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AIBU?

Is it selfish for my husband and I to go to Japan with our 1 year old?

223 replies

DisneyBaby · 27/11/2020 09:14

My husband and I have always planned to go to Japan in May 2021 from when I found out I was pregnant last year. It’s somewhere we have always wanted to visit and it’s pretty expensive so we thought it would be good to go before our daughter is 2 as it would be easier to do it whilst we only have 1 child rather than 2 or 3 plus we can save on a separate plane ticket as she’ll be on our laps. We figure that from a couple of years time we will probably only be able to European holidays for a while if we have several kids so want to get one last big one in. Our planned itinerary in Japan is full of loads of things that she’ll enjoy as much as us e.g Tokyo Disney, Universal Studios, going on a bullet train and time on the beach in Okinawa, as well as some sightseeing and museums etc, lots of different sights, smells for her to take in and experience. I know the flight may be a challenge and also the time difference but other than that I can’t see anything wrong with it...
My parents seems to disapprove of us going. I’m not sure whether this is because of the long flight or because they don’t deem this to be a baby/toddler friendly destination or possibly because of covid too. They haven’t said why, but every time I talk about it I can see them shake their head a little bit, see the disapproval on their faces and they change the subject.
Are we crazy or selfish to go to a long haul destination with a toddler? Or am I right in thinking this is a good time to go?? What do you think?

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DisneyBaby · 27/11/2020 09:16

Just to add, we haven't booked yet, we're going to book around March/April to see how things go with covid and this vaccine

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40weekswithno2 · 27/11/2020 09:16

I don't see what the problem is. My mum was even disapproving when we took our then 1yo ds to Spain Hmm
We've had some wonderful holidays with ds including the US when he was 3 which is arguably a more challenging age for travel than 1.
Enjoy your trip.

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TrollTheRespawnJeremy · 27/11/2020 09:18

I think you’re going to miss out on so much with a toddler.
The nightlife in Japan is so fascinating. If you’ve never been, and may never return, I’d be annoyed not to experience it.

I’d find it quite stressful too. Small children are unpredictable at the best of times and I’d be mortified if I was visiting, say a shrine, and my toddler was having a moment.

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MRC20 · 27/11/2020 09:18

You'll be absolutely fine, go for it. I spent many years in Japan and it's one of the best and safest countries to travel with children. It's a very family friendly country. You'll have a great time and the Japanese love nothing more than a cute foreign baby to coo over xx

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BlueThistles · 27/11/2020 09:18

Japan is beautiful ... enjoy it 🌺

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PTW1234 · 27/11/2020 09:18

I would! From about 2 we took our DS everywhere, the longest flight he did was only 7/8 hours admittedly, but we took night flights and he slept.

I would also recommend Venice whilst they are this age.. we did it at 3 and he too big to carry but also too small walk too far. Prams are not really an option Grin

Go and enjoy yourself

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mamaoffourdc · 27/11/2020 09:19

Nope go! And have fun x

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40weekswithno2 · 27/11/2020 09:19

@TrollTheRespawnJeremy op is already pregnant though so the choice is to go with the 1yo or miss out on everything (not just night life).
People generally understand toddlers having a moment, and you can always quickly walk outside with them.

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Parkandride · 27/11/2020 09:21

God do it, its a great. I spent 3 weeks and didn't do much nightlife stuff and it was still incredible

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Sasuma · 27/11/2020 09:21

Japan is very child friendly IME. For example, baby changing spaces are much more easily found, Shinkansen have family friendly carriages and breastfeeding spaces (not sure if all do so might be something to check if you need). I agree you’ll miss out on some stuff as you won’t be able to experience the night life, but you can always go back when the kids are older/without them.

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DarkMutterings · 27/11/2020 09:21

1 year old is easier than 2 plus
Get a heavy duty sling for some parts of the trip - push chairs won't always be a good option.
But I hate to say it - COVID may or may not be under control by this spring. Japan has some quite stringent entry restrictions and quarantine

www.japan.travel/en/coronavirus/

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TheKeatingFive · 27/11/2020 09:22

Go for it. Japan is amazing.

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LeaveMyDamnJam · 27/11/2020 09:22

I love Japan. I was supposed to be back there this year but obviously that didn’t happen. There is so much to see I wouldn’t waste my time with American theme parks though.

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MRC20 · 27/11/2020 09:25

I wouldn't worry about crying either. People accept babies cry and within seconds you'd no doubt be surrounded by people trying to distract and amuse him/her.

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littlemiceinthecorner · 27/11/2020 09:25

It does kind of depend on your child. We have done lots Of traveling with ours (DH is from overseas) and the actual traveling and time difference is the easy bit. Our trips tend to fall apart if we try to squeeze too much in or don’t account for our fussy eaters.

I’m really surprised by the people who say Japan is really child friendly. I know 2 Japanese women. One came to the UK in her 20s and the other was born here. Neither likes taking their DC to Japan because they say it’s really un child friendly, in fact one said she was never going back with DC after the last trip!

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WhatWouldYouDoWhatWouldJesusDo · 27/11/2020 09:26

I'd go for it.........but.bear in mind it depends on what brand of baby you get.

If you end up with a fussy, refluxy, pram and sling refusing breed who will only sleep in their cot it won't be as enjoyable as one of the mellow models.

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liveitwell · 27/11/2020 09:26

YANBU. Lots of people do long haul trips with babies, it's far easier than with toddlers.

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FelicityPike · 27/11/2020 09:26

I absolutely would! Wouldn’t even give it a second though. Enjoy!

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ShyTown · 27/11/2020 09:32

I think you’re stretching to say she’ll enjoy some bits as much as you at only a year old. That said, it’s a great time to do what you want before they start having strong opinions on things and I would definitely still go! We lived abroad when DD was a baby so have done a lot of long haul flights and once she outgrew then bassinet (7 months for us) we always booked her a seat. Personally I wouldn’t consider doing a flight that long with a 1YO lap infant unless planning to book Biz Class for the extra space.

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romeolovedjulliet · 27/11/2020 09:34

dd is planing to work with children in japan in next year and is nearly fluent in japanese and korean, as she loves the culture and life style.
she'll be thrilled to read this thread. Smile

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DougRossIsTheBoss · 27/11/2020 09:37

Very amused about the missing out on nightlife comment. If she's already pregnant then I think the 'checking out the nightlife on holiday' ship has sailed.....

We are planning to go in 2022 with our 10 and 14 yr olds and still won't get to check out any nightlife but I wouldn't dream of going without them as I think it's going to be a big family adventure. I have been dreaming/ planning/ saving in lockdown.

I think I should have travelled more when they were tiny. They actually get harder to travel with as toddlers (embarrassing memory of DD being scooped up by a security guard at the Pompidou Center as she charged at an artwork at full tilt with outstretched grubby finger. Also her diet of bread and crisps on said holiday as she refused to eat any lovely French cuisine).

I say definitely go now. It'll be much harder with a 2/3/4 year old.

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WouldBeGood · 27/11/2020 09:39

It sounds great @DisneyBaby!

And they’re pretty portable at that age. Go sooner rather than later before they’re properly mobile is my advice.

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Bells3032 · 27/11/2020 09:42

We went to Japan last year and was suprised at how child friendly everything was. Even the public toilets has little holders to put the kid whilst youre on the loo.

Not sure how much of universal you can do with a baby though and even disney has its limits though probably still enough to do for a day.

We had an amazing time and there was nothing we couldn't have done with a baby.

Just remember they don't get their own seat on the plane so have to be on your laps which can get very uncomfortable.

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LadyGAgain · 27/11/2020 09:44

I would go! Flight is fine. We did longer with an 11 month old. Well worth it! Enjoy!!

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Oly4 · 27/11/2020 09:45

We travelled loads with our babies, it gets harder when they’re older!! Have fun

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