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Start using Mumsnet PremiumI don't want my kids to be vegetarian
(534 Posts)DC (15 & 13) have decided they want to go vegetarian. I don't want to go vegetarian and neither does DH, so they'd have to have different meals. I/DH don't want to be wasting time making 2 different meals whenever we want meat or fish, and we don't really have space for 2 people to be cooking at once. WIBU to say no?
Yes you would be unreasonable. Being a vegetarian is usually a moral choice so it would be wrong to expect them to eat meat.
I would encourage it, many meals are veggie anyway
Just tell the 15year old they need to make the veggie meals on nights where you and dh won’t be making veggie meals. At that age there is no reason why they cannot be the cook once or twice a week.
Yes. They don’t want to eat meat, it’s unfair to make them. However you don’t have to cook for them but you do have to accept refusing to do so will probably make family meals a thing of the past. Get them an easy veggie cook book?
yabu. It’s really not hard or time consuming to make veggie meals. Why don’t you look at veggie meals for you all and you can just add meat to yours
Yes. You would be. You can't and shouldn't force someone to eat meat!
You could tell them they need to cook their own meals, you could make meals where meat is separate and they can just not have the chicken leg or whatever but eat the rest.
They can make all the moral choices they like when they're shopping/cooking for themselves. Offer extra mashed potatoes and cabbage - and see how long it lasts!
I’m in this position, I’ve put it off until 11 but we are all trying to eat more plant based food for environmental reasons. It a pita but I can’t force feed them chicken.
My son was vegetarian from the age of 15, he cooked for himself - and often for me too because his meals were delicious. Ten years ago he became vegan, again his cooking is lovely. You’re being VVU, especially if they’re eschewing meat on ethical grounds.
So basically you are putting up every obstacle in their way about food they are making a lifestyle choice why wouldn't you try and help them.
There are so many meals you can make and add fish or meat to, your kids are also old enough to cook sometimes, I’d get them a veggie cook book for Christmas and let them get on with it.
At 15 I'd tell my dd that if I couldnt easily adapt what I'm already making to suit her she can cook for herself. I'd also discuss with her protein needs and how she plans to ensure shes getting the nutrients she needs
I'm veggie, my husband and son are not. About a third of our family meals are fully vegetarian each week and the rest are very easily adapted for me to be meat free or to add meat for them. I was 16 when I stopped eating meat and would have done so earlier if my parents had allowed it. It made me very unhappy and mealtimes were miserable for us all until they gave in. Its not as hard as you think. Get them involved in the planning and cooking.
Lazy, disrespectful and dismissive. Don't be surprised if they start resenting you.
Come to a compromise
You will cook veggie only dishes 2x a week for all the family. You will do enough for leftovers.
On one night they will cook the family a veggie meal. And enough for leftovers
So on the remaining 4 days that you eat meat, they just reheat leftovers
YABU.
As others have said, it’s not difficult to add meat/fish later. It’s cheaper, can be healthier, better for the environment and people shouldn’t be forced to eat meat if they don’t want to.
13 and 15 is old enough to meal plan, shopping list and cook, I'd say tell them you'll add their list to the weekly shop and then let them get on with it.
Compromise. You and DH agree to cut down the amount of meat you eat to say twice a week. On those nights, DC have to cook their own meal.
Surely by refusing your just likely to lead to them not eating?
Work with them to make it happen, plan meals for you all that are veggie, allocate them a day each to cook, plan meals that can easily be made with and without meat.
The more you push against it the more likely you are to create an issue
It’s possible to make meals that are broadly the same where two portions have meat/fish & two portions don’t e.g. pasta, chilli, curry with veg based sauces, with added meat or fish on two portions, or meat sausages and vegetarian sausages with whatever you’d normally serve.
Yes YWBU. I stopped eating meat at 14 and am still vegetarian/vegan over 20 years later. My mum found it challenging but I remember really valuing the respect she showed that choice, other family members were less supportive (my dearly departed Nan commenting ‘oh really- you’re not STILL doing that!’ At my wedding was amusing!)
No-one has to be cooking at once.
Let them cook theirs at a different time. Alternatively, give them what you're having but minus the meat or fish.
At that age they are quite capable of cooking a veggie meal for you all three nights a week. And perhaps you or your husband could cook a meal that adapts for all of you on the other four nights.
Of course you all will need to add items to the shopping list for whoever does that.
That way they learn some cooking skills and you and your Dh get to eat some new dishes.
Why don’t you have a trial run and all go veggie for a month?
You never know, you might like it.
I started off just eating less meat. The less I ate the less I wanted to. I’m fully veggie know because the smell, taste and texture turns my stomach. And I used to be a proper chicken and rare steak eater...
Compromise. Family meals veggie. Take aways/eating out whatever you choose.
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