No hospital visits

[Knocksomesense]

I posted not so long ago that I thought my nan was dying.

She's now in hospital with sepsis. No CV.

Hospital are not allowing visitors. I feel so lost and alone and far away from my family.

I hate that we are not the only family to have gone through this.

I have no aibu but this sucks

[PurBal]

Huge hugs coming your way. My grandma died during lockdown so I do empathise.

[Knocksomesense]

I just need the end to come quickly now

[Knocksomesense]

Nan didnt have a good day yesterday. She is sleeping a lot and not really drinking enough.

She is almost permanently under an electric blanket now to keep her body temperature up. She no longer says if she is cold.

I hate that she isnt allowed a single visitor

[Rudolphian]

I didnt want to read and run.
Just wanted to say, as someone who has recently needed hospital care I understand what you mean about wishing visitors were allowed.

[CrowdedHouseinQuarantine]

iam so sorry,
does she have access to an ipad? does the ward?
can she face time you? or i guess she is too poorly

[Knocksomesense]

She's a bit too out if it, I think. She doesnt have access to any technology though.

Mum is battling to get the medical staff to understand that despite being 86, nan isnt an old lady. She isnt confused and isnt sleepy. This is new in the last couple of weeks. She was talking not so long ago about going into town and having to wear a face mask. She was looking forward to lockdown ending

[CrowdedHouseinQuarantine]

best wishes for a full recovery to your nan

[carmelsundae]

The trust that I work in has a policy that one visitor is allowed in for end of life care. It doesn't make it any easier for a family, but means that at least one person can sit with the relative and they they aren't alone. Can you try and push for this?

[Knocksomesense]

They have said they will call my auntie if she needs to go in

[7yo7yo]

I think you need to call the ward and speak to the head nurse/matron.
In my department we allow visitors for a short while if the patient is covid negative. We also facilitate meetings via zoom and iPads

[spinningaround72]

If they have the same policy same as the hospital my grandad was at then somebody will be allowed in if/when she is end of life. We were not allowed in before that, and then he was allowed one person at a time but only I could go and was ok taking the risk because he was covid positive.

One of my colleagues had the same with her mum so most hospitals must be doing it.

[Clearyweary]

Call the hospital and double check. The Trust I work for allows visitors for certain situations, and has actually opened up from today to all visitors (restricted to one at a time). Call the ward

[EKGEMS]

No visitors at hospital I work at unless end of life,special needs or birthing partner. Sepsis patients get aggressive antibiotics and fluids and close monitoring for issues like hypothermia, exactly like your Nan is getting. Why do you think the medical staff aren't listening to you?

[Rupertpenrysmistress]

I agree my trust has allowed 1 hour per person per day to visit since last week under PHE guidance. End of life is also more flexible. We even allowed people to visit before this if someone was dying.

Check again with the ward and if needed request them to ask the matron. PALS are also helpful.
I am so sorry for your situation. As a nurse I would like to reassure you we will always try to ensure a staff member is with your relative especially near the end. I have spent alot of time with dying patient's recently as I and my colleagues hate the thought of someone dying alone.

[Knocksomesense]

No visitors allowed still. She's holding her own.

It was just my mums feeling that they weren't listening. Unfortunately I'm only getting second hand information.

[MereDintofPandiculation]

Mum is battling to get the medical staff to understand that despite being 86, nan isnt an old lady. Make sure she also puts it in writing, so it gets on to your nan's file, and put in dates and specific incidents, eg "She was walking to the shops, she did all her own food shopping and house cleaning, as recently as June16 she walked 1/2 a mile to the supermarket, then walked back home carrying her shopping; then in the afternoon walked round her local park. On 17th Feb she listened to xxx on the radio and had a long conversation with me about the performance Grant Schapps". Be as specific as possible. I had to do this for my DF.

[Knocksomesense]

That's a fab idea. Thankyou

[redwoodmazza]

My MIL had a bleed on the brain and was admitted to hospital a few weeks ago. After a day of tests, they said there was nothing they could do for her and she was at 'end of life'.

DH and I live more than 300 miles away. BIL lived locally to her and he gave my DH FOUR reasons why he shouldn't travel to be there at the hospital - all rubbish reasons. I suggested DH phoned the hospital to get correct information. As 'end of life' she was allowed 2 visitors. There was a comfy chair in the room for my DH to sleep in, en-suite facilities and bedding provided.

My DH drove there and was with her when she passed away - which meant a lot to him.

I think BIL wanted to be able to be there with his girlfriend [the second visitor] and not with my DH as they don't get on too well. But to try and prevent your own brother being there? Who would do that FFS?

Perhaps you can ask the hospital direct OP?

[Knocksomesense]

She isn't quite end of life. I'm not sure where she's at. Some positive signs. Mum even managed to talk to her on the phone yesterday- although apparently she was hard to understand and it was like talking to a toddler