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Housekeeping - am I missing something?

(213 Posts)
overweightcat Sun 28-Jun-20 18:57:07

Our house is a bit small for us but not too bad.
We have lots of stuff but everything generally has its place and I try to declutter as and when.
We don't have a dishwasher which is a chore of its own as I feel constantly chained to the sink if I don't want a mountain of dishes at the end of the day.

I love it when it's clean, it usually builds up though and then I tackle it all in a day or two and it looks great....
But once it's clean I find that if don't go around CONSTANTLY tidying, cleaning or picking stuff up its back to a mess within a few hours. I feel that unless I never sit down and relax my house will never be clean. It's so relentless and boring.

Whenever I visit some of my friends be it planned or an unplanned visit they have beautiful immaculate houses, yes with some toys etc strewn about if they have kids but it's tidy and neat and relaxing and they always seem relaxed too.

What am I missing? Is there some secret handbook I've never read???

OP’s posts: |
Spikeypineapples Sun 28-Jun-20 18:58:28

Ha, when you find out the answer, let me know!

WorraLiberty Sun 28-Jun-20 18:59:17

How many people live in your house and how old are they?

formerbabe Sun 28-Jun-20 18:59:29

I'm exactly the same op.

LookToTreblesGoingTreblesGone Sun 28-Jun-20 18:59:44

Well, that's you and me both then!
I think that it'll only happen for me if I actually lived alone.

I have no solution, but I wait with anticipation for someone with an answer!

CareBear50 Sun 28-Jun-20 19:00:37

A tip I once heard was and constantly abide by is......never leave a room empty handed.

In other words I guess, tidy up as you go buy always leaving s room with something in your hand is a great practical reminder

Ernieshere Sun 28-Jun-20 19:01:18

Can you save up for a dishwasher? Or is there no room. I got rid of a cupboard for a dishwasher.

Its actually broken at the moment & the time I could save from washing up, could be spent on the other jobs.

CreditCrackers Sun 28-Jun-20 19:01:55

Get a dishwasher. It changed my life. Best thing I ever bought. People will make bitchy comments but honestly, they're life changing.

pigsDOfly Sun 28-Jun-20 19:02:52

You're seeing your own mess, but when you go into other people's houses you don't see their mess. Your seeing their houses on a more superficial level.

Probably, they come to your house and think how come overweightcat's house always looks so nice and tidy?

DontTouchTheMoustache Sun 28-Jun-20 19:03:12

My house is only vaguely clean for about 24hours after my cleaner has been. Before I had a cleaner it was never clean.

bridgetreilly Sun 28-Jun-20 19:03:18

Why is this only your job? Everyone needs to be keeping on top of the washing up and the tidying, not just you. Even young children need to learn to tidy up and help around the house.

Also, I bet your friends who make it look effortless either (a) are feeling exactly the same as you or (b) have a cleaner.

TweetUsOnFacebook Sun 28-Jun-20 19:05:08

I don't think you tend to notice 'mess' as much in someone else's house as you do in your own.

Who else lives with you? Why are they making a mess and not tidying up? Children can be trained to tidy away toys that they've finished playing with.

Maybe try and keep one room 'nice' that you can relax in. Your bedroom?

JaniceWebster Sun 28-Jun-20 19:05:20

You DO need a dishwasher for a start. Otherwise things pile up non-stop and it WILL look messy unless you physically clean.

Otherwise just put things where they belong. If it's too much faff, you need to rethink your storage system. It's clearly not working. You shouldn't need to tidy up if you just put things in the right spot to start with.

It's worth losing a cabinet somewhere to install a dishwasher. Imagine getting rid of your laundry basket... the pile of dirty clothes would look a mess always. Same thing.

Darkestseasonofall Sun 28-Jun-20 19:05:32

Enlist the dc to help, even my 3 year old is a dab hand at tidying.
Declutter, if you've too much stuff your house will never be tidy and relaxing.

JaniceWebster Sun 28-Jun-20 19:07:00

Also, I bet your friends who make it look effortless either (a) are feeling exactly the same as you or (b) have a cleaner.

or c) have found what works for their home.
HOW do you use your "stuff" and what storage you have makes a huge difference. As an example, you should never need to tidy up your entrance hall. Tidy up of what? If you have to during the day, you are not doing it right to fit your lifestyle.

WorraLiberty Sun 28-Jun-20 19:08:38

Also, I bet your friends who make it look effortless either (a) are feeling exactly the same as you or (b) have a cleaner.

Why isn't (a) 'Has a partner and children who pull their weight'?

I'm guessing the OP is single with DC who are too young to put their toys away.

Otherwise she's missing a huge chapter in the 'handbook'.

JustC Sun 28-Jun-20 19:11:50

Assuming you don't drop by unannounced, you do know some people clear/clean up begore a guest arrives? You should see me when someone rings me and asks of they can drop in for a cuppa, tasmanian devil 😁. Dont stress, most household with kids are absolutely the same as yours.

Oblomov20 Sun 28-Jun-20 19:19:59

Getting a dishwasher changed things for me. My house is very very low maintenance. I open the post deal with it, file it. There's not much clutter or 'stuff'. I do minimal housework. A quickly weekly hoover and a wipe down and it looks presentable.
I fear it would take you a lot of work to get it like that though, and I doubt it would suit your personality?

Warpdrive Sun 28-Jun-20 19:21:34

People ask me from time to time how I keep my house so tidy, but when I reflect on it - there are 2 main things that make a difference.
1) I have lots of build in storage: footstools which store kids games, I have 3 HUGE cupboards off the hall for coats, shoes, bags, filing cabinets etc and all our beds have built-in storage.
2) I don't have as many things in my house as most people. I keep surfaces free from clutter and that really helps to achieve a tidy look. I don't even have a toaster - they just make tonnes of crumbs and the more things you have, the more untidy the place will seem.

CatWhisperer86 Sun 28-Jun-20 19:24:04

I don’t know OP, what I do know is those times it’s lovely and clean and tidy no bugger visits - everyone likes to turn up when it’s a fucking mess grin

JustC Sun 28-Jun-20 19:29:26

Oh, no dishwasher here either(renting and kitchen is a matchbox). I honestly sometimes feel there is a secret family in our attic, adding more dishes in my sink!

JaniceWebster Sun 28-Jun-20 19:33:38

you do know some people clear/clean up begore a guest arrives?

I genuinely don't, and I do not understand people who do.
Either you are happy and comfortable with your own home, so that should be enough. Unless maybe the Queen pops by, but how often does that happen?

Or you are uncomfortable and unhappy ,so why don't you address the issue for your own benefit and the people who live there, instead of bothering for people who will only be there for 1 hour or 2 in a WEEK?

TwoTribes Sun 28-Jun-20 19:36:15

'How many people live in your house and how old are they?'

Yes, we need to know this really before anyone can help.

Queenest Sun 28-Jun-20 19:41:51

I tidy round before people visit blush

I think most people do don’t they?

Northernlass99 Sun 28-Jun-20 19:42:34

If you can possibly manage it, just get a dishwasher. Even a small one. Lifechanging. Its not the time spent washing which isn't that much really, its more chucking things in there so there isn't a constant pile of dishes hanging around.

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