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AIBU?

To think this is quite an antisocial way for neighbours to behave?

47 replies

vanitythynameisnotwoman · 12/08/2020 18:28

I moved just after moves were made "allowed" again at the end of May into a little terrace in a cul-de-sac in the city I work in. It's really friendly, I've met pretty much everyone that lives here and they seem like great neighbours. However there are a couple of guys living over the road who sit out the front of their house chatting until between 12 and 2am every night. It's a narrow road so they are less than 10m from my pillow, I'm wearing earplugs so they don't always wake me but if I do wake I can't get back to sleep. I'm early-to-bed and I don't expect them to be quiet from when I want to to go to bed but is this not a bit late and antisocial? One of them works as a taxi driver, the other I'm not sure - but I have a fairly stressful full time job and being awake for an hour or two nightly is starting to damage my concentration and wellbeing. They are sometimes joined by another (female) neighbour. Because the houses are small it's quite normal to sit out the front in the day or evening.

I'm not sure how I feel about asking them to be quiet as I'm a woman living alone and I think they are often under the influence (weed rather than alcohol) in the night.

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Aquamarine1029 · 12/08/2020 18:30

Before confronting them I would try some white noise first to see if that solves your problem.

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Toilenstripes · 12/08/2020 18:35

The cool weather will soon drive them inside. We live in terraced housing in a popular neighbourhood and in the summer months the streets and gardens are teeming with neighbours and friends. After September we don’t see or hear them until the following May/June.

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user12345796 · 12/08/2020 18:37

That's so true you probably only have another fortnight of this. Think again next spring

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saltycat · 12/08/2020 18:38

Have you got a back bedroom that you could use? I don't know the setup of your house, so it's just a suggestion.

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slipperywhensparticus · 12/08/2020 18:38

Are they just talking?

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DundeeDiva · 12/08/2020 18:41

I'm a really light sleeper OP so I sympathise but have to say I'd agree with the previous posters here. You're only likely to have a few weeks more of this before it becomes too cold. In the interest of new neighbourly relations I'd go with ear plugs and white noise for now!

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Wilsonscaresme · 12/08/2020 18:44

I would -

Use a back bedroom if poss.

Use white noise.

Make friends with them, you never know when you need help Grin

They probably go in each others houses in the winter to get stoned socialise.

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vanitythynameisnotwoman · 12/08/2020 18:44

That's true - roll on Autumn eh?!
Yes just talking/laughing but by 1-2am it's pretty quiet out and so it carries much more and just goes on for so long!

My back bedroom doesn't have a bed in - it has lots of boxes and a desk. Else I'd definitely move in there!

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Aquamarine1029 · 12/08/2020 18:48

Move the boxes and the desk into the bedroom you're using now, and switch rooms.

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Sunrise234 · 12/08/2020 18:49

This would really annoy me but as others have said it's not long until the bad weather now.
But I can't see why you can't move into your back bedroom seeing as it only has stuff in it and not anyone sleeping in there.

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TheDoctorDances · 12/08/2020 18:50

Decent earplugs are worth their weight in gold, I’d recommend the Mack’s purple ones. Like other posters said, they’ll be inside once the summer is over. Otherwise clear the boxes and move the bed!

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SissySpacekAteMyHamster · 12/08/2020 18:51

At least its a decent burglar deterrent!

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vanitythynameisnotwoman · 12/08/2020 18:58

Mainly the not swapping the rooms round is because I have a wooden bed frame that had to be built in the room, and am physically disabled (irrelevant to the post so not included) - can just manage the stairs - so I wouldn't stand a chance! I'll look into those earplugs though - I just by foam ones from Boots - but that might be a perfect solution.

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Wilsonscaresme · 12/08/2020 19:08

I have to sleep on the sofa sometimes due to noise, its a pain.

Earplugs- I use the wax ones from Boots & Wilko.

You roll them until they are warm, then they mould to the shape of your ear and dont fall out.

A whole earplug is a bit big, you have to break a bit off Smile

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cringeworthit · 12/08/2020 19:11

It won't be long before the weather's shit and they go back indoors.

Hereabouts all we have on our local fb page is people complaining about the noise and dust from harvesting, and the tractors and combine harvesters clogging up the roads. That's life.

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Wilsonscaresme · 12/08/2020 19:13

@TheDoctorDances - I just looked up your earplug recommendation, as I do like to try good ones, just to let you know they look the same as the Wilko ones which are about £2.00, in case you like a bargain!

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FizzAfterSix · 12/08/2020 19:14

The Muffles wax ones from Boots are also good.

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user1471538283 · 12/08/2020 19:20

This would drive me mad. It might help short term if you have a fan on to create white noise and ear plugs. It's so inconsiderate

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IncrediblySadToo · 12/08/2020 19:29

It's inconsiderate if they know it wakes you, if they don't it's not really.

Over the Autumn/Winter I'd try to get to know them a bit better so that by next spring/summer you don't feel so wary of asking them to take it elsewhere

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testingtesting101 · 12/08/2020 19:50
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vanitythynameisnotwoman · 12/08/2020 19:50

@IncrediblySadToo

It's inconsiderate if they know it wakes you, if they don't it's not really.

Over the Autumn/Winter I'd try to get to know them a bit better so that by next spring/summer you don't feel so wary of asking them to take it elsewhere

This is really wise - thank you. It's been such a good move for me in other ways I do hope I'll know them better by next year.

I thought about buying a fan and decided not to as the weather will just change! But it may double as white noise so I'll have a rethink on that.
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MikeUniformMike · 12/08/2020 19:55

I'd ask them to move.
I've had people chatting in the street less than 2m away from my desk when wfh. Windows not open but noise quite noticeable.
I asked them to move

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CottonSock · 12/08/2020 19:56

Def get silicone ear Plugs. I'm an awful sleeper so have tried all of them!

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MikeUniformMike · 12/08/2020 19:57

The other one is people stopping and leaning against the wall to make a phone call on speakerphone, or people who think it is ok to shout to someone 20 m away. It is in broad daylight but sounds like a riot is going on.

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GlasgowsGreen · 12/08/2020 20:14

You can get free white noise apps. I listen to waves or rain but some of them have fan noise too.

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