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AIBU?

Serving guests out of date food

37 replies

beebeebeeb · 22/06/2020 08:24

My father in law will buy reduced expiring meat/other fresh produce, and serve it to guests a few days after use by date. Think things like expired pâté, expired salmon from the fish counter, expired desserts with fresh cream, expired chicken. Anything from 2-5 days expired if it makes a difference.

He grew up in Africa, and obviously now has a cast iron stomach! Perhaps should add he is now very rich (buying reduced food must be how he managed it!) He will also leave soft unpasteurized cheeses on the radiator for days before eating them Envy

I have emetophobia and always feel anxious about eating at theirs as I have no idea if I'm going to get ill.

I am of course happy to eat out of date bread, fruit, veg etc if no visible mould on it. But draw the line at expired fresh food!!!

We had a New Years Eve party and FIL bought a load of expired cooked meats and party food nibbles (all expired Christmas day). Obviously people had no idea and ate them Blush hopefully no one got ill, or maybe they thought it was just a hangover!

Would you serve guests food like this (ie. you may eat it yourself at home, but would you serve it to guests)?

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contrmary · 22/06/2020 08:32

No, I wouldn't serve expired food to other people unless I hated them and hoped to make them ill. I sometimes use food after the use by date myself although a week as in your Xmas/New Year example is taking it a bit far even for personal use.

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LellyMcKelly · 22/06/2020 08:32

If it smells and looks ok, it’s ok.

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RememberTheSunnierDays · 22/06/2020 08:33

If it’s freezable and it’s frozen on it before the use by, then I would as I do that now anyway for us. What I wouldn’t do is keep things on the side or in the fridge which had gone past the use by and serve to people.

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Meredithgrey1 · 22/06/2020 08:36

I have emetophobia too and would never eat expired meat/fish even if it smelled fine. I'd really struggle to eat at his house if it were me.

Expired desserts with cream I might eat the day after the expiry date if it smelled ok - I'd probably taste a bit of the cream first to check it. I wouldn't serve it to other people though unless they were ok with it.
For the Christmas party food nibbles, had he definitely not frozen them and defrosted them? I wouldn't serve that to people unless they were ok with it, I probably have some friends who, if I said "I've got these nibbles, but they're out of date", would give them a sniff and eat them no problem.

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UnfinishedSymphon · 22/06/2020 08:39

He leaves soft cheese on the radiator for days and still eats it? Nah, sorry, that would be so obviously off I'd doubt anyone would eat that

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JustC · 22/06/2020 08:44

No, never for guests. For us as a family I just use my common sense and judge by smell, looks, how much past due or best by etc. But you never know how sensitive someone else is.

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Pebble21uk · 22/06/2020 08:53

You are describing my FIL exactly!! He also serves out of date salmon, meats and cheeses. He's also wealthy yet his main hobby seems to be looking for yellow ticket items in supermarkets!
The final straw came for me when he served shellfish on one special occasion dinner and I was violently ill a couple of hours later!!
Now, we are very, very careful as to what we eat there when visiting! My partner is completely in agreement with me so that makes life easier. We take lots of snacks with us when going to stay for a few days, only eat what we deem safe at meals with them and then stock up on our own stuff in our room later or go out to eat if possible!

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MayFayre · 22/06/2020 09:09

No, I wouldn’t. I’d feel awful if someone got sick afterwards.

I won’t eat meat or fish that’s beyond its date, even if it smells fine. I don’t have emetophobia but was once very ill after having some salmon that was a day over and it has put me off taking risks with food ever since.

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Jellybeansincognito · 22/06/2020 09:12

I really don’t understand comments like this one:

‘ If it smells and looks ok, it’s ok.’ The bacteria that cause food poisoning do not have a smell, and actually in date food can make you unwell too.

You would be none the wiser if you ate food that contained illness causing bacteria.

Expired food should not be ingested.

Absolutely no logic to that at all, if it was that easy, no one would get food poisoning.

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CarolVordermansArse · 22/06/2020 09:13

Soft cheese - do you mean the blue cheeses that already have mould? I always leave my blue cheese out of the fridge before eating it because it is better ripe. Wouldn't go as far as putting it on the radiator though.

We are living on reduced out of date food as much as possible and no illness at all. It is stored correctly or frozen and checked very carefully before I serve it. Have had a couple of things that have been off when defrosted which I put down to people having dumped it in the wrong place in the supermarket because they were too lazy to return it to the fridge, but that is all. I am very careful about everything we eat, being ill is not an option.

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Jellybeansincognito · 22/06/2020 09:15

there is no way you can be careful with out of date foods though, it is literally false sense of security.

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SnowsInWater · 22/06/2020 09:17

It depends what you mean by expired. There is a difference in "use by" dates and "best before". Cheese should ideally be left out of the fridge for a while before you eat it if you want it to have any flavour.

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beebeebeeb · 22/06/2020 14:04

@RememberTheSunnierDays completely agree if it's been frozen in that time, not a problem at all. But what he is serving has been in the fridge for that time.

@Pebble21uk

@Meredithgrey1 yes I struggle a bit with it, I always feel slightly anxious and nauseous for meals at theirs now. I think they must think I hardly eat anything. When they made a veggie chilli for vegetarian guests who had to cancel I ate 3 platefuls as it was only veg and tinned things! Grin

@Pebble21uk YES that is absolutely my FILs favourite hobby! Luckily I've told them I don't like seafood, so don't have to eat that! Phew!

@CarolVordermansArse can be blue cheese, or soft cheeses like brie or camembert

@SnowsInWater I mean 'use by' as stated in my OP with regards to meat, fish, etc

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redribbons99 · 22/06/2020 14:13

No way would I ever do tht but if it happened to me I'd never know inless I got I'll after

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Zoikes · 22/06/2020 14:19

Get him and MIL a cooking course for next birthday/christmas - couples education style Grin

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Alittleshortforaspacepooper · 22/06/2020 14:23

If it looks and smells Ok I wouldn't give a shit

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Alittleshortforaspacepooper · 22/06/2020 14:24

Actually I would give a shit if it was seafood. But I've never liked seafood anyway...

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beebeebeeb · 22/06/2020 14:25

@Zoikes they are actually both very good cooks! Just a shame about the age of some of the ingredients Grin I will generally eat what MIL is happy to eat (she's not as bad as FIL!)

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Hillarious · 22/06/2020 14:27

In lockdown, we finally ate the puy lentils I'd bought before my daughter was born, and she's 23.

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beebeebeeb · 22/06/2020 14:31

@hillarious Wow! I love lentils, they wouldn't last that long in my house!

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beautifulxdisasters · 22/06/2020 14:31

I sometimes use 2ish days out of date meat for me and DP if it still smells ok but I wouldn't serve it to the kids or for guests!

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HowFastIsTooFast · 22/06/2020 14:41

@Jellybeansincognito

I really don’t understand comments like this one:

‘ If it smells and looks ok, it’s ok.’ The bacteria that cause food poisoning do not have a smell, and actually in date food can make you unwell too.

You would be none the wiser if you ate food that contained illness causing bacteria.

Expired food should not be ingested.

Absolutely no logic to that at all, if it was that easy, no one would get food poisoning.

But if food that is in date can be just as risky, then what do you suggest we do eat? Hmm

I regularly cook and eat fresh meat (that has been stored correctly) a day or two after it's 'use by' and eggs/dairy a few days after that, so long as they look, feel, smell and taste fine. I think it's an absolute travesty that fruit and veg includes a 'use by' date at all as it should be very clear to anyone with half a brain if it's still edible or not. I have never, not once, had food poisoning.

The amount of perfectly edible food we casually throw away in the western world is an absolute scandal and it's one perpetuated by these ridiculous dates that are attached to everything. The human race managed to survive quite well for thousands of years without being told when and when not to eat their chicken.
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Zoikes · 22/06/2020 14:42

[quote beebeebeeb]@Zoikes they are actually both very good cooks! Just a shame about the age of some of the ingredients Grin I will generally eat what MIL is happy to eat (she's not as bad as FIL!)[/quote]
They will be even better cooks if they learn proper food prep! Very good cooks tend not to poison guests.

Please don't tell us they run a restaurant and need Ramsey to come round and bollock them for the state of their fridge...

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Jellybeansincognito · 22/06/2020 15:38

@ HowFastIsTooFast it isn’t just as risky but it certainly isn’t risk less.

Best before dates can be ignored to your hearts content. Use by dates should never be ignored. It doesn’t matter how something smells, it can still make you unwell.

Use by dates on meat are determined by testing and based on the date of the animals death, It really isn’t safe to eat after the use by, and with any animal, it can start decomposing quicker, which is why sometimes meat can smell bad before it’s reached it use by date.

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AnnoyingPigeon · 22/06/2020 15:48

"I am of course happy to eat out of date bread, fruit, veg etc if no visible mould on it. But draw the line at expired fresh food!!!"

I also have emetophobia and these are also my rules. Anything chilled (coleslaw, stuff like that) or meat, fish etc, would need to be eaten by the use by date, preferably before. I'm religious about chilling cooked food - that gets eaten the next day and no later. We have a thermometer for meat, and I write the date on jars that go in the fridge, so I know when they were opened.

The cheese on a radiator though....why would he do that?

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