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AIBU?

What makes you happy

17 replies

Ori37 · 23/06/2020 13:13

In your experience, if you had to name something that makes you genuinely happy, what is it? It could be anything, anything at all, even if it's something illicit!

I have two baby boys, who are happy and healthy. Being around them makes me want to scream sometimes but I think I'm at my happiest when I'm not thinking about myself or my ego. I've got no money, and no career, although I do have a little part-time job that's local.

I don't want for anything. I'm not accessing foodbanks but I can't afford some of the luxuries of life, such as eating out or getting new clothes. I generally shop in charity shops. I take the kids to the park a lot, or outside; places where I don't have to pay an entrance fee.

I do struggle to put petrol in my car and only put a tenner in at a time. But I'm not unhappy. Just broke. I've heard it said that beyond meeting your basic needs, money doesn't actually make you any happier. From those of you who consider yourselves wealthy do you agree or not? Are you happy with lots of money?

If I compare myself to other people this makes me really pissed off and unhappy. If I watch the news all the time this also makes me unhappy. However - If the kids are happy and go to bed happy and well-fed that makes me feel at genuine peace. I go to bed then in a calm state of mind. I feel like I've done a good job.

If I think too much about getting older that makes me unhappy. I've got an old piano that I bought ages ago and I play it sometimes when the boys are in the garden. I love doing this. I feel happy when I'm playing. I like creative writing - I'm really really happy when I'm writing.

I'm not very happy when I think about building a career. Some people at work seem very dedicated but unhappy. I sometimes wonder if people confuse having a career with lifestyle. I think the two are very different.

AIBU to ask - what makes you happy?

OP posts:
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Stompythedinosaur · 23/06/2020 20:50

While I agree that having money doesn't make you happy, my experience of having too little money was that it made me unhappy a lot of the time. I don't miss the worry about how to afford things.

We aren't rich by a long shot, but not having to worry about how to manage from payday to payday has opened the door to many other small joys in life - being able to cook and favourite meal, seeing the seeds I've planted in the garden thrive, watching my dc really invested in an imaginary game together.

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Guineapigbridge · 24/06/2020 03:44

Riding my bike.
Being recognised at work for a job well done.
Watching TV with my kids.

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Guineapigbridge · 24/06/2020 03:45

And dinner dates with my lovely husband

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spottygymbag · 24/06/2020 04:52

Running with my headphones listening to my favorite songs with out DD complaining about it not being her music. Just started back after DS's arrival 12weeks who and now I'm though the first couple of awful runs it's become a joy again. I had forgotten how much I loved it!

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Redcrow · 24/06/2020 06:48

My daughters and my husband make me happy. We live on a farm, hardly any spare cash but loads of meadows and streams and spending days outside playing with my dds, with no one else there, no mobile phone and no one knowing what we are doing is what makes me happiest. Hiding from the big world in our own little world

The shower I have after a run is also a very happy place

I could work more and have more money but for now the time with my daughters is what's important and always being there to pick them up at 3pm

Cooking from scratch makes me happy and watching my family eat every bite of the meal I've made also gives me joy

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redwoodmazza · 24/06/2020 08:45

Talking in person to our son - he'll be 28 on 28th! We are so similar and instantly 'get' what the other means - and we can always have a laugh. He's living on his own in his flat, about 10 miles away. I miss him.

My DH on the other hand, who I'm living with, is miserable and controlling [which he denies]. I am so down until I can chat with my son.

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Sparklesocks · 24/06/2020 09:34

Family
Friends
A big lie in after a busy week
Curling up with a good book or a silly Netflix series with nothing else to do
Driving in the sun, with the windows down and music on (although not obnoxiously blaring!)
Walks in the woods/beauty spots

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Fcukthisshit · 24/06/2020 11:03

Sunshine
Being at home / in the garden
Lie ins (they are rare)
Aldi chocolate marshmallow bombs
Putting the Christmas decs up

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Toilenstripes · 24/06/2020 11:06

My husband, seeing my cat chase flies in the garden, strawberries, art galleries and a good novel.

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PrincessHoneysuckle · 24/06/2020 11:06

Booking a holiday.The joy of pressing "Book Now" is brilliant.

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Happyspud · 24/06/2020 11:22

Curling up with my little kids one on one to watch TV is my happy place.
I love seeing family and friends.
Chatting with my mum and sister on the phone.
Tea, chocolate and Netflix with the kids all quiet in bed.
Holidays in the sun with the kids.
A nice meal and glass of wine with my husband.
Finishing (not starting!) a run😅
Drinks out with friends
Having the house neat and tidy and clean

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Waiting42021 · 24/06/2020 11:22

Eating a lovely meal with my husband.

Lighting a new candle.

Curling up in a chair and watching the rain outside.

Spending time alone, just pottering, maybe baking or cooking.

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beelover · 24/06/2020 11:26

My family make me the happiest. Three DC all grown now and settled with lovely partners and all with delightful DC of their own. My DH who I still love dearly after 43 years of marriage, we met and married young but always knew he was the only one for me and luckily he seems to still like me too Smile.
Its not all been a skip through a romantic chick lit story, we've been through tough times, sad times, tragic times but we're a close family who pull together when we need too and that brings me the greatest joy.

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Happyspud · 24/06/2020 11:58

Oh I forgot! Doing a M&S shop of easy meals and nice treats to make the weekend easier!

So maybe money does help. I also have a beautiful and recently renovated and landscapes home and garden which has become my haven and makes me feel so happy.

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BadLad · 24/06/2020 12:04

A plate of delicious food.
Getting an Amazon parcel.
Man United losing.
Sancerre.
Any film which is "so bad it's good".
A dogshit with a footprint in it.

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Colom · 24/06/2020 12:23

Time away from my DC to pursue my own interests.
Drinks in the sunshine with friends/family.
Travel and staying in lovely hotels.
Professional success and recognition (love a bit of ego stroking Grin)

I've recently started to finally enjoy my DC. I was always too overwhelmed before and found the baby years so incredibly soul destroying. They're now 2.5 and almost four and the good times are starting to poke through! I envisage a lot of happy days to come.

In answer to your question about money. I don't think money can make you happy if other areas of your life are lacking, but if you're content with your situation family/partner/job etc. then money can make life even better. We're not loaded but comfortable and it makes me happy being able to plan trips away/days out without having to worry about costs (well to an extent!) it also means I have a lovely house and this also makes me happy - only when it's tidy though which is rare!

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Bargebill19 · 24/06/2020 12:35

Not having to worry about money is a start by that I mean knowing I can pay the petrol bill or car tax, buy some cat treats etc.
But other than that - a good book, a cup of tea, my cats and a piece of cake make me happy. Beside a fire in winter is also good.

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