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Tonight I have broken

(61 Posts)

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Boredbumhead Sun 28-Jun-20 20:34:51

I feel so stressed with sore gums and tonsillitis and shivers. My boss is emailing me asking to do some edits on my presentation tomorrow. My 4 year old has literally been playing with matches all day. Hrs just shoved bubble wrap in the wood burner which has melted on the glass. Him and 8 year old had been running in and out of the house all day. Slamming doors. My nerves are in sheds. P has been out all day doing a sport then started slamming doors homself before sitting down at his computer and ignoring the kids. I have just lost my shit. I keep saying good bye world to myself, and meaning it because I am sick of it all.

Boomclaps Sun 28-Jun-20 20:42:57

Hi op do you have anyone you can call IRL?
It sounds really tough

Boredbumhead Sun 28-Jun-20 20:45:18

My mum. But I'm so ill and tired I can't sleep.

Boredbumhead Sun 28-Jun-20 20:45:42

Or speak.

granadagirl Sun 28-Jun-20 20:51:56

Write him a note, telling him your going to bed and HE is looking after the kids tonight (if they haven’t already gone to bed)
Or
From when you finish work tomorrow, as you will be going straight to bed.

LakieLady Sun 28-Jun-20 20:51:57

You're ill, OP.

Take some aspirin or paracetamol, tell your DP he has to mind the kids because you're ill, and go to bed. Make yourself a hot drink (or even a hot toddy) and take it with you. Refuse to get up for anything other than a wee.

If you still feel shit tomorrow, say bollocks to the presentation and take the day off. You need to rest. And you may need ABs, so phone the doctor if you still feel as bas today.

And tell yourself that this, too, will pass.

Tonsillitis is the pits. I had mine out 50 years ago but can still remember, vividly, how incredibly ill it used to make me feel.

Look after yourself. flowers

Boredbumhead Sun 28-Jun-20 20:54:35

Thank you all. The most support I've had all day.

My boss is expecting notes from me tonight, but I can't. She recently emails me more over the weekend.

Boredbumhead Sun 28-Jun-20 20:55:09

I hate Letting her down

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult Sun 28-Jun-20 20:58:38

Break it down into one issue at a time.

Email your boss, tell them you are really ill, you cannot do the work, you need a day or 2. You are allowed sick days.

Your partner NEEDS to step up and look after the kids. He cannot fuck off out and sign out of parenting all day then sit on the computer all night.

You have to rest, get some paracetamol, fluids, and sleep.

The world will look like a different place tomorrow. I promise you. flowers

aceyace Sun 28-Jun-20 20:58:46

You must tell her how you are feeling! Take some painkillers and try to rest, i gargle with salt water when I get tonsillitisthanks

HebeMumsnet (MNHQ) Sun 28-Jun-20 20:58:56

Hi there, OP. We're sorry you're having such a tough time of it. We thought we'd just pop in with our usual link to our Mental Health Webguide. If you feel like you need a bit of support but can't pick up the phone you can always email jo@samaritans.org, too. flowers

Youngatheart00 Sun 28-Jun-20 21:01:01

Tonsillitis is horrible. You need to rest. Tell your boss quite simply, you have tonsillitis and will not be working tonight (or tomorrow). Rest flowers

Angelnix Sun 28-Jun-20 21:01:29

You have my sympathy, tonsillitis is the pits. Your partner isn't being fair, tell him that you're ill, he needs to deal with the kids and get yourself to bed. Do you usually work over the weekend? Your boss shouldn't really be hassling you at home.

Feel better soon xx

Mrsjayy Sun 28-Jun-20 21:01:35

Your kids dad thinks Its alright to leave the kids with a sick mum whilst he goes out on his bike your boss thinks its fine to email you at the weekend I'd message kids dad that you are I'll and to watch his children and email your boss saying you are I'll and will be off tomorrow, only person you need to worry about is you.

Bilzo Sun 28-Jun-20 21:02:22

Could you go to your mums and just sleep there? Leave him with the kids?

Stannisbaratheonsboxofmatches Sun 28-Jun-20 21:04:35

Tell the boss you are ill and will be off sick for a couple of days. She shouldn’t message you at the weekend anyway, so ignore all messages from her on the weekend from now on.

Tell P you are sick and going to bed. Tell him he is in charge of the kids tonight and for the next couple of days. What on Earth was he doing out all day if you were sick anyway?

Get some rest and recover.

Euclid Sun 28-Jun-20 21:06:02

OP this is terrible for you. I agree that your boss should leave you alone at the weekend and your partner should step up to the plate and look after your children when you are ill. Go to bed and rest.

Suzie6789 Sun 28-Jun-20 21:13:48

Email your boss and say you are very ill with bad tonsillitis, and will have to be off sick and consequently regret that you don’t be able to do the work. Then turn your phone off.
It’s not ok to hassle you at home like this.

GuiltyBark Sun 28-Jun-20 21:17:35

You're unwell! Send an email saying you're sick and can't work tomorrow. You can't drive the bus when there is nothing in the tank.

I've been where you are and it's relentless. Humans are impossibly strong, you will be OK. I agree it's partner's turn to step up. Yes he may be working but you were also. You need to rest. If he complains say he had a day out today - when is your day off?

FlameFartingDragon Sun 28-Jun-20 21:26:23

(1) E-mail your boss and tell them you are unwell and will be speaking to a GP tomorrow to confirm how many days off are required to get better. Attach the latest presentation and say you will be in touch once you know how many days are required to get better

(2) Tell your husband to start parenting.

(3) Go to your Mums.

viques Sun 28-Jun-20 21:28:01

Tonsillitis can turn nasty and very serious. My cousin ended up with nephritis and a permanently damaged kidney because she ignored a bad bout of tonsillitis and the infection spread. Phone in sick. Get it sorted.

Also, hide the matches!

Boredbumhead Sun 28-Jun-20 21:29:04

Thanks all. I've got a licorice and mint tea and honey in it and going to bed.
I feel like that bird at the front of the v that needs to slide and slipstream stream to the back. I'm a deputy department leader with two young kids at home. I've been so strong up to now but I'm breaking.

minielise Sun 28-Jun-20 21:30:15

Message your boss now informing her you are ill and that you won’t be working tomorrow. First thing tomorrow sort a doctors appointment to see if you can get something to help with the tonsillitis, if feeling down is regular you can discuss that too. Go to bed now until tomorrow or have a relaxing bath with a book/magazine. The stuff with the kids is annoying but insignificant in the grand scheme of things, I imagine they are now in bed so that can be forgotten about, make it clear that if they get up during the night you are too poorly to deal with it.

Ladywinesalot Sun 28-Jun-20 21:30:59

OP you are ill.

You are allowed to be ill.

Tell your boss your sick and can not work next few days. Tell boss you will no longer be available over weekends.

DP must look after his own children.

Pleas rest and look after yourself

Delbelleber Sun 28-Jun-20 21:32:26

flowers

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