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AIBU?

Anyone else get Xmas anxiety?

22 replies

naechunce · 22/11/2020 00:36

I have 3 kids. No one knows what they want. We don't know what we're doing on Xmas day. I haven't bought a single gift and all I can see are people being more organised than ever!
I know it will be 'All right on the night' but right now it fills me with immense anxiety like I'm never going to get there!!!!

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Givemeabreak88 · 22/11/2020 01:07

Why haven’t you bought anything yet? Not a criticism just wondering? As I find the later you leave it the harder it feels.

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naechunce · 22/11/2020 01:11

Because I'm lazy!! What have you bought???

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Givemeabreak88 · 22/11/2020 01:14

Tbf I didn’t buy much till recently as I tend to leave it later than I should, I have 4 so I know your pain! Mainly peppa pig bits for the youngest but I know I’m going to regret that Confused
what ages are they?

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Butterer · 22/11/2020 01:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ginandplatonic · 22/11/2020 01:18

I’m with you OP. How old are your kids? Mine don’t know what they want either annoyingly. If they are teens I have a thread in the Christmas topic where people have given some good teen boy suggestions, and there’s one for teen girls too.

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naechunce · 22/11/2020 01:23

They are 16, 11 and 7. So well past Peppa Pig! Eldest wants a jacket that cost more than I earn in a month 🙄

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Givemeabreak88 · 22/11/2020 01:27

Oh so definitely past that stage! It gets harder when they get older my 8 year old has already started asking for money 😒 maybe there will be some good deals on Black Friday

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Charleyhorses · 22/11/2020 05:26

Well the oldest 2 can be given a budget. Tell them to write down several suitable things for you to choose from.
I feel your pain though.

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Beentherefonethat · 22/11/2020 05:32

I’m the same op but I’ve bought one thing! Mine are 12, 13, 14 & 15. One of mine wants a 600€ electric bike. Kill me

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blubberball · 22/11/2020 05:50

Yep, I get it every year. This year feels even worse, because I have no idea what's happening and my eldest is 12, and doesn't really know what he wants.

We put a lot of expectations on ourselves I think. The best gift we can give to ourselves and others might be to lower the expectations this year.

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cottonTailTrail · 22/11/2020 06:03

I'm so glad you started this thread op as I thought I was the only person who has Xmas anxiety.

I have three dc and the eldest also wants something that I cannot afford. It's the only thing they have asked for too !

I started a few weeks ago buying presents. Usually the dc give me some ideas and I feel content if I've managed to get something they've asked for.

This year I've literally just looked for sale items that I think they'll like.

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Counterpane · 22/11/2020 06:13

I've been resigned to a low-key Christmas since the first lock down, simply because there was no way the CV-19 figures were going to fall during flu season.

The general plan is to visit if we can or do a skype/zoom session if we can't.

Small token presents and cash transfers direct to bank accounts so they can choose their own or just save it.

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Rina66 · 22/11/2020 06:26

It is a very stressful time of year, the list of jobs just seems endless, but I think you have to remember it all gets done in the end and what doesn’t get done, wasn’t that important. Everyone I’ve spoken to this year has said it’s getting harder to buy for their children. When mine were younger I used to make a category list and buy at least one thing from each category, on top of what they wanted as a main present - book, DVD, CD, PJ’s, toiletries, craft item, bedroom item, diary, sweets/chocs, clothes, hat/scarf/gloves, game, personalised item, stationery/pens, thank you notes - I know some items are obsolete now, but the system worked for me!

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Caspianberg · 22/11/2020 06:41

Just go easy and simple, especially this year.

Try and sit down one evening and just buy everyone a few stocking fillers online, amazon for ease if your not sure where. Then pick up some edibles per child to add next time you go to supermarket ( or get a delivery).

And just sit everyone down and adjust their expectations. There’s no point in them expecting a coat that costs more than your monthly salary when it’s not happening. Just say the budget is x amount max, please can they write a list of 5 things they might want for that and you will pick 1-2 things off list as a surprise depending on cost. They know money doesn’t grow on trees

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MummmyDayCareNameChangeAGAIN · 22/11/2020 06:41

@Butterer

I've no family, few friends locally, and all I had planned for xmas was going away for a couple of days to a hotel on my own.

Now my plans appear to be staying at home on my own (as usual). I'm not looking forward it tbh. I was well excited about having someone else cook me breakfast for a few days and escaping/avoiding xmas here for a bit.

Flowers
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Ploughingthrough · 22/11/2020 06:57

Every year. I'm even organised and have bought pretty much everything I'm going to get for my DC, but I haven't yet got a tree or decorated. For some reason I have found Christmas stressful forever whether I'm organised for it or not...

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Copperblack · 22/11/2020 07:03

I have similar feelings. This year I printed off a list for my teens with quite specific guidelines - 2 ideas 100-150, 6 things fit under £50 and 10 things for around £10 - I can then choose from the list and know they will get some things they like. ( I ll get one big, one medium, a few smaller and some bits I’ve chosen). It can help if you are open and realistic with the older ones.

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Chailatte20 · 22/11/2020 07:05

Your teenager is being incredibly self absorbed asking for an expensive coat in the middle of a pandemic and economic crisis. Everyone needs to adjust their expectations and realise that your situation might change overnight.

As pp have said:

  • set budget per child
  • ask each child for list
  • order online asap for click & collect or deliveries
  • cut down additional gifts for others
  • add Christmas Dinner items to your weekly shop. Buy your frozen turkey or meat now & freeze.
  • ask your kids what they want to do /eat over Christmas and get them involved in the planning
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Chailatte20 · 22/11/2020 07:20

Have a look on the Christmas bargain thread for discounts and codes. I've saved a fortune on gifts over the past few years.

Sorry I can't link, just copy the thread title in to the search box and it will come up.

Thread 21 - the one where we all try to not eat all the hotel chocolat

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Viv0321 · 22/11/2020 11:35

Take it in steps

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Ginandplatonic · 22/11/2020 11:38

Your teenager is being incredibly self absorbed asking for an expensive coat in the middle of a pandemic and economic crisis.

They are just being a teenager. Self-absorbed is in the job description.

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Someonesayroadtrip · 22/11/2020 12:14

I think you just make clear that they need to be realistic. I would hope you're not considering buying something that costs more than your monthly salary. Give them money and they can save towards it and just get some small bits and bobs. Ask the others to write lists.

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