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to ask if living through the pandemic has prompted any big life decisions for you?

(92 Posts)
BoxAndKnife Tue 16-Jun-20 15:29:33

I know there have been a few threads about shopping locally, flying less etc, but I've been wondering how many people are planning to make, or have made, even bigger life decisions due to the current situation?

It might sound a bit OTT but these last few months have made me really think about what is important to me, what I really want from life. I'm not quite there yet with the decision-making but getting off the treadmill of commute - office - commute - sleep - commute - office etc will definitely figure! I want to be able to spend more time doing things I actually enjoy rather than just working to pay the bills. I've also re-evaluated whether or not I want to go back to study - more stress, more deadlines, more expense. Instead DH and I have been talking about moving far away from London, working less, living much more cheaply / simply etc.

But the bills do still have to be paid!

Anyone else? It would be good to know I'm not alone in my midlife, pandemic-prompted crisis grin

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HowFastIsTooFast Tue 16-Jun-20 15:50:15

Well, DP and I decided to live together 'temporarily' during lockdown, which as of this weekend when he hands his keys back to his landlady is now permanent, and we've realised that reducing our social life to zero and getting by for months on less income has actually been absolutely fine, so as of this week we're also TTC! smile

BoxAndKnife Tue 16-Jun-20 15:57:50

Ahhh, that's lovely Howfast, good luck!

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Talksense Tue 16-Jun-20 15:58:18

I’m a full time carer for an adult family member.

We decided a couple of years ago it was worth me giving up my career as I got sick of paid carers being flakey/not really ‘earning’ anything as it all went on care.

When lockdown happened I realised that my life was no different. I rarely went to the shop (I used to class going to B&M a treat as that means that someone would be watching my family member for an hour). I never really saw friends and life was essentially the same. I never really realised until I heard people moaning about not being able to go out/socialising/normal life and it made me reflect.

I’m going back to work part-time so at least if a friend calls me I’ve got something to talk about.

GrumpyHoonMain Tue 16-Jun-20 15:59:39

House move to be closer to family. Possibly a job change further down the line - I want a job that allows me to work mostly from home

BoxAndKnife Tue 16-Jun-20 16:06:48

That's a big one for me too GrumpyHoonMain - working from home has given me a flexibility that I am going to find really difficult to give up and so I am going to fight to maintain it in my current job, or look for something else.

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PinkRoseBouquets Tue 16-Jun-20 16:07:09

It has made me start to eat more healthier and start intermittent fasting. I have cooked lots of new recipes and have found a love of healthy food. It sounds like a small thing but my diet pre-lockdown was really unhealthy with lots of takeaways and fast food so it's a huge difference to me. I feel like it has given me a much better relationship with food.

CastleCrasher Tue 16-Jun-20 16:07:10

I'm not going to commute as much. I wanted to cut down on it pre-lockdown, but even more so now. Have already arranged that.

I won't be climbing the ladder any more for a while. I'm now being offered jobs that I previously aspired to, but this situation has taught me that while I could actually do them more easily than I thought, I don't actually want to.

BoxAndKnife Tue 16-Jun-20 16:08:31

Although actually I think I've come to the end of the line with my current job and really want a new sort of challenge.

Working for myself is a bit scary though especially as the current situation has really shown how precarious being self-employed can be. although i'm tired of my current job I do feel lucky to have the security.

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iamtheoneandonlyyy Tue 16-Jun-20 16:13:25

Becoming single mum of 3. Daunting

NewtonWasRight Tue 16-Jun-20 16:18:39

won't be climbing the ladder any more for a while

This.

I've realized that my working full-time in a stressful role (which requires more than full-time hours, massively impacting on my non-work life) isn't worth it.

The costs associated with work (not just commuting, but having to live within commuting distance of work, clothing, tax advisor/accounts, etc) simply don't add up when you consider number of hours worked on the average week.

Put bluntly, stepping down into a job with less responsibility and fewer hours and more local would pay dividends... Mentally, timewise, etc.

I can only step down so far due to bills but I'm in the process of planning to stop being a driven worker bee... It's been a waste of years that I can't get back.

I don't know why I've never stopped and wondered why I'm working so hard. Beyond the point where I can afford my bills that is. I've just always pushed into the next challenge.

Fuck. That.

Bluetrews25 Tue 16-Jun-20 16:28:53

HowFast - awww. Good luck. Great to hear something positive.

BoxAndKnife Tue 16-Jun-20 17:10:49

I've just always pushed into the next challenge

Yes, me too. The next promotion, the next qualification. I was just about to apply for PhD funding, not because I desperately want to do a PhD but because in my job, 'that's next'. And over the last few months I've just been thinking, why? I don't even particularly enjoy my job, why do I want to get even more bloody qualifications in it?

So...I've just, in the last 30 mins, signed up for a foundation course in yoga teacher training instead grin

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BoxAndKnife Tue 16-Jun-20 17:13:26

iam - flowers

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NothingIsWrong Tue 16-Jun-20 17:19:05

I haven't made any concrete decisions, but something needs to change. We were on a treadmill of work - clubs - food - sleep repeat and it wasn't doing any of us any good.

I have a good secure local authority job, DH is self employed but he earns multiples of what I do. We thought his business would be very badly affected, but that turns out not to have been the case. It would make all our lives easier for me to be at home, so it's something I'm considering more seriously than before.

And once we are on an even keel, I would like to start a business from home.

LellyMcKelly Tue 16-Jun-20 17:25:55

I’m the same. I love my job as it is - it’s a professional role with plenty of autonomy and variety, and a reasonable, though not huge, salary. I was expecting to think about the next stage but actually it would involve me managing staff which would mean a. Having to sort out their shit, b. Do all the boring stuff like Rotas and appraisals, c. Do less of the stuff I actually liked so I could do the boring Management crap, d. Sit in boring meetings to talk about the boring management crap. It’s not really worth it for an extra £5k before tax. The other thing is that we will probably be restructuring. I work in a very niche area that’s much in demand but that very few colleagues could do, so I’m more protected from cuts than if I was a generic manager.

DDIJ Tue 16-Jun-20 17:26:07

I have been working towards moving into a car for some time now and I haven't been able to come up with a workaround. It will be a while before I can afford a car but I think would have been arrested for doing this during lockdown.

BlusteryLake Tue 16-Jun-20 17:37:07

I have nailed the home workout. I doubt I'll ever go back to group classes. Also, I won't be so worried about my children doing lots of clubs. 2 each will be fine, if that is what they want.

Smokeyrobinson Tue 16-Jun-20 19:40:28

I've decided to retire!! In the autumn I'll be caring part-time for my darling grandson when my daughter's mat leave ends. I'm so excited to be free as I loathe being stuck behind a desk in an office.

NewName89 Tue 16-Jun-20 19:48:40

I pulled out of a flat purchase at the last minute. I realized I don't want to live in central London and will buy further out, something with more space and maybe even a garden.

Littleblackdress04 Tue 16-Jun-20 19:49:57

I’d quite like to separate from my partner of 20 years I think and father to my 2 kids. Literally can’t bear to be in same room as him!

Frokni Tue 16-Jun-20 19:56:44

@smokey that sounds like a great plan! Way better than work. My mum did the same and it was great for all of us.

I agree with PP and nailing home workouts. Feel like the gym is a distant memory. I have accepted, finally, I do not want a career. I have never enjoyed pressured work (teacher in behavioural units, amongst several other jobs) and I just don't want the grind again. Am journaling my ideas for jobs which will have no stress/work to bring home with me.

Littleblackdress04 Tue 16-Jun-20 19:59:26

@DDIJ what do you mean ‘move into a car’?! Do you mean a camper van? Or an actual car

TeenPlusTwenties Tue 16-Jun-20 20:01:53

We're looking for a dog for DD - she has wanted one for 13 years, we've been reluctant up to now, but it is the right thing to do for her.

TheDogsMother Tue 16-Jun-20 20:05:22

I have decided to go against financial wisdom and plunder my pension to pay off the mortgage. I should add that I'm self employed and have saved for years to build a pension but I'm also self employed in a job that is likely to be screwed for the foreseeable future so i need to remove the worry.

Probably go to the pub less 😂

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