Okay so first off, I want to say that I struggle with intrusive thoughts and catastrophic thinking due to my OCD and being in lockdown with so much time to think has not put me in a great place - I am overthinking any little scenario or memory that comes into my head.
So basically, a little while back I had a drunken fumble with a friend- the whole incident was extremely rash and start to finish lasted no more than 2 or 3 minutes. We were both drunk and had hooked up once before, but during this particular fumble, he did something that I wasn't entirely crazy about but I didn't stop him - as I said, it was just a very drunk and rash encounter but I remember at the time feeling like "ugh, just let him finish what he's doing" even though I felt like a little bit grossed out and uncomfortable about the whole thing. He did say after the fact, "I'm not sure if you were enjoying that or not!"
I am by no means blaming him - he is not a mind reader, I just went along with it and we were both under the influence of alcohol but the past few days I cannot stop thinking about it. As I said, I am overthinking everything at the moment so I suppose I am just posting this in the hopes that other people will tell me that it was just a bad drunken mistake and we all make them!
(Sorry, I feel like I've just totally waffled here - my head is a bit scrambled)
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To feel a bit weird about this sexual encounter
57 replies
Jellyoctopus · 06/07/2020 23:26
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