My childhood was a bit weird, though the few people I've ever spoken to about it have described it as abusive. I guess it's my normal so I've never really viewed it as such, though I suspect they're probably right.
My father (the main perpetrator) died a couple of years ago, no big deal as we had been NC since I left home at 18. I did however get a pang that I'd never been called to rush to his death bed and hear him profess his distress for the way he'd behaved, and apologise for the father he'd been like in the movies
I and DS are now DM's only family. She adores DS and he her. I do "my bit" but am constantly wary and I certainly wouldn't describe our relationship as close, though that's what she wants.
I struggle to imagine treating DS the way she did me, though I fully appreciate times were different, she herself was in an abusive relationship and was not a strong enough character to walk away (even to protect her children) The biggest issue is how she seems to have excised all the uncomfortable memories, and can paint a vivid picture of our rosy (if poor) childhood.
I don't challenge her on these memories (they're normally relayed when I'm not around in any case) because I can't truly see what the point would be in upsetting an elderly widow who cannot change the past.
So then I considered counselling but I'm afraid the aim of that will be to confront her. Does anyone know if this is likely to be the case or could I make it clear from the outset this is off the cards?
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AIBU?
Can anyone explain what would happen in therapy?
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TreacherousPissFlap · 15/06/2020 12:30
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