To be fed up of forced fun via Zoom?

[chocolatesaltyballs22]

My boss is a big one for forced fun - in normal times we would have to meet up face to face for 2 days for a team meeting with an overnight stay once a month, with 'activities' arranged in the evening. No free time to call your own. So I was so happy when we couldn't travel for work any more. I thought I was escaping the forced fun.

But oooooh no, you don't get away with it that easily. She has arranged monthly stuff via zoom which I find cringeworthy. I've declined most of them but tonight is the 'leaving do' of a colleague (who I like) so I feel like I have to go. My plan was to join for half an hour and have a quick drink but ooooooh no, you don't get away with it that easily! We are meant to be doing some online bloody escape rooms type thing, with a start time around the time I would prefer to be going off to bed, so it's not just going to be a case of turning up to say bye to my colleague.

WIBU for me to fake an internet outage and not turn up?

I'm grumpy as I have insomnia at the minute and haven't slept properly in days.

[StillCoughingandLaughing]

Your boss can’t force you to ‘go’ to the escape room. Tell her you will be joining for one drink but are busy after that. It’s not a work activity; it’s an activity with people you work with. They’re different things.

[Mrsjayy]

God. What an arse ache go for your one drink and moan about your connection and go to.bed.

[frustrationcentral]

Gah I have really disliked all of this zoom stuff that's been happening over lockdown. Some people just don't like it - I'm one of those!

[LillianBland]

That’s pathetic. I hate forced fun too. Please tell me that you don’t have to pay for the overnight stays, during the usual times.

[JaniceWebster]

Can't think of anything worst than forced fun (and I am pretty much the only female in a sales male environment!)

I would probably suck it up and do ONE activity this Friday and leave it at that.

[ShinyMe]

My internet has been getting worse and worse all through the working from home stuff. First my mic had to be muted to allow things to work, then my camera as well. Now I sometimes inexplicably get kicked out of meetings as well. :D

[Etinox]

It has to be done in work time, surely!

[averysuitablegirl]

Join early on. Mention several times that you can't hear people properly. Also move your lips as though you're talking and look surprised when they say they can't hear you.

Wish your colleague all the best, say that your connection is terrible and that you're sorry you'll have to miss all the fun.

Job done.

[annabel85]

I couldn't stand that. I love working from home so I can work alone all day (i'm an introvert) and find the hour long daily/weekly Skype calls bad enough.

I hate bosses who try to force their wacky extroverted persona onto their staff. Accept that people are different.

[Sparklesocks]

We organise ‘fun’ (subjective!) virtual activities in my team like quizzes, we did bingo once and Pictionary. But the difference is they’re often in office hours (say 4pm on a Friday) and not compulsory. We don’t want anyone to feel uncomfortable or forced into it. The main reason we do it is because quite a large percentage of my team live alone, and mentioned they felt a bit isolated so it was to try and counter that. However now lockdown is easing and we can see people they aren’t as needed and we don’t do it very often.

But outside of work hours and compulsory sounds pants!! I absolutely would fake internet problems and wouldn’t feel guilty

[BlusteryLake]

Definitely a day for a "bad connection". Join with all your enthusiasm, then suddenly get "cut off" after half an hour

[TheOrigBrave]

Is this overnight stay on your contract? If not tell them to sod off.

As far as forced Zoom fun - I hate it, and that's with my family!

If you are unable to join the sodding escape room just to say goodbye to your colleague can you contact them independently and wish them all the best? Or better still make loose plans to have a proper get together at some point.

[JaniceWebster]

It has to be done in work time, surely!

well, from experience I can tell you that if half the staff resent after work activities, the other half feels badly treated if it's not on offer...

In any office environment, remove the Christmas party that people are complaining about, and there will be an uproar. You genuinely cannot please everyone, and even a non-compulsory event will be seen as compulsory by some!

[annabel85]

Personally, i'm happy to go for drinks/food after work (if it's with people I like) but the virtual stuff (Zoom or whatever) i've no interest in taking any part in. I don't use social media anyway.

I've phoned/texted friends during this period and will see them again when it's more safe and convenient (not going to the pub yet). Zoom can fuck off.

[chocolatesaltyballs22]

Haha love some of these ideas - thanks!

No, overnight stays are all on expenses and I don't dislike my team mates (well, most of them!) but I just hate being told what I should do with my spare time. Under normal circumstances a leaving do would be after work, but honestly I'd rather just wait for when I can take the guy for a pint!

[InkieNecro]

I've been enjoying the forced fun to be honest, but yanbu.

Go for a bit, when you've had enough start having connection problems. Rope anyone else in the house in to walk in and loudly ask if you're having connection problems shortly before you disconnect. Then text and say you don't know what's wrong and to have fun.

[squeekyclean]

This sounds like my idea of hell. Can you fake an emergency that means you'll have to miss out (unless it happens a lot anyway I think an internet outage would look too obvious).

One (of many) reasons I left my last job was all the forced 'fun' and repercussions of not taking part. The last straw was when each department was given one day 'off' and a small budget every 6 months for an away day/event. Most had a morning of planning discussions, nice lunch out and home early. Our director insisted on making our day a Friday so we could go away somewhere and come home on the Saturday evening., using the budget for a hotel so we had to pay for our own meals and whatever entertainment he decided on. And we were expected to be grateful. I went to the first (which cost be several hundred £) and claimed lack of child care for the next one. My failure to attend this, and all of the (many, so many) Xmas meals/parties etc was actually brought up in my appraisal meeting!

[ouch321]

@shinyme

Hahaha

Gosh if I tried that my boss would say get the IT team on it

[chocolatesaltyballs22]

OMG @squeekyclean, what a cheek! That's a disgrace bringing it up at your appraisal as well.