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AIBU?

AIBU to think I shouldn't already fit into my old jeans 8 months pp?

71 replies

BabyLlamaZen · 30/06/2020 15:29

I lost some weight immediately after giving birth and thought it would be easy, but then nothing. I felt ok as I had just had a baby and told myself that as it takes 9 months for my body to grow, it should take 9 months to get it back. And that was without lockdown and the fact you are exhausted and have a baby to look after. I also hate the pressure on women and assumed it wouldn't be just me.

I am now 8 months post partum. I
went out for a socially distant NCT picnic last week and started noticing (now that we're less wrapped up in coats) that the others looked super slim and were wearing jeans (around size 8/10). And some of them seemed to have put one lot of weight when pregnant. They are all 8 or 9 months post partum.

I went to another one today and there were different members of the group, but also really slim! One of them was still in leggings and long tops but she looked really toned. Everyone else back in normal jeans.

I literally cant get any jeans to fit me. I had a pair of size 12 I bought (always a 10 before) that were a horrible strain and just dont fit. Most of my weight is thighs and hips. I wasnt too bothered but seeing them has now made me worries it's taking me too long. I dont know how they do it. Sad I also feel like I still look really unattractive.

YABU - you should be able to fit into them by now

YANBU - it takes longer than 8 months if at all

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

251 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
30%
You are NOT being unreasonable
70%
RatherBeRiding · 30/06/2020 15:34

I shouldn't worry about it too much - it takes as long as it takes! Not everyone gains weight during pregnancy and so can fit back into pre-pregnancy clothes almost immediately.

Others gain a lot of weight but find they can lose it quickly. Others find it harder to shift.

Everyone is different and comparing yourself to other women is utterly pointless and will only make you feel that you "ought" to be back at your old weight.

There's no magic formula - take in less calories than you expend and you will lose weight. Exercise and you will tone up.

But above all, don't worry about it!!

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Pileon · 30/06/2020 15:36

Pregnancy changes your body. I was back in my jeans within a couple of weeks but my back was broader for years!
You probably could get back into them if you wanted to put some effort in but if you’ve got any spare energy (I certainly didn’t at 8 months pp) id advise putting it into enjoying your baby rather than dieting

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Nighttimefreedom · 30/06/2020 15:36

We're all different and sometimes your body shape actually changes permanently.
Personally I felt better and more normal buying a few nice new items of non maternity clothes in my new size.

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Tunnocks34 · 30/06/2020 15:38

I’ve put YABU but what I mean is YABU to judge yourself by how other people look.

I was in my pre Pregnancy jeans 1 week after giving birth each time. Nothing I did to make it so - just genetics. There is no right or wrong way you should look within a certain time frame.

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LightDrizzle · 30/06/2020 15:38

Well there’s no should about it.
After DD2 I was a size 8 and in my old clothes within 2 weeks,
After DD1 I’m sure it was longer.
I was very fit and slim when I conceived DD2 and I continued at the gym early pregnancy and was walking a Dalmatian for over an hour a day up to the day before I had her. I only gained baby weight and as she was in NICU and I was expressing, there was no sitting on the sofa grazing for me after the birth.
Anyone could be in their old jeans by 8 months without detriment to their health, but for some it is not a priority or it is more difficult. Sleep deprivation and isolation can increase comfort eating.
Don’t worry about them and as long as you are not so overweight that there are morbidity factors, don’t worry about you either.
I can’t vote on this as the choices are skewed and unhelpful.

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Bluntness100 · 30/06/2020 15:39

Op there is no given amount of time it should take. I lost it quickly others don’t. But there is no such thing as it should take eight months to loose the weight. As the first poster said, it takes as long as it takes.

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BabyLlamaZen · 30/06/2020 15:39

Anyone know a good place to buy Jean's? 😂

OP posts:
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BabyLlamaZen · 30/06/2020 15:40

Maybe, but seeing 8 different women at different times having lost weight makes feel unusual for it!

OP posts:
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ChaoticCatling · 30/06/2020 15:42

I don't think it's should or shouldn't so I haven't voted. I put mine on after my shower after giving birth (then bled through them Blush). It depends on how much weight you put on and many other factors.

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Pieceofpurplesky · 30/06/2020 15:43

Different women are different. Don't compare yourself - not many spring back in to jeans after a week! Maybe the leggings and long top woman had super
Suck in pants, maybe she didn't. You are bing your own worst enemy - these women probably didn't even notice that you are any different to them

Don't beat yourself up

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Laaalaaaa · 30/06/2020 15:44

I know it’s a cliche, but everybody really is different. Without even trying, I actually lost weight whilst pregnant and I was eating like a horse - I was permanently starving. After baby was born I was lighter than I’d been in years and had to go and buy jeans in a smaller size. Of course I couldn’t maintain that and I’m back to where I was before pregnancy.

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Gumbo · 30/06/2020 15:45

I'm not really sure, I left the delivery room wearing my jeans (although they didn't fully zip up and the button wouldn't fasten). But- I had a small bump due to decreased fluid, so the whole bump was basically baby... I imagine some of your shape is determined by how your body carried the baby in the first place?

But don't stress, you're doing fine Smile

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bestbrowsintown · 30/06/2020 15:45

It's different for everyone. I was a size 10 before but even when I got back to pre pregnancy weight I couldn't get them back on as my hips have permanently widened. My rib cage is also bigger.

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CaptainMyCaptain · 30/06/2020 15:45

I had such terrible morning sickness for 9 months I could hardly eat at all. My baby was fine (7lb 14oz) but I lost weight off myself and left hospital in a pencil skirt. Perhaps the people you saw hadn't put much weight on in pregnancy.

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PlanDeRaccordement · 30/06/2020 15:45

Cant assume the weight just gradually leaves your body over months/year. You have to be active and exercise to lose the baby weight. If at 8 months, you are still two sizes bigger than you were before pregnancy, that’s not going anywhere unless you do something about it. Check your food intake, many women eat for two when pregnant and then keep in eating larger portions after the birth. Add in exercise.

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user1493413286 · 30/06/2020 15:47

Everyone is different and I don’t think there is a should about it; with my first I didn’t really put on any weight and with my second it’s been a hard slog of dieting to get back to my pre pregnancy weight but some of my jeans still don’t fit as my hips have changed

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Ullupullu · 30/06/2020 15:48

Is this your first child? I was back in old jeans about 18 months after DC1. Could never fit in them again after DC2 even though I'm actually much fitter now! But my hips/pelvis widened so much that I simply can't fit into some old jeans and dresses. Even when I've been slimmer and more toned than ever. I suppose my point overall is that even if you do lose weight and get fit, do it for your health, not to get into old clothes that your new body shape might never fit again.

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Mypathtriedtokillme · 30/06/2020 15:49

Bodies change shape, weights distributed differently and for me the worst thing was my feet are a size bigger after 2 pregnancies and none if my lovely pre-prego shoes fit.

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user1493413286 · 30/06/2020 15:50

Although I will add that my own experience is that whatever weight is still there after 6 weeks doesn’t come off by itself sadly

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Moonshinemisses · 30/06/2020 15:50

If I were you I'd just go & buy some new jeans in a bigger size. Maybe your shape has changed & you'll never fit into your old ones. What matters is they fit well & you feel good in them. Try new look they have a good selection of styles & not a bad price

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DomDoesWotHeWants · 30/06/2020 15:50

Don't stress about it, people differ.

I was 4 months and back in jeans with DS1 and nearly a year with DS2.

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AwkwardAsAllGetout · 30/06/2020 15:52

Please don’t feel bad about this. With my first 2 dc I put on an extraordinary amount of weight and it took real effort, and much longer than 9 months to shift. With my last I only put on a stone which I’d lost within 2 weeks. She’s now 14 months old and I’m half a stone heavier which I’m blaming on lockdown but really, her first year was ridiculously stressful. Hormonally, breastfeeding seems to make me hold on to weight, then I seem to have a sudden increase when I stop, which I did 2 months ago. I know I need to do something about my weight as I’m several stone over where I should be, but I’m exhausted and my body and age seem to be working against me. Please don’t judge yourself against others. I have one dear friend who’s always been very slim and she HATED the comments after her dc were born that she was being irresponsible to already be so skinny. It’s just how she’s built.

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Passthecake30 · 30/06/2020 15:54

I managed to get back into my clothes by the time I went back to work (9 months for one, 12 months for another), I put on 3.5 stone with both, lost about 2.5 easily and just went on a push to lose the last bit as the return to work date loomed. Nothing like returning back to work and the public in order to focus the effort.
I voted YABU, however I realise I might’ve found it easier to lose weight than others do.

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Andwoooshtheyweregone · 30/06/2020 15:55

There’s not time frame and there isn’t a should or a shouldn’t. Don’t compare yourself. I was in my jeans same week as birth but have gained weight since but still in my jeans.

Just be healthy and go at your own pace!

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Iwalkinmyclothing · 30/06/2020 15:56

Different for everyone. I also found different after every baby! After ds1, even when I had lost more weight than I had gained and was thus lighter than pre conception, my hips, bust and waist were all still bigger. Pregnancy can really change your body- and different does not necessarily mean worse.

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