Wasn't sure where to post this so decided to do it here for traffic..
I'm starting to wonder if there's something wrong with me as I don't feel any strong feelings/emotions and don't seem to be like others.
I never worry, get stressed or anxious.. I have the attitude if I can't change it then there's no point stressing and if I can change then it'll be fixed and all be alright.
I was discussing my job with a family member the other week (I work with traumatised children) and they asked how I coped, my mum chipped in and said because she doesn't have a heart that's how. And I've had similar comments before. I'm not nasty or horrible.. I'll go out my way to help anyone but things don't phase me. I don't lie awake at night because of the things I hear in my job no matter how horrendous they may be. My goal is to be the adult that child can trust and help them to turn their lives around.. if I do that great, If I can't then I done my best you can't help everyone. I get given the worst cases at work.. I can literally take any amount of verbal or physical abuse they throw at me and it never bothers me at all, even people I work with question how I manage it.. it never stirs any kind of emotion in me.
Recently me and my sister experienced a really traumatic event.. my sister is really struggling having nightmares and having counselling to cope.. It hasn't effected me.. I feel like it's over and I've moved on and I know people say that it can be delayed but I had a traumatic experience as a teen and that never phased me either.
I don't have strong emotional connections to people. I'm married but I can't say that Im overwhelmed with love for my husband or ever have been.. I enjoy his company. We get on amazingly and have a nice life, I support him fully and I'm protective of him.. but if he walked out on me tomorrow I don't think I'd bat an eyelid.. same with family I'm really close to my family and I see them a lot and get on well but not seeing people for months during lockdown didn't bother me at all.. whereas I had my mum and sister crying down the phone daily.
However on the flip side I have 2 boys and I love them intensely.. I'm affectionate and spend every minute I have with them.. my husband said I'm like a completely different person with them than with anyone else. I never hug or kiss anyone and I hate it when people try and hug me.. my husband is the exception.. but I had to learn to be that way with him, it didn't come naturally. The only time I feel any upset/sadness/strong emotions is with/for them.. up until they were born (oldest is 2.5) I can honestly say I had never felt any of the emotions I've felt towards them.
Is this completely abnormal.. or are others similar to me.. I only ask because I'm always told I'm not normal.. no ones ever said don't worry I get you..
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AIBU?
Am I normal?
76 replies
gingerlace · 29/09/2020 21:10
OP posts:
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