He deleted her straight away.

[Summerpetals]

I'm the best part of 8 months in a dating now relationship. All is good between us. No problems. He treats me really well. He's open and I know about his past relationships as he does mine.

He's mid 40s and I'm 12 years younger. one of things I liked about him was how he has treated me. He's still got some of the old fashioned gent in him. Hes given me no reason to doubt him. He's shown me a women that's messages he's never opened and he blocked her. She made a second profile to contact him again. He showed me all that. He tells me all the time to ask if I don't know who someone is that he talks to online etc. Although 99% of his Facebook his work mates or ex school friends and family.

Last weekend I saw he had liked a profile picture of a women around my age. I had never seen her before. She was also the last friend he had added to his Facebook and it seems he added her last weekend. . I thought nothing much more of it. Even though in the picture she's in a see through white dress on holiday.

I woke up this morning after we spent last night together. He sent me a lovely message before work. I popped on Facebook and it was in my newsfeed he had been looking her photos in the night. I knew he couldn't sleep. But my heart sank. That horrible feeling you get when you can sense what's going on. He liked another holiday photo of her in a skimpy dress and then a selfie of her at home posing as you do.

So I decided to ask. I said it's ony newsfeed this morning you were liking "Sarah Smith's" photos in the night. He said he had known her years and asked if it was a problem as be was happy to delete her. I said no it's not a problem but just so we are clear If you have any interest in her based on looks and you are going to be checking her out I would appreciate you ending things with me first. Within seconds he said oh I've deleted her she's gone. I only want you.

He called me just now on his break and I said can we speak about this morning as you said you had known her years and deleted her so fast. Why did you react like that. He claimed he needs to go through his profile and have a clear out and she's one of them he might aswel delete as he doesn't speak to her.

This is absolute nonsense as she's new on his Facebook and he was checking her out in the night.

I'm feeling abit quiet today as I feel abit confused by his panic delete. As soon as I asked he was straight onto deleting her and telling me how much he's in love with me. I want to believe him. But one of the photos was from her profile 6 months ago so it wasn't a new one.

Not sure what I'm writing this for. Just hope someone can tell me how they would feel.

[jillandhersprite]

I think he sounds like hard work.
Both of you probably spend too much time on social media...
Life is as simple or as complicated as you make it.

[Busbotch]

This is really weird. Facebook doesn’t notify you if someone is looking at/liking other people’s pictures?

[Dayafterday]

I thought that. If you look at someone’s profile in the night or like something, it notifies your friends?

[inchplant]

You both sound like hard work!

[CuriousaboutSamphire]

That, unfortunately, is what social media can reduce you to - both of you!

If you feel that insecure and his actions aren't helping then your lrelationship is more hard work than it ought to be!

[MaLarkinn]

I think it's you who sounds like hard work, sorry.

[GoryGilmore]

I think you need to stop stalking his social media, it’s controlling and a bit odd.

[knittingaddict]

@Dayafterday

I thought that. If you look at someone’s profile in the night or like something, it notifies your friends?

That can't be right can it? Very strange if it does, but I hate facebook and don't use it.

Agree with others that this all sounds like hard work and that goes for both of you. I would be equally suspicious of a man showing me the attention he's getting on social media. Sounds more like hiding in plan sight or trying to make you feel insecure, rather than openness. Your need to discuss his interactions with women on social media? Too much drama by far.

[MuddleMoo]

You're only 8 months in. This is too much.

[Brownteddybear]

I'm the best part of 8 months in a dating now relationship. All is good between us. No problems. He treats me really well.

There you go. End of story. But it's not is it? You both sound like you're not right for each other.

[rainbowrainfall]

This isn't healthy and there is clearly a lack of trust.

I wouldn't be prepared for someone to question my every move. If I like someone's photo on Facebook it's simply because, I like the photo, they look happy, it reminded me of a memory of them etc, it certainly isn't any kind of indication I'm going to cheat or do something I shouldn't be.

You need to trust him and stop checking up or walk away. These cracks at 8months will only get worse!

[jakeee]

You've already posted about this with a different spin on it. Stop stalking his social media or you'll drive yourself nuts.

[Ponoka7]

He could just easily make another FB account. It does sound as though he's lining up reserves. I wouldn't be making any compromises for this relationship.

[Shinyletsbebadguys]

I find your comment incredibly insecure. Saying that if he was planning on checking her out you want to know. I suspect you think it was boundaried but actually you just told him you were insecure. Its quite possible that he deleted her to match your tone and to show you you had nothing to worry about. You went from 0 to 60 really quickly there. Honestly it wouldn't remotely occur to me to say this , its very much playing a little testing game however much you attempt to dress it up as being reasonable. It seems he passed and you are now not happy with how fast he passed the test?

I'm not sure what else you want him to do and you are certainly making a giant meal of this.

Is there any other reason you have to consider him likely to cheat?

[gamerchick]

I've got a real de ja vu here. I'm sure I've answered this thread before with 'how so you know he liked someone's profile picture?'

[Illberidingshotgun]

FB wouldn't tell you that he had been looking at her photos. It wouldn't tell you that he'd liked a profile picture, not even if you were friends with her also, you would have to specifically look at her profile.

It seems you have spent an awful lot on his profile and on the profile of any of his (female) friends. This must be quite an unhappy place to be, OP. I would gently suggest that whether he is up to no good or not, this relationship is not working for you at this current time. He may be the most loyal partner ever, or he may be seeing many other women behind your back, but which ever is true, you are not happy.

Have you been cheated on in the past or have other reasons for not trusting a partner? It may be worth taking some time away from dating as at the moment it sounds like you are looking for reasons to mistrust him.

[knittingaddict]

I agree Shinyletsbebadguys*

[knittingaddict]

@gamerchick

I've got a real de ja vu here. I'm sure I've answered this thread before with 'how so you know he liked someone's profile picture?'

What was the answer? Let me guess.

[imalmostthere]

Christ op. "If you're going to look at her end it with me" - so he can't ever think someone else is attractive? He probably deleted her because you were so riled up over him liking a Photo - which, Facebook DOES NOT notify you if one of your friends likes a picture. Therefore you've been snooping. You're only 8 months in and you're coming across like a controlling loon. Sorry op, but this isn't normal.

[Carolina24]

If your relationship was solid you would trust him. The fact that you don’t suggests deeper issues. I think it’s weird that he showed you attempts made by other women to talk to him - is he trying to make you feel insecure?

It sounds like a lot of stress and drama for the sake of a short relationship.

[gamerchick]

What was the answer? Let me guess

Well it's not a pre cog or I'd be putting tonight's lottery on.

Seriously OP, 8 months in and you're going to drive him batshit so he dumps you. Let it go.

[seensome]

He got caught out by you so deleted, I guess he still enjoys looking
He's known her years but only just added her, it doesn't match up.

[FTEngineerM]

@gamerchick

I've got a real de ja vu here. I'm sure I've answered this thread before with 'how so you know he liked someone's profile picture?'

I’m thinking the same thing... how would they know? Only mutual friends’ pictures that have been liked come up I thought?

[Santosug]

It's 8 months in, you don't trust him and it sounds too intense. Yoh probably need to move on.

[MuddleMoo]

You asked him to have nothing to do with her. So he did what you wanted but he did it too quickly! Poor bloke can't win!