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DH insisted I come shopping and then basically chinned me off..

(139 Posts)
Emyem Sat 04-Jul-20 13:56:41

DH announced a couple of days ago that we're all getting the train to nearby shopping district today with his eldest two to go shopping for birthday presents.

He said he wanted himself, me and our two to go, collect the older kids then gets the train.

Yesterday he then asks If my DM would mind minding our two for a couple of hours so we can go without the pram.

DM jumped at the chance as she hasn't seen much of the babies since lockdown.

We collect his eldest and get the train to the shopping district and within 5 minutes of arriving he tells me to go off and do my own thing for a bit, bare in mind I didn't need anything and only came because he insisted.

If he wanted to spend some time with the eldest alone then why insist we, and then I, come in the first place.

He wanted me to wander round aimlessly until they had finished shopping then to meet back up.

I think it was rude and I'm pissed off at having wasted my day when in all honesty I would've rather stayed home in the first place and only came because he asked me to.

I'm having a sulk coffee now and feel like getting the train home and leaving him to it. I don't want to meet back up with him because I'm in a foul mood and don't want his kids to pick up on it.


OP’s posts: |
TinyPigeon Sat 04-Jul-20 13:58:19

Do you have a birthday coming up?

Justmuddlingalong Sat 04-Jul-20 13:58:54

I'd bugger off home on the train too. 💐

GinDaddyRedux Sat 04-Jul-20 13:59:17


Randomness12 Sat 04-Jul-20 13:59:23

YANBU that’s really shit of him. I’d meet up as planned for the sake of his kids, then when you get home ask him exactly he needed to drag you along to ditch you!

Emyem Sat 04-Jul-20 14:00:25

I don't have a birthday coming up no, one of his other kids have.

Before anybody wonders whether I was intruding I want to reiterate again that me coming was entirely his idea

OP’s posts: |
purplecorkheart Sat 04-Jul-20 14:01:04

Unless he is getting you a surprise of some sort then he is out of order.

FishyMcFishyfingersFace Sat 04-Jul-20 14:02:58

Go home, send him a text telling him you are going if you want to. Don't let him push you around next time he insists on something like this.

If I were you I'd buy myself something nice to have for yourself while you have the house to yourself, then get dh to pick up your younger dcs on his way home so you don't need to interrupt your relaxing afternoon.

Andahelterskelterroundmylittle Sat 04-Jul-20 14:05:05

Get shopping or head home.. downright rude

Widdlywoo2u Sat 04-Jul-20 14:09:06

Maybe he’s getting you something nice as a surprise?

MaeDanvers Sat 04-Jul-20 14:09:11

Maybe he is buying you a present? Would that be the sort of thing he might do?

romeolovedjulliet Sat 04-Jul-20 14:09:12

i'd have gone home, what an idiot.

Emyem Sat 04-Jul-20 14:09:32

He's definitely not buying me a present

OP’s posts: |
CuppaZa Sat 04-Jul-20 14:11:00

I’d go straight home if that was me. Cheeky fucker

3cats Sat 04-Jul-20 14:11:27

That's really rude. I'd be annoyed as heck too.

StuffThem Sat 04-Jul-20 14:12:15

I would either go for the nicest lunch/cake/look around a park or museum that i could find that I would really enjoy, or go home if I'd prefer that. I'd definitely be suiting myself not him.

MaltbyMaeve Sat 04-Jul-20 14:13:31

Why don’t you just go home?

Thatnameistaken Sat 04-Jul-20 14:13:37

Yup, I'd be on the next train home and enjoy a relaxing afternoon with a book.

Liveandforget Sat 04-Jul-20 14:14:49

Are there other issues in your marriage? He sounds inconsiderate of your time, patronising (shooing you away), and rude.

I bet he's spending hugely on his dc and doesn't want you to know.

sitckmansladylove Sat 04-Jul-20 14:15:13

I would go home. Unless he feels you needed to get out of the house (ie a cheering up but then he would spend the day with you??) Very strange

billy1966 Sat 04-Jul-20 14:15:45

Head off home. Twat.

I hate shopping and I loathe shopping centres.

PinkiOcelot Sat 04-Jul-20 14:15:45

I’d be away home.

MarkRuffaloCrumble Sat 04-Jul-20 14:20:32

Unless he is getting you a surprise of some sort then he is out of order.

But then why insist OP comes at all? Perfect opportunity to take the elder ones out for the day and buy OP a surprise rather than drag her along and then ditch her!

CanaryFish Sat 04-Jul-20 14:20:48

Is he trying to subtly get you to buy the kids a surprise?? Was he trying to give you a “day off” because if you were home without the kids you’d end up doing housework? Maybe he genuinely thinks he’s giving you a fun afternoon of looking around the shops with kids in tow or something. I’d be inclined to ring him and say you’re gonna head home now unless there was something specific he needed you to wait for (and then it’s up to you if it’s worth sticking around for )

StoneCold316 Sat 04-Jul-20 14:22:45

Just go home if you don’t want to be there. I would

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