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to be a bit upset by this gift?

(245 Posts)
thisusernameismine Thu 02-Jul-20 12:26:01

I've left my job after over ten years and my boss is giving me a £1k budget with an upmarket wine merchant as a leaving present. I stopped drinking in Jan but unfortunately have gone a bit back into it over lockdown - I am determined to get back on track especially as I'm now jobless and mum to a toddler! It was common knowledge I wasn't drinking anymore at the start of the year and I've mentioned more recently how bad it is for my head. I mentioned the wine merchant is upmarket as he only sells posh stuff which is wasted on me anyway!

Do I say I cannot use this gift?! I've spoken to the wine merchant (mutual contact) and he's absolutely fine to not take the budget.

Just don't know how to give the gift 'back' 😭

OP’s posts: |
recededpronunciation Thu 02-Jul-20 12:29:27

I’m a bit gobsmacked at a £1K leaving gift after ten years - clearly i worked in the wrong industry! But that aside it would be a rubbish gift for me as I’m tea-total.

gutentag1 Thu 02-Jul-20 12:34:21

I'd spend it all on a selection of lovely wines for family and friends. That's birthdays/Christmas sorted for year or two!

MatildaTheCat Thu 02-Jul-20 12:34:46

You say, ‘Dear Boss, I’m overwhelmed by your generosity but I probably didn’t mention to you that I actually stopped drinking a while back for health reasons. I hate to sound ungrateful or cheeky but if I could have vouchers for x instead that would be absolutely wonderful. Thanks again.’

peppermintteadrinker Thu 02-Jul-20 12:35:43

I'd buy some stuff that are investment and sell em ina few years. Treat as savings account!

LochJessMonster Thu 02-Jul-20 12:36:51

Buy wine and keep it for presents, or sell it?

vodkaredbullgirl Thu 02-Jul-20 12:37:25

shock 1k leaving present, not good that its for a wine merchant.

Nottherealslimshady Thu 02-Jul-20 12:37:46

Id stock up for presents and stuff

starrynight87 Thu 02-Jul-20 12:37:58

Wow. One thousand pounds!!

dontgobaconmyheart Thu 02-Jul-20 12:38:35

A 1k leaving gift is obscene. What on earth fo you do for a living OP?!

I think it depends, were you hoping to get something else instead or just to say no gift is fine? (because it is, who needs 1k worth of anything just for exiting a job).

If the latter I'd just politely say I no longer drink and could it be cancelled. Otherwise just regift it OP, buy some nice champagne and dole it out as gifts throughout the year for days, anniversaries, celebrations. Or just dole it out. It's just a gesture from an employer, not a personalised intimate gift so it would be a shame to leave on awkward terms. I don't think you can expect colleagues to keep up with changes in your drinking habits, and saying it's 'bad for your head's is easily translatable as 'I'm drinking again and had a few last night but regret it afterwards'.

Murraygoldberg Thu 02-Jul-20 12:38:45

£1000 is a huge amount as a leaving present. I would be concerned if you turned it down it would be considered ungrateful and you get a vase instead!

Raindroplet Thu 02-Jul-20 12:40:21

Just accept it. I wouldn't expect anything if I left a job. I was being paid for a service not volunteering.
If you don't like it then pass it on.

OpenWheelRace Thu 02-Jul-20 12:40:41

Stock up on gifts, use the money saved to buy yourself something.

Note that it is highly unlikely to be costing the company £1k if its with a contact, so asking for the money in another form, even vouchers, is probably not ideal

OpenWheelRace Thu 02-Jul-20 12:41:29

And yes yes to the PPs who have said it won't look good to reject it.
Accept graciously and regift.

WhatWouldPennyDo Thu 02-Jul-20 12:42:16

Buy for investment purposes, sell on in due course. Or spend some for wine for when you host people, and invest the rest.

What a generous gift!

Oliversmumsarmy Thu 02-Jul-20 12:42:54

Welcome to being a non drinker and the gifts of wine and booze of all types that come with it.

I have also never smoked in my life and was given an ashtray by virtually everyone for my 21st.

Are you sure your boss didn’t have a freebie/discount with the wine supplier and pocketed the rest of the whip round money.

MinorArcana Thu 02-Jul-20 12:43:58

I’d stock up on a selection of wines for presents for family / friends.

TheSmallClangerWhistlesAgain Thu 02-Jul-20 12:46:23

Have you got a wedding or a big party coming up in the next year? It could be an absolute godsend if you have.

Thisismytimetoshine Thu 02-Jul-20 12:48:39

What do you mean by "I've spoken to the wine merchant and he's absolutely fine to not take the budget"? Shouldn't you speak to your boss instead?!

LEELULUMPKIN Thu 02-Jul-20 12:49:39

Can't you just accept it and flog it on or is that illegal? smile

heartsonacake Thu 02-Jul-20 12:50:52

It would be useless to me; I don’t drink. But I would politely say thank you and leave with the budget unspent.

I would not be buying alcohol as gifts because I don’t think alcohol should be legal and so I won’t encourage others to drink it. If they do so of their own accord that’s fine but I wouldn’t contribute to it.

Mummyoflittledragon Thu 02-Jul-20 12:51:31

All those saying buy and sell on, sounds like a good idea. But if you’re buying decent wine for investment, you would need a proper wine fridge (not cooler) or wine cellar. Perhaps the company will be able to sell you wine and point you in the direction of a specialist wine storage facility if that’s what you decide to do.

raffle Thu 02-Jul-20 12:52:23

@Oliversmumsarmy, you have never smoked yet received more than one ashtray for your birthday?! Who would buy an ashtray as a 21st birthday present, even if you WERE a smoker?

Heresto2020 Thu 02-Jul-20 12:53:28

Dont give it back. It’s rude. They obviously didn’t realise you are trying not to drink though it sounds like you are not tea total. I agree keep it and use it for gifts or regift it or maybe use for a party!

EmperorCovidula Thu 02-Jul-20 12:53:37

You don’t have to drink it you know. Just buy an expensive bottle and resell if you need the cash.

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