I had a very toxic ex-friend, she is a gossip, a liar and frankly emotionally manipulative. I removed her from my life after a lot of therapy, as did several other people. I will call her Claire.
We have a mutual friends who are a couple.
Let’s call the couple Sally and Victoria. Claire has known them longer and knows Sally better than she knows Victoria.
Sally and Victoria got married last year but before they got married they broke up for a little while. I didn’t know why and didn’t ask because I didn’t know them well enough. Claire had Sally over to crash on her couch and naturally the story came out.
Victoria had been violent toward Sally for several years but it had escalated. Claire tried to help Sally by demanding she leave and made things very difficult for her socially. All the while shouting about how she was very supportive and why it all hurt her the most.
Anyway, I didn’t ask her why they had broken up but knew Sally was very upset and just wished them the best. It wasn’t my place to know as we aren’t that close. Immediately I said that, Claire was telling me about Victoria being an abuser and she has treated Sally terribly for years.
Anyway, they get married (I didn’t go, because I don’t know them well enough or for long enough) and are doing ok. Victoria talks a lot about getting therapy and how it is helping their marriage. She doesn’t mention what the therapy is for but she says she is going 3x a week. They both agree it is life changing.
Anyway Claire in the meantime out of nowhere, after we had been for drinks with them, tells me - without me asking - about a particularly gruesome incident and injury that occurred because of this domestic violence - the reason they broke up.
It is shocking and harrowing. I believe this particular story to be true, as it is consistent with medical treatment Sally told me she received at around the same time.
They have no idea I know. Victoria doesn’t know that Claire knows.
Since then I have moved on from the friendship with Claire but it turns out she has relayed this awful tale to a number of people in our circle and the story is spreading within the industry that Victoria works.
WIBU to contact Sally to make her aware that her safety has been compromised?
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AIBU?
about this former toxic friend endangering my new friend?
42 replies
BlackBucketOfCheese · 12/07/2020 22:30
OP posts:
Am I being unreasonable?
36 votes. Final results.
POLL
You are being unreasonable
31%
You are NOT being unreasonable
69%
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