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AIBU?

Where did she go?

63 replies

Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 19:26

Name changed for this

I have a 26 month old Dd and just wanted to check if her behaviour is normal ‘Terrible two’s’ type behaviour or not.
She used to be a fairly easy, happy, calm girl.
She’s sort of hyper the majority of the time, generally throws strops over the littlest things, many of which don’t even make sense. She’s really hard to get to nap or sleep and night. She spends a lot of the day if we’re inside just chucking her toys around, climbing on the sofa.
I make sure we’re out for walks with the dog most days or on her pushbike, seeing friends, shopping, park etc and she spends a lot of the time running in the garden.
She’s just completely non stop and I’m finding I’m thinking more and more about wanting to go back to work full time, just to get a break.
I’m feeling pretty overwhelmed and miserable at the moment.
Is this a normal level of activity and behaviour? How long does this last?

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Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 19:27

It seems that almost literally since she turned two, she changed!
Where did my girl go 🤷🏻‍♀️

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Lolwhat · 01/10/2020 19:29

Yabu for saying 26 months

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Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 19:32

@Lolwhat Yep, I hate that aswell, wasn’t sure what was better that or 2, 2 months..just over 2 🤷🏻‍♀️

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formerbabe · 01/10/2020 19:32

My ds was like this and my niece is like this too...literally non stop and not able at that age to concentrate on an activity or toy for longer than thirty seconds! Yes, I think work would be far easier than being at home all day with a boisterous toddler!

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Flippertyflapperslesley · 01/10/2020 19:35

Lovely first comment there for you. Surely people can say ages how they want! People are so intolerant these days...

My daughter was very similar to yours. It’s hard work and exhausting looking after a 26 month old (sorry 2 and a tiny bit year old!) . It sounds normal to me OP. I think by the time my daughter turned 3 years old/36 months she had come out the other side 😇.

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SummerHouse · 01/10/2020 19:35

Could just be a phase. Well yes it is definitely a phase unless she is heading off to uni throwing all her belongings around.

Your brilliant motherlyness shines through your post. Just keep doing what you are doing. You are like the restraint on a rollercoaster to your child. They will want to test you to see if you are sturdy enough but all they want is for you to hold firm.

Take breaks from her when you can, and watch her when she's sleeping. This always helps as a reminder of how you love her more than anything.

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user1498572889 · 01/10/2020 19:37

I’ve just been looking after my 2 and a half year old grand daughter for 5 days. OMG 😂 I had forgotten how full on they are from the minute they wake up till they go to sleep. Throwing toys concentration span of a flea. Crying at the slightest thing. Talking non stop. I’m bloody exhausted but I had so much fun.

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Lalaloveyou2020 · 01/10/2020 19:39

Could you do something like the video in the link below? It's extreme but god I want to build them for all my friends with toddlers!
amp.reddit.com/r/nextfuckinglevel/comments/ixl5lk/father_built_his_kid_a_climbing_wall_to_get_him/

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Lindy2 · 01/10/2020 19:39

Yabu for saying 26 months how helpful Hmm

She sounds a lot like my daughter at 2. It's exhausting. I was at work part time and I used to joke that I went to work for a rest (it wasn't actually a joke).

I did work out over time though that the behaviour got harder if she was tired or hungry. Often when she was tired she would actually speed up and get more active when actually she really needed to rest. Dropping some of the physical activity, that I thought she needed, actually helped calm her a bit as did regular healthy snacks.

It was still hard but as she got older it did improve and get easier. 2 is a very challenging age for lots of parents.

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Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 19:41

@formerbabe I feel guilty for effectively wanting to escape all day, but work was nothing compared to some of the harder days!

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Kanaloa · 01/10/2020 19:41

I think for a just turned 2 year old this is pretty normal. They seem to have bags of energy at all times. Is it possible to get a day or two at nursery so you’re getting a bit of a break? I do understand though, it feels like it will go on forever but it does stop. I think when they’re very small with limited language it can be so frustrating for them and you.

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Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 19:42

@Flippertyflapperslesley I know 🙄not helpful is it.

That’s reassuring..I have until around next summer then, she’s like one of those batteries that needs switching off sometimes, it gets mental..!

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Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 19:43

@Flippertyflapperslesley *Battery bunnies

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OnlyFoolsnMothers · 01/10/2020 19:44

Yep my daughter was/ is this!!! Only recently started getting better now shes 3- focuses a little more on an activity be it a puzzle or colouring.
I actually preferred just to be out the house all the time we could during the 2s.
I do think too many toys around them doesn’t help, I find it’s better to have less distractions when we try and play with 1 but it’s never easy. Beginning of lockdown we played with every toy in her room, I checked my watch and it’s had been 20mins.....Hmm

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Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 19:46

@SummerHouse Your comment made me feel weepy then 💐

That’s the thing I feel like she’s really starting to push boundaries now and I’m not stew how to approach it as she throws the mother of all fits! So you’d start imposing discipline more now/being firmer?

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toomuchpeppapig · 01/10/2020 19:47

I have zero advice for you, I'm just desperately hoping that this isn't going to happen to my DS when he turns 2 next week as I don't think I could cope with that plus my nearly 1 year old. Confused

Hopefully it is a passing phase and she'll be back to her usual delightful self soon for you.

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Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 19:47

@user1498572889 It’s complete madness isn’t it?
My mum adores her but says we didn’t all have that much energy..unless she’s just forgotten..!

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Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 19:51

It just seemed to all come pretty much at once..!
I asked because I wonder at times if it’s adhd or is just toddler life.
The recent strops and crying gets really difficult..she’s strong, man! 🙈but then the next minute she’ll be cuddling up, it’s like some severe case of pmt at times!

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Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 19:53

@Lalaloveyou2020 😂

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Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 19:56

@Lindy2 Oh for sure, it really ramps up if she’s tired so I’ve always tried really hard to stick to her routine. She’s just such an active child, half the time it takes forever to get her to nap.

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anorangeaday · 01/10/2020 19:56

It sounds a lot like the terrible 2’s, my DD was 3 in April, she’s still not out of them really

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Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 19:58

@Kanaloa I’ve been looking into nurseries this week as I really feel we need that little break now! Even if only a couple of mornings per week.
If she doesn’t nap and then won’t sleep at bedtime until late, the days are so long!

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Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 20:01

@OnlyFoolsnMothers It’s madness isn’t it, yeah we like to get in the garden for her to improvise and play with stones and mud etc or I set out some things on the carpet for her in the morning to give her an idea of what she ‘Might’ like to play with..otherwise every single thing gets thrown around.

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Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 20:02

@toomuchpeppapig Sorry to worry you! It’s probably just my dd 😂🤷🏻‍♀️

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Tantrumcity · 01/10/2020 20:04

@anorangeaday I suppose it’s the crying and tantrums that are the hardest. Previous lovely days and lunches out we used to enjoy, I’m starting to dread.
I never know whether to cuddle her through the upset or be stronger/firmer with her..she’s becoming very demanding and stubborn!

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