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To think parents will begin to lie

(272 Posts)
Settleandcalm Fri 18-Sep-20 01:38:22

DD has a slight temp for one day, as a result doing the right thing we eventually got the test, and a veeeery long time later the results. The test was awful making her vomit over herself, the wait for my older children who are already struggling being in and out of school also awful. But it was the right thing to do.

BUT. Would I put her through that test every 3 weeks which is the average she got a temp:cough last year? No. Can I afford to lose my job? No. I will do the right thing but I have an utter fear over it.

But I suppose I wonder how long it will take parents to start slipping back to the “watch and see” version of illness. If it’s just a bit of a temp on one day... just a bit of a cough... maybe give them a day and see if they are fine, rather than fight for a test or isolate The whole family for 14 days.

There are already kids in school coughing and I know only us and one other family has tested, so perhaps, because of the testing fiasco and inconsistent rules people are already starting to lie?

OP’s posts: |
Pixxie7 Fri 18-Sep-20 02:07:31

I think your probably right, it doesn’t make it right though.

TableFlowerss Fri 18-Sep-20 02:10:43

The problem is it’s hard to hide a cough and I think school would be on the phone if the DC started coughing noticeably.

A temp with no other symptoms would be easier to get away with as parents could give them paracetamol to bring it down.

Hamm87 Fri 18-Sep-20 02:11:34

They are at my ds school they also just not telling the school if its over the weekend i cannot afford to keep going off work i have been off since last Friday as ds came home from school with fever, then me Sunday spoke to a group of parents and everyone had sent there kids in ill that week so we have done tests waiting for results, I was sick, child was sick but if I have to test every few weeks I will because I refuse to put other families at risk. Wish everyone thought that way

Lilybet1980 Fri 18-Sep-20 02:14:42

TableFlowerss

The problem is it’s hard to hide a cough and I think school would be on the phone if the DC started coughing noticeably.

A temp with no other symptoms would be easier to get away with as parents could give them paracetamol to bring it down.

This is exactly why some schools are taking temperatures at lunchtime.

Torvean32 Fri 18-Sep-20 02:31:26

Settleandcalm

DD has a slight temp for one day, as a result doing the right thing we eventually got the test, and a veeeery long time later the results. The test was awful making her vomit over herself, the wait for my older children who are already struggling being in and out of school also awful. But it was the right thing to do.

BUT. Would I put her through that test every 3 weeks which is the average she got a temp:cough last year? No. Can I afford to lose my job? No. I will do the right thing but I have an utter fear over it.

But I suppose I wonder how long it will take parents to start slipping back to the “watch and see” version of illness. If it’s just a bit of a temp on one day... just a bit of a cough... maybe give them a day and see if they are fine, rather than fight for a test or isolate The whole family for 14 days.

There are already kids in school coughing and I know only us and one other family has tested, so perhaps, because of the testing fiasco and inconsistent rules people are already starting to lie?

Out of interest what's a slight temperature, and how long did it last?

Catsup Fri 18-Sep-20 02:36:51

To be honest I think it's only going to get worse in that respect. The general winter cough/cold season is fast approaching, and now furlough isn't subsidising businesses how long will it take before people with families (especially larger ones) start getting pulled up on time off for testing which is becoming an increasing long waiting list? Plus testing is only valid on the day its done, so what happens when people isolate due to guidelines based on child A's test, and then it comes back negative, but then child B exhibts symptoms, and the following week child C, or more? I worry employers are going to clamp down on this as X amount of sickness leave on record eventually, and more people feeling they have to gamble on it not being covid and still go into work/send kids to school and taking risks.

TableFlowerss Fri 18-Sep-20 02:37:40

@Lilybet1980

God, do schools go that far?!

Susannahmoody Fri 18-Sep-20 02:37:48

Yup, people will lie

Topseyt Fri 18-Sep-20 02:51:17

I think you are right. People will lie because their backs will be up against the wall and they will have no choice. Their employers just won't put up with the continued regular absences for all that long.

The problem will be particularly acute for those with primary school aged children as they are generally the age group who are too young to be left at home alone.

I'm not convinced I wouldn't lie myself. However, I no longer have school aged children so it won't be a dilemma I will face. That is honestly a relief right now.

BlackberrySky Fri 18-Sep-20 03:25:35

Yes, this will definitely happen.

TitsOutForHarambe Fri 18-Sep-20 04:20:21

Yes, of course they will. Loads of people are going to do this. Times are really tough at the moment and the people who are lucky enough to still have jobs to go to are not going to want to risk losing them by being off everytime any member of their family has symptoms.

IHateCoronavirus Fri 18-Sep-20 04:33:40

They will lie for sure, I spent last Christmas with a vomiting bug thanks to one particular mother who was so insistent her daughter’s vomiting was down to a nasal drip, she ended up successfully getting a drs note.
Her little darling not to miss out on her first nativity! She made it a long with only 8 other children, where were the others? At home newly vommiting! angry
Some people only look out for number one, regardless of the consequences.

Goosefoot Fri 18-Sep-20 04:34:27

Yes. And people will push the age they leave kids alone too, maybe more than send them sick. This would probably be ok to some extent - back in the 70s and 80s kids stayed home a lone a lot younger - but it's really not ideal and in some cases it may happen with children who really are too young.

I also think there may end up being informal childcare exchanges, which kind of buggers the isolating thing.

But you can't have a whole society based on what amounts to state childcare and two-income families and think that somehow you can just change that without putting some supports in place. What we've seen is that rather like the supply chain, our domestic/work arrangements in many nations are not very resilient.

IHateCoronavirus Fri 18-Sep-20 04:35:07

*Her little darling WAS not going to miss out!

Sorry I’m half asleep!

WeMarchOn Fri 18-Sep-20 04:36:48

@TableFlowerss ours every child has their temp taken before entry in the morning

IHateCoronavirus Fri 18-Sep-20 04:49:43

WeMarchOn

*@TableFlowerss* ours every child has their temp taken before entry in the morning

Ours too, but that won’t prevent those who are determined dosing their child with Calpol first to bring their temperature down!

Witchend Fri 18-Sep-20 05:06:58

And what they don't see is if too many people do that it will inevitably lead to the schools closing again.

RemyHadley Fri 18-Sep-20 06:46:24

Of course people will lie. Of course they shouldn’t, but people need to work.

It was always obvious that school children would get colds /coughs/temperatures like they normally do, and that the testing technology we have just isn’t good enough to get them back to school quickly.

We’re home educating rather than have our eldest in and out of school constantly.

LadyofTheManners Fri 18-Sep-20 06:52:28

This is where the system falls down

All parents all know that one child whose family use the school as free childcare and who, inevitably, comes into school at least twice a year then is sent home because they've puked everywhere.
There will always be ignorant parents who think the rules don't apply to them and their offspring, same as with those who don't treat nits and leave the class on an never ending cycle of treating their whole family.
There are also those who are too scared of losing their jobs if they go out for a fortnight, especially of it's going to be regular during winter.
The only way they can control this as for sure the outbreaks will continue and probably start in schools is to test all kids once a fortnight (staggered by area and school) in school. But they are unlikely as a) it would cost too much, b) they can't handle testing as is and c) the same as teachers can no longer have classes checked for nits there would be people complaining of children's rights.

IdblowJonSnow Fri 18-Sep-20 07:00:50

Several kids in my child's year have gone to school with coughs and colds this week. School were fine with it. Then my dd got it and we took her temperature every morning, and, as it was 36, sent her in. No other symptoms.
I don't think you can keep them off for just a mild cough and cold. If others did then I would but seems pointless when all the others go in with it.
I hope others check temp regularly but doubt many do.

HathorX Fri 18-Sep-20 07:05:29

yanbu! Coughs are often an innocent result of a runny nose common cold - so it is easy to claim it is just a regular cold (so if your child starts coming down with a cold Friday afternoon, is sick at the weekend, they could easily be in the coughing innocently phase on Monday). I'm sympathetic to people who need to work and are convinced their kids can't possibly have caught covid and so send them to school. Working parents have been in a tough spot since March, and when your kids are well enough to be in school, having missed months and months of regular education, the temptation to send them in must be very strong.

thewinkingprawn Fri 18-Sep-20 07:09:34

The problem is that they get a temperature for anything and everything, couple that with not having been in school for nearly 6 months and immune systems are bound to be lower. Our area has such low cases that I would say on balance it’s highly unlikely to be Covid and more likely to be a cold that is going around (entirely normal at this time of year). We simply cannot keep yo yo ing our kids in and out for every normal childhood illness ‘just in case’ not wasting scarce NHS resources ‘just in case’. Frankly I would absolutely send my child if it’s that or lose my job. Call me selfish but I honestly cannot imagine anyone in the same situation where they could not afford to put food on the table if they lost their job due to being off yet again wouldn’t do the same. It’s easy to sit here if you don’t work or if you have a secure job where they genuinely don’t care if you are home again but for most people in the real world that is simply not the case.

Iamnotthe1 Fri 18-Sep-20 07:12:52

Of course some parents will. That's something schools see in normal times:
"No, he's not been sick since Saturday,"
"We took him to the doctors and it's fine,"
Etc.
The child normally reveals the truth on their own within thirty minutes of being back in the classroom.

With Covid-19, it won't be lying about symptoms so much: it'll be lying about having them tested. This is one of the major issues with the DfE telling schools that they cannot ask for proof of a negative test.

Many parents will behave responsibly and do what they should, even at cost to themselves. However, some will not.

Ontheroadtorecovery Fri 18-Sep-20 07:12:52

My ds got a cough after having a heavy cold he caught when he went back. As the cough was bad I had him tested. I was 99% he would be negative but I wouldn't forgive myself for taking a risk and getting it wrong

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