For context, DP has been furloughed from March-September with some working at home weeks. During this time I was working from home then gave birth to our first baby in August. DP returned to the office full time in October which was a massive relief, I got into more of a routine with the baby and life felt more normal, we had some space from each other and got on better. However, when second lockdown commenced, back he came with his computer and 2 monitors to take over the dining table once more. I won't say what he does for a job but he's been making the same phone call over and over again for at least half the day, every day and it is driving me insane. He has a very loud phone voice. Our house isn't small but has an open plan kitchen/diner/living room. I have asked him to work upstairs but he's said this isn't possible. Granted he would need to sort out a table/desk and longer internet cable but I suspect his refusal is mainly because he can't be bothered and doesn't see the issue. Due to lockdown the only place I can go out to is my mum half an hour away (support bubble) or for a walk. So I'm spending most of the day upstairs in our bedroom with the baby. He has said I don't need to change anything like be quieter or not have the tv on if I'm downstairs but I'm constantly aware he's sat there trying to work and I feel really constrained all the time. Our relationship is suffering partly because I never have any time away from him and we have nothing to say to each other because we're always together, plus the added strain of first baby. I feel like I'm suffocating slowly and my quality of life is shit. I was hoping he'd be called back to the office post lockdown but he hasn't been. We are in a tier 2 area but with very low cases. I have explained how I feel to him and he has reluctantly arranged to return to the office and be the only one there. However, I can see this being thrown in my face at a later date so I asked him if he was sure it was ok. He said he was annoyed at having to get up earlier and spend money on petrol but would do it. I feel really guilty for inconveniencing him but I can't go on like this with no real end in sight. AIBU by sticking to my guns on this? Part of me feels like I should just suck it up but I can't see how I can go on like this. I did suggest maybe he could just do half the week in the office but he doesn't want to have to bring all his equipment back and forth.
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AIBU?
To insist DP goes back to the office
150 replies
Islandislandisland · 30/11/2020 09:42
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