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AIBU?

to want to open the back door and the windows for a couple of hours in the morning this time of year?

158 replies

SweetAlmondOil · 27/10/2020 13:20

My OH (we don't live together) says I'm obsessed with fresh air and wishes I didn't open the back door and most of the windows every morning for a couple of hours when the weather is no longer mild as it is in the summer. He's quite happy to open a window for ten minutes and that's it. When I stay at his I wish he did get more fresh air in but it's his place and he can do as he pleases of course.

I like to get fresh air in the house in the morning, especially since I have three dogs (the place - I've often been told - does NOT smell of dogs. Possibly because there is no carpet in the house and the dogs are not allowed on the beds and because of the above window opening!) and believe it's important to get rid of the overnight, stale air and also try to discourage mould/condensation, bacteria, etc. linked to not opening windows for long enough, often enough.

The heating isn't on when the door and the windows are open but comes on afterwards. I do admit that in between me closing everything and the place getting warm it takes a little while because the fresh air is cooler than the air that was in the house. So I was wondering whether IABU.

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

559 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
27%
You are NOT being unreasonable
73%
Lockheart · 27/10/2020 13:22

Personally I wouldn't leave doors and windows open for a couple of hours in the winter. Even ten minutes is pushing it.

In the summer my windows are rarely shut but I hate being cold so don't open them often in the winter.

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Unicornsdosparkle · 27/10/2020 13:22

I'm the same. Whatever the weather the windows will always be open. Not always the back door for as long but I live that fresh crisp air.

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Hollyhocksarenotmessy · 27/10/2020 13:23

Not unreasonable. It's not an old wives tale, houses really do need a daily airing to avoid problems with mould, condensation and general mustiness/smell.

Also, your house, your rules.

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gamerchick · 27/10/2020 13:24

I'm all for fresh air and windows get opened daily to freshen the room up. Even when it's bitterly cold they get opened for a little while.

I can't stand main doors being left open though. There's no need when windows do just as well

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StillRunningWithScissors · 27/10/2020 13:24

I think as it's your house, it's your call.

You're respectful of his decision to not do the same at your house, so he should be of you.

He's not paying the heating bill.

Also, I think airing out is a good idea based in having three dogs, also good to combat damp.

Crack on, I say (but I also don't feel the cold)

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Devilesko · 27/10/2020 13:24

Ours are open all morning and afternoon if it isn't too cold.
Then when the heating comes on it warms up quicker and costs less than warming up damp.
I don't make my bed either, take the duvet off put pillows close to the window and get plenty of air to the bed.
Then make it later when I close the windows.
I don't like being indoors though, it feels claustrophobic, but nothing i can do about it during covid. It feels like the walls are closing in if windows and doors aren't open.

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BackforGood · 27/10/2020 13:25

I haven't voted, as YANBU to want to do something I wouldn't do, but I think the idea of having doors and windows open for an hour in Winter a bit odd.

As you say about your OH though - what he does in his house is up to him and what you do in yours is up to you. Issue being if you stay over for a few few days at each others homes... if you go away together.... if you make the decision to move in together.

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0blio · 27/10/2020 13:25

Hmm, but it certainly isn't fresh or crisp where I am just now. I open my bedroom and bathroom windows for half an hour or so while I get up and ready in the morning but that's all. I like to be warm.

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PuppyFeet · 27/10/2020 13:25

I agree... I’d love to have doors and windows open every morning regardless of season but my partner looks at me horrified if the door is even ajar! I have managed to get the bedroom window open every night all year round... I take that as the compromise!

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EatDessertFirst · 27/10/2020 13:26

I'm with you 100%. I have to have the doors as windows open as much as possible but especially in the mornings as my house retains heat and feels really stuffy when I wake up.

I also have pets (three cats) and am paranoid of the house smelling 'catty' (I've also been told it doesn't).

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OverTheRainbow88 · 27/10/2020 13:26

I leave all our windows upstairs open all day everyday. Downstairs open until I go out!

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Bluntness100 · 27/10/2020 13:30

I’d be very cold and uncomfortable to open my windows and doors for a couple of hours. However the reason you’re not unreasonable is it’s your home and if this is what you wish to do then you should crack on.

Personally I’d think of guests ans their comfort though. It’s not going to cause a problem if you go a couple of days without doing it. On the other hand he can refuse to be there freezing his arse off.

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workhomesleeprepeat · 27/10/2020 13:33

I’d be freezing but it’s your house! If I had dogs I would prob do the same. Maybe not all the windows AND the back door, I might actually die of the cold 🥶

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flaviaritt · 27/10/2020 13:34

He’s a guest and he’s cold. I say close the windows or at least put the heating on.

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CremeEggThief · 27/10/2020 13:34

When I'm not work I have all the windows open at the same time with the heating off for a few hours. Even if it's-10°c outside, I still do it for an hour or two.

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Cabinfever10 · 27/10/2020 13:35

I leave the bathroom and kitchen windows open all night with all the doors except ds bedroom door open it creates a nice through draft that clears the stale air out. I'm 1st up in the morning and close the windows and turn the heating on (in the winter).
All windows are open in the summer.
Strangely enough I've never had a problem with mould or condensation

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NattyDiamondDoll · 27/10/2020 13:36

I open my windows all year round to air my house. Sometimes I even have them open with the heating on. Nothing worse than a house without fresh air.

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Armi · 27/10/2020 13:38

I fully air the house for about 20 minutes a day at this time of year (bedroom windows are always on the latch or open anyway). To be fair, it is cold and lots of people get really miserable when they get cold. I do it when I’m racing about, cleaning and tidying up so don’t feel cold. Perhaps you could suggest your partner does something active during the time you’re airing the house.

Obviously, it’s your house, so do what you like but I probably wouldn’t prop everything open for hours in this weather, if only because my house takes a lot of heating to get warm again and I want the people in my house to be comfortable.

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wannabebump · 27/10/2020 13:38

Your house, your rules. It's not like you don't have the heating on afterwards! I have bathroom and bedroom windows every day at some point, and every other window has the vent open 24/7. When cooking, the kitchen window is open as well, and the extractor fan comes on after the window is closed for a bit. Houses need airing!

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MeepleMe · 27/10/2020 13:39

I have a couple of windows open most of the time, certainly bedroom and bathroom and probably kitchen too, unless it's really wet outside. Houses definitely need ventilation. Crack on OP.

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shitinmyhandsandclap · 27/10/2020 13:39

@CremeEggThief

When I'm not work I have all the windows open at the same time with the heating off for a few hours. Even if it's-10°c outside, I still do it for an hour or two.

See I don't get this at all. Why be cold when you don't have to be?!
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Lockheart · 27/10/2020 13:40

I think mould and condensation are indications of damp, rather than unaired, rooms.

Despite opening windows rarely in winter, I don't have issues with condensation or mould - even in bathrooms or rooms where we dry laundry. But we do run the heating twice a day.

If your house is damp it's best to address the root cause rather than the symptoms. Plus trickle vents are your friend!

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unmarkedbythat · 27/10/2020 13:40

Not what I would do, but you can do as you please in your own house. If I regularly stayed somewhere this happened and it was a real issue for me I'd just stop staying there I suppose!

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catlovingdoctor · 27/10/2020 13:41

Yanbu at all, I hate stuffy rooms and have my bedroom window open virtually 24/7

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TheQueef · 27/10/2020 13:44

I like the back door open when I wash the floors of Hoover it stops me turning into a purple headed sweat monster.
Quilts over the banister in the morning, bedroom windows open a crack then downstairs to the litter trays!
I need the air after the trays Grin

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