Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

1 2 3 4 5

AIBU?

To keep my daughter of nursery to hide black eye

117 replies

mummywoes · 28/06/2020 07:33

Name changed for this.
My 2 year old hit her cheek on the side of the fire place yesterday after getting hyper and running around with her sister and has a cut on her cheekbone with a bruise all along the bottom of her eye. I'm really worried about sending her to nursery in case they think we've abused her and call social services.
Should I keep her off until it's better? I don't want to risk her being taken away if they don't believe us.

OP posts:

Report

RedHelenB · 28/06/2020 07:35

No. Send her in and explain to staff what happened. Keeping her off will raise more questions. Kids have accidents all the time.

FrugiFan · 28/06/2020 07:35

They wouldnt report you to social services for a one off event like that. They would definitely clock it and maybe record it somewhere in order to look for a pattern in case there is one. Kids hurt themselves all the time. If anything, keeping her off nursery looks more suspicious.

IKEA888 · 28/06/2020 07:35

no don't do that. just tell the truth.
Have you had a bad SS experience before ?
accidents happen.
You've nothing to hide so don't worry.
If you keep her off it can arouse suspicion in itself.

WisestIsShe · 28/06/2020 07:35

All children get bumps and bruises. Nursery will ask you about it, ask her when you're not there, and keep a note of an existing injury but unless it's part of a pattern they won't call social services. Tbh, keeping her home to hide the bruise would be more concerning to me.

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat · 28/06/2020 07:36

Do send her in. They will ask you to sign an existing injury form (absolutely normal procedure) and that will be it.

ShastaBeast · 28/06/2020 07:37

It may look more suspect if you keep her off. I sent mine in with all sorts of bumps and scrapes - ADHD in the family. If the nursery knows you well and you explain it shouldn’t be raised as an issue unless it happens a lot.

BananaSpanner · 28/06/2020 07:37

Definitely don’t keep her off. Take her in, explain. These things happen, they will be far more concerned if they think you are concealing injuries/bruises, especially if you dc mentions why they were off even in a v basic 2 year old way.

Iwantacookie · 28/06/2020 07:38

Take her in and explain. I remember taking dd to nursery with 2 blacks eyes thanks to ds1. They just need to document any injury so you cant blame them

VashtaNerada · 28/06/2020 07:40

Oh no, don’t worry! I’ve seen all kinds of horrific injuries as a teacher and I never assume the parents are abusers. It all gets logged in case at some point other worrying evidence were to come to light but this alone honestly wouldn’t be a worry to me. Most children end up with injuries logged at some point or other. I have one girl who is really accident-prone but there’s absolutely no reason for concern.

PleasantVille · 28/06/2020 07:40

Why would you even think that? That's a worrying reaction to an everyday occurrence.

Apolloanddaphne · 28/06/2020 07:40

Send her in and explain what happened. It looks very suspicious keeping her off. Children get injuries like that all the time and the staff will know what to be alert to in terms of abuse. I am a retired SW who used to work in Child protection and that sort of injury with an appropriate explanation would not have concerned me.

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 28/06/2020 07:42

Honestly, it's fine.

When DS was that age he was constantly covered in bruises, no one ever said anything.

Luckily they grow out of their clumsy phase by the time they start school.

YinuCeatleAyru · 28/06/2020 07:42

keeping her off would raise way more suspicions.

I would phone in advance and ask about the procedure for reporting an accidental injury at home, so that you can have the conversation without the emotive sight of the child having already rung alarm bells.

HappyPunky · 28/06/2020 07:46

Tell them what happened. They might make a note of it.
I had a similar thing happen to DD and they made a note of it so they had a record that it didn't happen there.

CockCarousel · 28/06/2020 07:46

As well as raising suspicions at school, it's a really bad idea to ask a female child to be secretive about injuries.

mummywoes · 28/06/2020 07:46

@IKEA888 no previous involvement, always assumed they'd never have any reason to be but then this happened yesterday and I was awake all night thinking how could we let this happen and now what?

OP posts:

PleasantVille · 28/06/2020 07:50

[quote mummywoes]**@IKEA888 no previous involvement, always assumed they'd never have any reason to be but then this happened yesterday and I was awake all night thinking how could we let this happen and now what? [/quote]
What do you mean by how could you let it happen, there can't be a child in the land who hasn't had an accident, schools have children with injuries in them permanently.

Your attitude is strange, do you have some kind of anxiety issue?

Charliebigpotatoes · 28/06/2020 07:51

My 2 year old is an absolute whirlwind and as such he fairly often gets bumps and bruises. I explain what happened to the childminder and that's it.

Unless there are other concerns they won't contact social services. They are usually trained to spot behaviours, types of injury etc.

A black eye alone won't be a problem, they absolutely know that children injure themselves. Please don't worry, I know it can play on your mind but a one off injury isn't anything to worry about.

mummywoes · 28/06/2020 07:52

Thanks for the replies, I'll take her in and explain to nursery as she has already missed so much it wouldn't be fair to her as she loves going. Thanks everyone.

OP posts:

SofiaAmes · 28/06/2020 07:56

My ds gave himself a black eye and a gash AT the childminders on his second day there. She was mortified and I had to keep apologizing and explaining that if a week went by without DS injuring himself, she should let me know because it surely meant something was wrong with him.

UltimateWednesday · 28/06/2020 07:57

No send her in. The nursery may (should) ask what happpened but they won't do anything further unless a pattern emerges.

BudgieHammockBananaSmuggler · 28/06/2020 07:57

I hope you are suitably reassured OP! Quite a strange worry to have - I hope you are ok. I would think nursery/schools would be more alert about subtle things like finger shaped bruises than overt injuries like this. 2yos are quite well known for running around like idiots and having no sense of danger or spatial awareness. Or is that just my one?

Lollypop4 · 28/06/2020 08:00

I actually kept my DS off once for a few days for exactly same reason.
He was a real rough and tumble child amd was always getting sone form of injury.
one particular week, he had so many bumps and bruises, then ran straight into to a door handle, huge bruise.
I was really worried what teachers would think. I did call them though and explain, they were fine about it.
I felt silly after as the school staff knew how he was regarding injuries.

IKEA888 · 28/06/2020 08:01

Try not to worry. Hope the nursery can reassure you too.

mistermagpie · 28/06/2020 08:03

My DS (aged three) went to A&E six times in 18 months with various injuries including a black eye. He's a climber and just generally quite accident prone. Nobody ever reported us to anyone and when it started to get a bit embarrassing the Dr said that our explanations and his/our behaviour just didn't show any cause for concern. Nursery never said anything about any of it, but they have known him since he was a baby and know what he's like!

As a one-off nobody will be concerned.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.