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To not want my kids to grow up

(31 Posts)
LesleyA Mon 15-Jun-20 21:08:17

Well besides being grateful that they are growing up naturally is anyone else feeling so sad that the years of them being little and the demands being ‘sweeter’ than school projects, anxiety about getting periods, learning difficulties, lifting, exams etc etc. I’m absolutely yearning for the days that they would giggle, smile with tiny white teeth, smell like bubble bath and a day of fun at bedtime,etc etc

OP’s posts: |
DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult Mon 15-Jun-20 21:11:53

No, the alternative is fucking soul destroying, so I embrace each new phase, its exciting to see who they are growing up to be.

GinDaddyRedux Mon 15-Jun-20 21:12:40

ok

Napqueen1234 Mon 15-Jun-20 21:13:14

I’m in those small kids years and have been really really struggling during lockdown. This post has really jolted me to realise I need to make the most of all the sweet moments (there are so many) every day and enjoy them being small. Thank you

Musicforsmorks Mon 15-Jun-20 21:16:02

Sorry but spooky thread title 😁

LindaLovesCake Mon 15-Jun-20 21:22:31

I thought you meant you wanted to murder them because they were getting on your lockdown nerves!😵

I love mine getting older and becoming lovely people who I want to spend time with. I’ve got friends who’ve had more dc and they are still going to soft play fourteen years later.

whiteroseredrose Mon 15-Jun-20 21:28:03

I know what you mean! I love my late teen / adult DC but I miss them at 3 and 6, 7 and 10 - all ages really.

That's why the end of the film About Time makes me sob every time.

namesnamesnamesnames Mon 15-Jun-20 21:47:23

I love 'now'. My children are all young, my eldest is old enough to have fun and late movie nights with but young enough to be innocent. Your thread title though, they're words no-one will ever, ever hear come from my mouth. We have faced bereavement of a child in our family (not my own child). I feel that people who say it aren't really thinking first.

ToBBQorNotToBBQ Mon 15-Jun-20 22:06:42

Teen household. Completely know what you mean OP. I'm working every day still but am loving having the extra family time.

LEELULUMPKIN Mon 15-Jun-20 22:13:06

I used to think this about my DNephew who was as close to me as a little brother. He died suddenly at 14.

I also thought the same about my own DS who is now 15 has severe learning difficulties and the mental age of a 4 year old and will need care 24/7 for the rest of his life. Our eternal Peter Pan.

I've learned to be very careful for what I wish for.

Windyatthebeach Mon 15-Jun-20 22:15:02

Ime having adult dc is even more stressful than small ones...

GrumpyHoonMain Mon 15-Jun-20 22:18:32

Live in the moment

funinthesun19 Mon 15-Jun-20 22:20:09

I have moments where I think this too. But mainly I think about how precious each stage is. The memories of the past will always be there to think and look back on. Just embrace each stage as they come and enjoy now for what it is smile

Smallsteps88 Mon 15-Jun-20 22:21:59

My youngest is now for secondary school in September. He has SEN so struggles with school anyway and has been so relaxed and happy during this lockdown. Without the social pressure he has been free to indulge his childlike interests and secondary school is going to hit him like a wall. He’ll be one of the youngest in the year group too. I’m enjoying every moment of how sweet and happy he is. I hate that this next year will knock it all out of him. sad

Anotherdayanotherdollar Mon 15-Jun-20 22:22:56

Your children growing up is a privilege denied to far too many. Embrace the people they are becoming.

CrazyTimesAreOccurring Mon 15-Jun-20 22:28:07

I know what you mean OP. The days are long but the years are short, I remember reading that once.
But each new stage is exciting too. As a PP said, seeing what they will become

BogRollBOGOF Mon 15-Jun-20 22:30:15

The best course is that they do grow up from helpless newborns to independent adults, and our role as parents is to nurture that and guide them through.

Some phases suit some children/ parents more than others. It's nice to look back (and I'm fortunate that there is so much record of photos and video to jog my memory maybe not so much for the DCs... )some phases are harder, but always we move forwards and children grow and develop on.

Iusedtobecarmen Mon 15-Jun-20 22:31:19

Yes, yes ,yes.
I will write more tomorrow, but mine growing up (selfishly) upsets me.

I miss them being little.
I dont think the OP meant anything sinister with the
thread title and knew exactly what she meant.
Sorry for those who have lost a child before they had chance to grow up though.

Daftodil Mon 15-Jun-20 22:31:33

That's why the end of the film About Time makes me sob every time.

@whiteroseredrose, me too!! 😭😭😭

ssd Mon 15-Jun-20 22:32:29

My ds used to cry and have to be torn off me going into nursery. He couldn't bare me leaving.
Tonight I dropped something off at the steps of his flat, I said are you coming home at all this week? (hoping he'd say yes) he said naahhh...

I'm so proud of him and I adore him, but I miss the wee boy he was sad

Wearywithteens Mon 15-Jun-20 22:38:08

I don’t miss the endless exhausting drudgery of having little children. My DH gets misty eyed about those days but to me it was just endless boring whinyness interspersed with racing round clipping them into car seats for pointless activities interspersed with ear infections/viruses interspersed with endless samey awful boring school events...

Love my teenagers though. Enjoy gossip, laughs, fun grown up things like shopping, pubs, theatre, box sets, trips etc.

Monkeynuts18 Mon 15-Jun-20 22:38:42

I know what you mean OP. I have one DS who is nearly 11 months and he’s just so lovely I can’t imagine him being any lovelier than he is now if that makes sense?

ssd Mon 15-Jun-20 22:44:49

Wearywithteens

I don’t miss the endless exhausting drudgery of having little children. My DH gets misty eyed about those days but to me it was just endless boring whinyness interspersed with racing round clipping them into car seats for pointless activities interspersed with ear infections/viruses interspersed with endless samey awful boring school events...

Love my teenagers though. Enjoy gossip, laughs, fun grown up things like shopping, pubs, theatre, box sets, trips etc.

You need a new name then grin

Wearywithteens Mon 15-Jun-20 22:51:22

Ssd - username = I’m weary. Yes, old and knackered. And I have teens.

I’m weary from all those sodding boring primary school years!!!

BackforGood Mon 15-Jun-20 22:55:26

I don't think it is a case of if YABU or not, you feel what you feel.

I agree with SSD and Weary though - the pride of seeing your dc as funny, kind, loving teens and then adults is wonderful. I enjoyed those years as much, if not more than the sleep deprived baby years.

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