To think some people(22 Posts)
Join the discussion
To use this feature subscribe to Mumsnet Premium - get first access to new features see fewer ads, and support Mumsnet.Start using Mumsnet Premium
Always land on their feet no matter how they behave? Thinking of my next door neighbour. We do not get along mainly because she is very selfish and self entitled.
She has cheated several times over the years and caused great pain but now met a man who adores the ground she walks on and they are genuinely extremely happy. She earns a huge amount of money but can wfh full time. She is physically healthy but drinks tons of alcohol and suspected to take drugs. She has an amazing social life (Well, not at the minute ) and always on holiday. She is close to his family and her children all adore her despite her cheating on their dads. She had a nanny who she treated like dirt but now has her boyfriend doing all the childcare.
I have never seen anyone land on their feet as she has. Does karma really exist when someone causes so much pain but has an amazing life?
Or you could read that up to now, she's never been in a relationship that totally fulfils her, juggles the emotional fallout from her ex's and the damage thats done to her kids, needs the busy social life because she needs to decompress from her job and being a single parent, and drugs and alcohol are a sign of someone who isn't coping to be honest.
Its all about perspective - the grass isn't always greener.
Hmm maybe. But still doesn't seem right that just because her partners were not enough for her, she cheated then met someone who she finally feels she doesn't have to cheat on. That seems very lucky to me and very unfair on the exes.
She has 50/50 with her exes so not completely a single paremt especially as she has her boyfriend living with her as well.
How do you even know all that about your neighbour???
Some people do. That's life. Crack on with yours.
We hear about men like this all the time but you don't think women should be able to do this as well?
You are in your post and you are in using a clickbait style title.
Doesn't make sense PP?
To answer the other question, I have had the misfortune of living next to her for many years
You don’t know that she’s physically healthy, nobody can say for sure what is going on with someone else’s body (or even our own sometimes).
And just like bodies, we only see portions of people’s lives - not the full story. Just because someone is perceived to live a certain way doesn’t mean that’s always the case. He might come back to her but they might be miserable and stay together for the kids, who knows what goes on behind closed doors.
But it’s not worth worrying over. Concentrate on your own happiness and remember everything is not as it seems.
Sorry. I just see my niece who is 35, has suspected Paget breast disease, 2 chronic autoimmune diseases, lost all her friends from it, lost her job due to coronavirus and yet is the kindest, most loving person. It feels I am losing my faith recently. Especially when I see people like my neighbour sho is the exact opposite and is just loving life and being treated so well despite how she treats others.
Sorry. Just having a moment. Life is bloody unfair.
She’ll cheat. No question about it-it’s clearly just a matter of time .
Warpdrive has hit the nail on the head!
It is definitely all about perspective and she might well have a lot to cope with that you don't know about.
Would her being poor,miserable and drunk in a ditch make your niece's situation any better,?
Well... That's life isn't it! There's murderers and rapists walking round till they're in their 90s, some never caught and punished, and yet my two lovely parents were both dead before the age of 60. Life isn't fair. But I'd go crazy if I kept thinking that way and comparing everyone's lives.
There is no such thing as 'karma'. When you say karma (and mean horrible people will eventually get what's coming to them) it's nothing more than wishful thinking.
There's no balancing force in the universe. If someone does something horrible then 20 years later break their leg, the two are unrelated.
Life's unfair and then you die.
Life isn't fair. It tends to be felt more when you compare yourself to peers, but taking a step back and looking at broader inequalities is all you need to do to realise this. Some people are born into wealth and never have to do a day's work in their lives; some people are born into a poverty cycle. Some people are born healthy, others are born with disabilities. People like to talk about 'karma' because it makes them feel better, but there is no such thing. All you can do is make the most of what you have, and not make things feel worse by comparing yourselves to others.
I'd love to know what she says about you!
Ime landing on your feet is a matter of perspective. I’ve felt that I always land on my feet but that’s just because I don’t let life’s difficulties phase me. Looking at your neighbours situation you seem to be focusing on the positives. Your neighbour may only see the natives, multiple failed marriages with split custody children (another on the way most likely), less money than some, possible alcohol dependency etc etc.
Your neighbour really doesn’t seem like someone in a good place by your description, I doubt she lands on her feet any more than the average person, you just think she does.
Your neighbour is nothing to with your neice it's a bizarre comparison.
Anyway why are you so nterested in this woman's life? 'Have you asked yourself that?
Comparison is the thief of joy.
I could almost understand your attitude to this woman if she had wronged you, but unless I am missing something, her actions may have hurt others but had no effect on your life at all. So why the moral judgement on her behaviour?
You will never be happy while you place so much energy on what your neighbour is doing. Focus on your own life and try and be happy for her good fortune.
Join the discussion
Please login first.