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It's only a fiver but..........

(174 Posts)
Taikoo Thu 03-Dec-20 11:49:30

I'm being an arse maybe, but anyway.....

A few weeks back, I helped a friend, let's call her Jane, to move flat.
Went to her place at about 5:30pm after work on a Friday, expecting her to be ready to go move then. She said she'd be ready to go at 5:30pm.
She wasn't ready. No problem. I waited about 90 minutes until she was ready.
Another friend, I'll call her Bella, joined us to help Jane move, in the meantime.

We helped Jane to bring her heavy suitcases and other stuff down the stairs, in the lift and out to the building entrance to wait for the taxis.
Jane had booked two taxis.
She was moving from one furnished flat to another so we didn't have to hump furniture, luckily.

Jane took the first taxi and some of her stuff to the new flat.
Me and Bella waited 30 minutes more for taxi number 2 and took ourselves and the rest of Jane's stuff to her new place.
It took about 30 minutes to get to the new flat.
We live in a very large city.

I paid the equivalent of 5 pounds when we got near the flat. The taxi could not enter the housing compound and drive right to Jane's flat. And we couldn't find Jane's flat anyway as we had never been there before.
So me and Bella got out on the street, took the stuff to Jane's flat and I presumed that Jane would pay me back. Jane came out on the street to find us.

We had been promised food for giving up our Friday evening to help Jane move. She said she'd get takeaway.
Two other friends turned up and one of them had brought milkshakes and 5 little boxes of french fries and cheese dip, which were stone cold.
No other food was forthcoming. Jane didn't offer us anything.

By 9pm, Jane was making signs that she was tired so us 4 all headed off home. I was starving so I went to my favourite burger place for food at about 9:30pm.

A few days later, I Whatsapped Jane and asked her for the money back. She said she give it to me but she hasn't yet.
We work in the same place.
I see her a lot.
It's now two weeks later.

Will I ask her one more time for my money tomorrow, or not?
It's not much money, only a fiver, but i'm annoyed because i gave up my Friday evening to help her and now i'm down a fiver.
And I don't think it's her right to expect me to pay for her taxi after we've helped her move.

OP’s posts: |
PizzaForOne Thu 03-Dec-20 11:55:03

YANBU to ask again.

But given her behaviour so far, there is a fair chance she just won't pay up or if she does will be arsey about it and how it's a trivial amount or similar. Alternatively she may have genuinely forgot and be very apologetic.

TokyoSushi Thu 03-Dec-20 11:56:48

I suspect Jane is a CF and isn't going to pay.

Cookiesandscones Thu 03-Dec-20 11:57:24

I would probably let it go this time but if anything cropped up again ask her for money in advance for anything and if she doesn't have it say you don't either so she will have to find another way to do whatever she was asking for.

I had this once a friend asked me to lend £5 until she got paid and I lent her it 2 days later she asked if I could lend another £5 which I did, her pay day came and she said she forgot to get the money out, I said no problem 2 days later she said ah could I wait until next week because she had spent all her money. I agreed but I never got paid back, she then asked a month later for £10 and I refused and said sorry no because you never paid the last one back, she hasn't asked to lend money again and doesn't mention the £10 she never paid back.

GirlInterrupted Thu 03-Dec-20 11:57:38

confused 5 pound, really? If that's your biggest problem.... Let it go, she might help you one day when you need a friend

ForTheLoveOfCatFood Thu 03-Dec-20 11:57:43

She’s not a friend

ForTheLoveOfCatFood Thu 03-Dec-20 11:58:34

I wouldn’t be rushing to engage with someone who is like that. Unless it’s massively out of character for her.
I would just let the £5 go as I wouldn’t want to waste any more time on them

Brmmbrmmm Thu 03-Dec-20 11:59:03

With regards to the £5 I would let it go if she continues to ignore your attempts to ask for it back, would be different if it was more.
However i would use this example as a reason to not help her out again as she seems ungrateful and if she wants to know why then remind her about the £5 and the food!

MsVestibule Thu 03-Dec-20 12:02:00

I'd let it go but certainly wouldn't rush to do her any favours in the future.

CakeRequired Thu 03-Dec-20 12:02:07

She's not going to pay up and there's no point asking. Just ditch her as a friend and refuse to help her in future ever again. If you continue, you're just a mug and she knows it, hence why she's being a cf.

SchrodingersImmigrant Thu 03-Dec-20 12:02:18

I get it. It's the matter of principle rather than the fiver itself.
I don't think you will get it back. I am surprised she couldn't get a large taxi to fit everything in since you live in large city. They have large 7 seaters 2ith lots of space everywhere. Was the fiver just on top of the other girl paying? Did she get her money back? Or is the taxi so cheap where you are (assuming you are not in UK based on "equivalent of 5 poumds")?

WiggleSquiggle Thu 03-Dec-20 12:02:20

I’d ask once more and if she doesn’t pay up within a day or two, I’d leave it and just have very little to do with her socially anymore.
It sounds like she’s likely a CF.

Goinghome20 Thu 03-Dec-20 12:03:17

Remind her she still owes you a fiver.

If she doesn't pay then keep an eye on her in future!

I'd also find out if she owes others money, I have a friend like this she borrowed money from everyone and never paid it back. She was having a hard time but over a year on now, no sign of the cash...

1stDecember Thu 03-Dec-20 12:04:00

As the others have said, time to take a step back from this CF.

It's not the amount of money that's important, it's how entitled and rude she's been.

BrumBoo Thu 03-Dec-20 12:04:10

GirlInterrupted

confused 5 pound, really? If that's your biggest problem.... Let it go, she might help you one day when you need a friend

Posters like you really need to stop posting this nonsense. A fiver is an amount some people can't really afford to lose, especially just before Christmas. Quite frankly is its 'nothing' then the friend shouldn't have an issue paying it back, right?

As for expecting help in the future, I think everything in the OP suggests the friend is a bit of a pisstaker, and the idea of getting anything in return is laughable.

Thisisworsethananticpated Thu 03-Dec-20 12:05:30

She’s a cf
It’s a dead friendship now
Screw her and forget the £5

Taikoo Thu 03-Dec-20 12:06:42

We are not in Europe.
Jane did not order a 7 seater taxi, there was none available in rush hour, so she ordered 2 x 4 seater taxis.
The taxi ride in total was a fiver.

OP’s posts: |
Taikoo Thu 03-Dec-20 12:07:51

GirlInterrupted

confused 5 pound, really? If that's your biggest problem.... Let it go, she might help you one day when you need a friend

Hi Jane.

OP’s posts: |
notacooldad Thu 03-Dec-20 12:09:10

If you are working in the same place u would WhatsApp a message saying something like 'can I meet you at the main door at 5 for that fiver you owe ' or something similar that fits your working day maybe ' shall I come over to you for that fiver"
I would pester someone over 50p if i thought they were mugging me off ( and yet give someone £50 if I thought they were genuine without a second thought)

MatildaonaWaltzer Thu 03-Dec-20 12:12:14

I'd probably overlook the moving day stresses of failing to reimburse / feed you at that point. But (covid restrictions aside - not sure where you are), she could have made up for it by inviting you for dinner / sending flowers by now

soschreibfaul Thu 03-Dec-20 12:12:47

GirlInterrupted

There is nothing in OP's post to suggest Jane would be a good friend and help her out if needed.

Jane has taken the help, which was quite a lot, very much for granted. By the sounds of it she's a taker.

WattleOn Thu 03-Dec-20 12:14:16

Ask her for the money in front of other people. Tie it in to lunch or a coffee, eg:
I’m off for lunch now, Jane, can I have that fiver you owe me, please?

It subtly links the money and your ability to pay for lunch. Very awkward for her to refuse (and make you starve) in front of witnesses. And if she does try that, say ‘but what about my lunch’? And let her fill in the blanks

WinterWhore Thu 03-Dec-20 12:18:53

You dont sound like friends confused I'd never ever ask my friend for £5 back but that's upto you I guess. You helped her and it was like you wanted rewarding for helping? If you are friends you should want to help out. You sound so petty and I seriously envy your life if this is all you have to worry about.

RB68 Thu 03-Dec-20 12:19:33

Wait for payday and organise coffee or lunch just after so she has no excuse. Sometimes when you move there is deposit overlap etc so it may just be she doesn't have that cash at the moment.

Peachy1381 Thu 03-Dec-20 12:20:28

Not sure you need to cut out of your life over a fiver and a take-away let down. Seems a bit harsh. But I do agree she is a CF and with the posters who say don't lend again. Stick to that and if she asks why tell her. Some people are a bit shitty with money, doesn't make them them monsters but you do need to be clear with them and set boundaries.

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