So to give backstory...
Part of a bigger group of close friends, me and this particular guy mate K were extremely close but admittedly have had our times of equally not so much over the years. He was particularly unsupportive when I had my first two babies tho I didn't take it that personally as I was one of the 1st in the group to have children and he was very much about travelling and partying with his now husband at that time.
He has unfortunately had an issue with weed smoking daily which he knows I disapprove of and has effected all aspects of his life over the years though he often fails to see the reality of this and blames everything else (usually his parents).
Last year he had a bit of a MH crisis and spent a lot of time with my family which was lovely. He gave up drugs and was very open and honest about his life and feelings. I was there when he needed me for months.
Come October I had a miscarriage (which to be fair he has no clue about), I lost my mother's best friend who was essentially my only connection to my mother who died when I was a teen and whom I was very close to and our house buy fell through. In January I got Covid at 10 weeks pregnant.
I was at a particular low ebb really from October to January.
My friend was not a great support to me when I lost my friend, the day she died I was on the phone to him and he told me he was running into Sainsbury's and would call me back. He never did. Essentially he hasn't asked me how I am since. Not once. When I had Covid and was in bed for 5 days with a fever he was texting me telling me how lucky I was to get the time off in bed. Since then every time we have spoke he has been asking me essentially for some advice or telling me something that is going on with him.
So he has found out through another friend I'm pregnant and I haven't told him, I actually haven't told a lot of people to be fair and have my reasons for that but he is apparently hurt. My friend who he asked outright asked him if he has actually asked her how she is and then she would likely tell you. He claims he has asked but he has not.
I really don't want a drama or fall out on this and wish I had just told him when I told my other close friends. But ultimately I was mad at him I guess for his lack of interest in me.
AIBU?
And how would you move forward?
Thank you
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AIBU?
Friend mad I didn't tell them I'm pregnant
16 replies
Starstella21 · 08/03/2021 13:27
OP posts:
billy1966 ·
08/03/2021 13:46
@Honeyroar
Don’t do anything. It’s completely up to you who you tell. You don’t owe him anything and he’s not been much of a friend to you. Just brush it off if you see him, say you just hadn’t seen him to tell him.
This.
He's a fairweather friend and not much of one at that.
You certainly don't owe him anything, least of all an apology.
You don't need friends like that.
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