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Feel like the country is opening back up but not for people with young kids

(174 Posts)
Bookworm36 Sun 14-Jun-20 11:41:49

I am feeling so so isolated. I had been feeling pretty good until last week. I don't know what happened but a huge wave of sadness just hit me and now I'm waking up each morning feeling miserable.
Im a sahm mum, so in that respect very lucky that I'm not having to juggle work etc. But my life is just completely empty!!
Me and my children have done every activity, game, walk etc that we can think of and we are now all bored out of our minds. I have not spent a single minute alone since 23rd march.
As of tomorrow all shops, town centres etc are opening up. My parents are so happy, theyve been to lovely villages in the countryside, to ironbrige, and are now going to go to Chester, Shrewsbury, Manchester for a lovely day out.
But for me I still feel trapped!! I don't think that taking young kids to these places is a good idea, so we are still just going to be stuck with at home, with bad weather at the moment too sad
I didn't really have much of a social life before all this, but the problem has been magnified by lockdown. I'm seeing other people having fun nights with family and friends on zoom etc. We have none of that. When this is over I am going to make some positive changes and I'm trying to focus on that but anyone else feeling really isolated?

OP’s posts: |
littleyikes Sun 14-Jun-20 12:09:52

Yep, feeling the same. Even a week or so back when everyone's off to the garden centres etc. I just felt stuck. Trying to take a young child to 'shops' whilst observing social distancing isn't going to be enjoyable, so I'm just avoiding it completely.

AhhCorona Sun 14-Jun-20 12:52:04

It's hit me in this last week. My kids don't play golf, tennis or enjoy social distancing. I looked at taking them to Beth Chatto's garden for a wander round, but kids are only allowed in for the last hour of the day.
More than anything they want a splash around in our local chlorine drenched swimming pool which hasn't got any sign of opening. No toy library no book library..... the kids have even rumbled they've been painting the fence with water.
Sorry, no help, but I hear you.

MrMorrisReturns Sun 14-Jun-20 12:53:15

Yanbu even though kids are at less risk

Camomila Sun 14-Jun-20 13:18:08

Are you a single parent? If so, could you bubble up with someone?
If you have a DH/DP is there any time you can leave the DC with them and go to the park or somewhere for some peace and quiet by yourself?

Dumbie Sun 14-Jun-20 13:24:05

Gardens of the big country houses are open, zoos and farms are opening up in a few weeks. Hopefully you can find somewhere local to book up?

We went to some gardens last weekend, it was a bit showery but we stuck our rain jackets on and went.
They had an ice cream truck there, which was a nice treat that we'd taken for granted before. Had a picnic in the gardens, loads and loads of space because they restrict the numbers.

Duckchick Sun 14-Jun-20 13:33:37

I feel the same. I'm on mat leave with DC3, with a 3 year old DC2 who used to be at home 3 days a week. None of the stuff I relied on for adult interaction to keep me sane is reopening, not the toddler groups, not the classes, not the library. Meeting friends is difficult because if they have older children they aren't back in primary school yet, and if they have kids the same age as mine trying to keep them socially distanced is very difficult.

My ILs, who are in their 60s and therefore part of the higher risk population we have shut down the country to save, have got most of their life back. They are playing golf, visiting several national trust properties a week and meeting friends for picnics. It doesn't feel fair.

BogRollBOGOF Sun 14-Jun-20 13:42:39


The roolz ban normal sized families from meeting, and while I consider that a couple of spare children who haven't been anywhere other than their house ot out for a walk to be of zero additional risk, a lot of people do seem to be taking it seriously so the children who are still excluded from school still have no normal interractions beyond their households. Again the roolz state that children can't play naturally because clapping games, swapping pokemon cards, tackling for a football can't be done at a 2m distance. Again, I'm not particularly concerned, but because others are or they've just used up their limited contact on other people.

It took an outcry over several zoos warning of imminent ruin to get the go ahead to open up, something like 6 weeks after garden centres.

The only real change to my childrens' lives now compared to 12 weeks ago is that we can drive to some other parks with other padlocked playgrounds and queue up for a McDriveThru. Yet their chances of dying from Covid 19 are in the league of being struck by ligtning.
Cost benefit analysis, highest social cost for the least benefit. But who cares when they're not voting in the next 9/ 11 years. It's not like they're real humans that matter is it. (That's without going into SEND support or abuse...)

weepingwillow22 Sun 14-Jun-20 13:44:17

I feel the same. Plus my eldest is autistic and sensory seeking, he does not understand social distancing and tries to put everything in his mouth. No idea when we will be able to go out again.

MorganKitten Sun 14-Jun-20 13:46:55

Outdoor places like zoos and places like legoland are opening too which will great for those with children

Sirzy Sun 14-Jun-20 13:49:08

But zoos and similar are opening so there are things for children to do.

Shops aren’t opening with the intention of people going and spending a leisurely day mooching so if people are going in with that expectation they are going to be sadly disappointed!

Inmyownlittlecorner Sun 14-Jun-20 13:52:30

Mine are 10 & 7, so not little, but we have exhausted all of our options. We live in a Flat (tiny & gardenless) in C London & in normal circumstances are out nearly all of the time regardless of weather.
Now the Zoo is open I might dip into our ever dwindling savings & get an annual pass, we’re not too far from Camden & it would take under an hour to walk to it. I’m seriously considering going to ikea one evening as something different to do!

Mummydaydreams Sun 14-Jun-20 13:56:51

Feel the same, I was staying positive but feeling really emotional all the time. Going for walks when I can but near impossible to social distance or even move far in one direction with two toddlers. Feel unwelcome near shops and people and very isolated and hopeless right now.

Sailingblue Sun 14-Jun-20 13:56:57

I agree. It is really hard to even go to the supermarket with a small child. I went to an RHS garden and it was nice for the children to have space to roam. I’d recommend it if there is something near you. It won’t solve the isolation but will be a change of scenery.

Dairyfairies Sun 14-Jun-20 13:57:43

yanbu. It's also shit for non keyworker parents as many companies want staff back in the office despite what government is saying. my DC cannot access school. one is severely autistic with and EHCP. I have been WFH despite being a lone parent and no school place and now face dismissal as management wants everyone back but I cannot as I have no childcare. It really sucks.

MonsterMunchAndHoolaHoops Sun 14-Jun-20 14:03:13

Oh OP, sorry you feel this way. We are heading off to the zoo next weekend, and to Legoland the week it opens in July. Tickets for both have been purchased!! And loads still available. We've also found some great walks a short drive from us, have been treating ourselves to drive through MacDonald's, and last weekend my little one had a playdate with his buddies in the garden - first time he's seen them in months! I feel like the country is opening up again and it's great!

Unless your little ones are shielding, why don't you get out to the zoo, book a trip to a theme park, or head off to MacDonald's. There's loads for kids starting up and it's so nice to be getting out in the world again.

The risk to kids is so so so mild. Both mine have now had coronavirus and it was barely noticeable. I know some kids get it badly, but the risk of that is so so so so small. Really, it's a tiny tiny risk.

GrapefruitsAreNotTheOnlyFruit Sun 14-Jun-20 14:03:57

Any chance you could sign up to a local cricket club and get your children involved in that? Ours are letting children back in groups of 5. We are doing it for every allowable minute and it's cheering everyone up.

InspectorCludo Sun 14-Jun-20 14:05:45

We have one zoo that we can travel to. It costs £12 per person and none of the play equipment inside or outside will be open. I don’t think there is enough to keep my kids busy for 3 hours with so much closed even if we took a picnic. Plus the cost is very prohibitive.
I want to take one of my children out to the shops next week but the toilets aren’t open yet and I dont want to use public transport so unless I pay a fortune for the town centre car park, that’s off the table too.
It’s very depressing.

countchocula Sun 14-Jun-20 14:05:50

I feel the same, really down about it today.

I don't understand why children (especially sat in a trolly) are not able to go into shops. Or why carparks for our local beaches are shut.

I lost my work overnight and have had to become a SAHM. It's ok so far because my husband is WFH and it feels as though we are in this together.

But I'm absolutely dreading him going back into the office in August (most likely) and me being left at home. Our toddler group won't be happening, can't even do the weekly shop without judgement if I bring her.

The world will be passing us by and we will be trapped. That's how I feel sad

ghostmous3 Sun 14-Jun-20 14:06:35

At least you dont live in wales.
We cant go anywhere at all that isnt within a 5mile radius and even then people are still screaming rules rules if you take your kid to the local park for a kick about

Its fucking shit
My 10 year old refuses to leave the house at all these days shes petrified of getting reported ir shouted at. It's a shame as shes wasting away indoors, wont do any school work and doesn't see the point of life at the moment. I cant help her I feel terrible

GaspingGekko Sun 14-Jun-20 14:06:54

Where I live lockdown is pretty much completely over and has been for a few weeks now. However children under 12 are still banned from anywhere indoors and it's too hot to spend more than 20 minutes or so outside.
Basically life has returned to normal for people without children and those of us with kids are still almost on full lockdown.

And yet they are expecting them to return to school full time in September. It's going to be totally overwhelming for them.

countchocula Sun 14-Jun-20 14:07:50

Should add I'm in Wales, as it's slightly different

RhianFuckingMorris Sun 14-Jun-20 14:08:17

Spare a thought for your Welsh friends. We're still in a lockdown. Can only travel a maximum of 5 miles to meet outside a max of 2 people.
It is a bit shit but I suppose it's now Showing in our low R rate, one of the lowest in the UK.

Hope we can get out and about again soon.

RhianFuckingMorris Sun 14-Jun-20 14:08:55

Cross posted withanother Welsh person grin

squiglet111 Sun 14-Jun-20 14:10:06

I agree with you. Everyone else is important apart from kids.

Seems like most things are opening apart from anything for the kids. Would love to be able to take the kids to the play park. But no, too dangerous! Why can't they open they and say wear facemasks and hand sanitize before and after?

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