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to think this woman behaved like a snotty cow and there was no need for this?

(108 Posts)
Lludmilla Sat 27-Feb-21 16:21:00

This has really annoyed me and I thought I’d canvas some opinions.

Just been out in my car, mainly to keep it ticking over so the battery doesn’t go flat, which tends to happen now I’m wfh. Part of my route took me along narrow country roads - no footpath or even a verge in places.

So I’m approaching a hump-backed bridge, with one car in front of me. Couple coming towards me on foot, pushing a double buggy. I thought to myself, surely that’s a little risky on narrow/pavement-less roads like this (being as there are always people around who drive like arseholes), but didn’t make eye contact with them or take any further notice of them. One car in front of me, starting to swing clear of the couple with the buggy, I started to do the same. So far, no problem.

Then a car appeared coming over the h-b bridge in the opposite direction forcing traffic going my way to start reversing. At which point I sighed and muttered something to myself, not because anyone was doing anything wrong but because I’d already had a few tricky ‘passing’ scenarios on the same journey, and I was beginning to regret taking a ‘rural’ route so to speak.

Again, no attention paid to the couple, who were passing my car by now, I wasn’t sighing or muttering at them, I was just frustrated in general.

Then the car in front of me started reversing rather too quickly, to the point where I had to sound my horn in warning as there was a real chance they’d hit me before I had chance to start reversing myself.

The reversing car stopped and I looked over my shoulder before starting to reverse.

At which point I became aware that Buggy Lady had turned around and was staring in the direction of my car and gesticulating with an angry look on her face, clearly assuming I’d sounded my horn at her. Didn’t engage in any way, but as I was waiting for the car coming the other way to pass, I could see through my rear-view mirror as she eventually turned back the way she was going, walking very huffily from what I could tell (her ponytail was swinging like mad, if that doesn’t sound too odd grin ) for a few steps, then turned back around again and made one of those ‘arms in the air’ gestures, again with a really snotty look on her face.

I mean, WTF?! I can't imagine why she'd have done that other than because she assumed I was sounding my horn at her. And if she did, then she was COMPLETELY BLOODY WRONG - defensive much??!

So:
1. AIBU to think it wasn’t the safest place to be pushing a double buggy in the first place, and that they’d have been better taking their walk somewhere there was a pavement or at least a verge?
and:
2. AIBU to think she behaved like an OTT arsehole with all the looking and the gestures and the conclusion-jumping when I wasn’t even concerning myself with her but with the actual traffic on the actual road???

No vote as it’s a double AIBU, so to speak.

OP’s posts: |
Lludmilla Sat 27-Feb-21 16:21:24

Oh oops, I forgot to disable the vote. lol Ignore.

OP’s posts: |
MissSmith80 Sat 27-Feb-21 16:23:22

Might one of the children in the buggy been asleep and she was frustrated that the sounding of your horn woke them up?

dontgobaconmyheart Sat 27-Feb-21 16:29:01

I feel your pain OP, rural roads stress me right out and I live in (mild) fear of these passing place type scenarios.

However, it's up to her where she walks. If she lives locally and there is no footpath then there is little option. It's likely usually quiet due to lockdown so presents no issue until days like today when the world and their dog have decided to go out in the sunshine.

You're also being a bit U given that you have absolutely no idea whatsoever she even was directing anything at you or apportioning blame your way so why waste time getting worked up about it. You appear to be jumping to conclusions and being defensive whilst accusing her of being an 'arsehole' for the same thing.

I'd just forget about it, you did nothing wrong, it doesn't really matter.

CovidCrow Sat 27-Feb-21 16:29:33

I wouldn't worry about it. She mistakenly thought you were beeping at her. So what?!
Some people are moody and aggressive, don't give her a minute more of your time.

Reinventinganna Sat 27-Feb-21 16:29:44

If you drive on roads with no pavement you have to share it with pedestrians/cyclists/horse riders.

Also she wouldn’t have known why you were behaving as you did. It’s a misunderstanding, nothing to get your knickers in a twist about.

Fwiw we live rurally, no pavements for about 5 miles. I drive on the roads but also use the roads for walking/running/cycling. Why should I travel to be able to walk on a pavement?
I can walk to a couple of beaches from home (5 miles each way) but maybe I should drive?
Here we all show respect for each other and try to keep everyone safe. Holiday makers are a different story!

MindyStClaire Sat 27-Feb-21 16:30:35

Just a misunderstanding. She thought you beeped at her while she was doing a perfectly reasonable thing in going for a walk. She has two small children and is probably sick of pushing the double buggy along the same roads I may be describing myself here and if you woke or scared one of the children it was probably the straw that broke the camel's back.

Reinventinganna Sat 27-Feb-21 16:31:00

I hate big roads and so mostly stay away, they stress me out and it effects my driving.

Franpan Sat 27-Feb-21 16:31:16

YANBU. Walk in the middle of the road and you’re going to hear car horns sometimes.

Palavah Sat 27-Feb-21 16:33:25

I think you're being overly defensive about her overreaction, tbh. Everyone's on a short fuse atm.

In lots of areas there isn't much choice of where to walk. If she's taking a buggy out in a rural area she might not have had another option.

hammersrock Sat 27-Feb-21 16:33:46

Your horn probably scared the crap out of her children

Covidcorvid Sat 27-Feb-21 16:33:53

She’s probably sick of walking along the road as well but maybe has no other choice during lockdown to get out. If she saw you chuntering to yourself then the horn being sounded then she incorrectly thought it was all aimed at her.

Tal45 Sat 27-Feb-21 16:33:59

It sounds very dangerous to have a double buggy on a road with no pavement, people often drive very fast on narrow roads. I wouldn't worry about her getting annoyed, she was probably totally stressed at walking along the road (maybe it wasn't her idea or she felt she had no other choice) and then thinking you beeped at her tipped her over the edge. x

UhtredRagnarson Sat 27-Feb-21 16:34:00

This is so funny. Nothing happened. She didn’t even say anything to you. She just looked at you funny.

Brownteddybear Sat 27-Feb-21 16:35:30

Your battery goes flat a lot? Maybe get that looked into. I also think you're dwelling on the situation too much and coming across as defensive for your actions. It was a misunderstanding and you likely woke up her child or scared her?

gamerchick Sat 27-Feb-21 16:36:09

Ah let it go. Everyones doing their own journey. Horns can freak kids out, one might not have been sleeping/end of teather parent.

I'd have done exactly the same as you in the scenario you described. Don't take it to heart.

snowblower Sat 27-Feb-21 16:36:46

Well you are assuming her anger was directed at you, does that make you an arsehole?. Maybe it was directed at the car reversing, maybe she had an earlier encounter with the on comming vehicle, maybe she was having a row with her partner. Who knows?. It's a non event

MrsTerryPratchett Sat 27-Feb-21 16:38:29

Well she may have been walking from her home, which is a good idea at the moment. While you were making an entirely unnecessary car journey.

The beeping was just a misunderstanding that happens frequently. Everyone always thinks everything is about them! We're all such narcissistic weirdos. grin

Cocomarine Sat 27-Feb-21 16:38:59

If she’s unreasonable for taking her buggy on an unsuitable road, you’re unreasonable for taking your car on a road with added hazards.

No pavement, one way humped back bridge? You could have driven anywhere to charge a battery, but no, you chose to add to the danger on a hazardous route.

People in glass houses..

Dollywilde Sat 27-Feb-21 16:41:02

No one BU, but you’re slightly U to take it so personally.

My mum and dad live rurally and we had to stay there when DD was weeks old as we were having work done. In order to leave the house we have to walk on their very rural road. There’s certain rules about this stuff - walking into oncoming traffic unless that puts you on an inside bend, and so on - but the onus is on drivers to drive safely in anticipation of pedestrians as there’s no pavement. So I don’t think they were BU on your first point.

The second point is a pure misunderstanding which I would find mildly irritating but not enough to post on MN.

Oysterbabe Sat 27-Feb-21 16:44:25

You probably woke up the child that she had just got to sleep and she was pissed off.

Franpan Sat 27-Feb-21 16:47:33

Roads are not designed for pedestrians with buggies. People walking on them shouldn’t really be that surprised by a car horn.

intheenddoesitreallymatter Sat 27-Feb-21 16:53:21

MissSmith80

Might one of the children in the buggy been asleep and she was frustrated that the sounding of your horn woke them up?

Still irrational.

A road collision is far more important than a baby's nap time.

YANBU OP some people are just that way out.

oneglassandpuzzled Sat 27-Feb-21 17:02:59

Tal45

It sounds very dangerous to have a double buggy on a road with no pavement, people often drive very fast on narrow roads. I wouldn't worry about her getting annoyed, she was probably totally stressed at walking along the road (maybe it wasn't her idea or she felt she had no other choice) and then thinking you beeped at her tipped her over the edge. x

I would have had nowhere to walk if i hadn’t taken my children out in a double buggy. Completely normal behaviour where I live.

TheUndoingProject Sat 27-Feb-21 17:04:59

We judge ourselves according to our intentions and others by their actions.

She assumed (fairly reasonably) that you were honking at her. If you find driving on rural roads quite stressful you should probably have chosen another route.

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