediately- do you have anyone else you can take with you?
If he refuses, then call the police?

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stackemhigh · 15/03/2021 16:23

@FirstAvenue

Sorry I missed that out, current Covid rules are that you have to give someone six month's notice at the moment, so giving notice to Ann is not a short term option. My question is more about what I can say to Betsy who is upset about going home tonight.

Could you call the police and say he trespassing?
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IntermittentParps · 15/03/2021 16:23

Tell Betsy if she gets any shit from him/Ann that feels remotely threatening in any way to call the police, then you.
Yes, good point. Actually, say this with not just Betsy but also Ann and her BF present.

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Nanny0gg · 15/03/2021 16:23

If he doesn't have permission to be in the house, surely you can phone the police for advice?

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Time4change2018 · 15/03/2021 16:23

Call Ann - tell her he's to be gone and if he returns before xx date you'll be serving her notice to leave.
Yes it might take time but you have to mean it and own your house & decisions.
What have the other tenants said, is he really there as much as the other tenant states ?
What's his situation (not that it should matter) but if he works and has a home / rental can Ann move in with him if you agree to let her leave the tenancy early ?
Possibly install a camera at the door like a ring door and you'll see who's there and not ...

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billy1966 · 15/03/2021 16:24

Call the police for advice. 101.
Betsy is your absolute priority here.

Ann is a CF.
He's living rent free and Betsy doesn't feel safe in her own home.
This is disgraceful.

You need to drive over there tonight and get him out, preferably with the knowledge of the police.

You have an obligation to enforce the rules and keep Betsy safe.

Get onto the police, keep mentioning "safety".

Ann is a nasty piece of work.
Do you know know where she works, because I wouldn't hesitate to tell her you will be informing them that you had to involve the police.

Poor Betsy.
She has my sympathy.

You need to fix this OP and meet it head on.
Betsy has a right to feel safe in her home.
Flowers

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Souther · 15/03/2021 16:24

Ann needs to leave.
It uses to be so uncomfortable when one of my housemates would get a partner.
Sometimes they would walk around in their boxers and spend the time lounging in the living room.
If I've paid for a room, why should I feel too uncomfortable to go and even watch some TV for a bit.
Its not fair on the others.

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Osirus · 15/03/2021 16:24

Give her notice to leave anyway. I know it’s months, but the sooner you do it the sooner snell (hopefully!) be gone. You’ve asked her enough times.

Secondly, suggest the o

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Osirus · 15/03/2021 16:25

She’ll, not snell.

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4Mongrels · 15/03/2021 16:25

Tell Ann that if he’s still there tonight you will be involving the Police and give her notice at the same time.

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