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dp says he’s leaving in 3 months no financial help during pandemic

(177 Posts)
flopseyR72 Thu 11-Jun-20 10:30:41

I feel like I can’t make a decision.
dp says he is going to move out of our rented flat in three months it’s 2k a month so I can’t really afford it own
I pay all my dc nursery fees myself already
I was going to buy a house before lockdown in Essex Greater London but now I’m really nervous about a house price crash and recession.
My dd needs to start school in September and has a place locally.
I thought would have moved by now but didn’t do anything during the lockdown
My job is secure nhs
I earn good salary
My dp and me need to split up I don’t like him and I’m not upset about it
I just don’t know what to do about buying moving or renting. I want to give my dp stability I have moved four times since dd 4 was born.
My dp says he can’t afford to give me anything as he’s going to rent himself
I feel really unsure.
What would you do. Buy now although economic recession is looming and local house prices are grossly inflated here or rent somewhere smaller

OP’s posts: |
LouiseTrees Thu 11-Jun-20 10:34:05

It depends how long you will stay in the house. If it’s long term/forever then the economy will recover again. If not perhaps rent just now. Your age is also a factor to consider and over what term you would want to pay a mortgage.

GalwayGrowl Thu 11-Jun-20 10:34:46

Are the DC his?

flopseyR72 Thu 11-Jun-20 10:36:16

Yes his dc 4 and 2.

The house prices are just so high here it makes me worry 750k for 3 bed semi

OP’s posts: |
flopseyR72 Thu 11-Jun-20 10:37:54

Dp doesn’t seem to be interested in kids schooling etc I think he is so selfish

He wanted me to buy a house and let hi. Live in it part time while he got his own place and I said no way and things have just deteriorated and deteriorated

OP’s posts: |
Cutangle Thu 11-Jun-20 10:39:45

Well he doesn’t really get a choice about giving you anything. You will need to go to CMS and start a claim. Also work out if you would be eligible to claim universal credits. UC essentials website gives you the calculation to use.

flopseyR72 Thu 11-Jun-20 10:41:24

I won’t get anything as I a high earner

OP’s posts: |
flopseyR72 Thu 11-Jun-20 10:41:58

I am a high earner around 100k

OP’s posts: |
WhatWouldDominicDo Thu 11-Jun-20 10:42:52

If you can afford it, buy a house. House prices go up and down, but they always go up more than they go down. If it's for the long term, a house price decrease now won't make any difference. Does your local council operate the shared purchase scheme?

And the authorities will decide how much DH will pay you, not him.

WhatWouldDominicDo Thu 11-Jun-20 10:44:16

How much does DH earn?

And are you hell bent on staying in London?

flopseyR72 Thu 11-Jun-20 10:45:55

I can afford it I have money but I was nervous because here Greater London Essex area-house prices have gone through the roof. As I say 3 bed semi for 750k so the scope for a crash and negative equity is high. Then will be stuck here indefinitely if anything changes

OP’s posts: |
flopseyR72 Thu 11-Jun-20 10:47:01

I have my job for ten years senior position so would be difficult to start again new job. They let me work from home a lot so can still look after dc and earn even as a single parent

OP’s posts: |
bigfootfred Thu 11-Jun-20 10:47:07

he has to pay CM go through CMS

flopseyR72 Thu 11-Jun-20 10:48:10

Dp has husband own business but is not working doe to lockdown and was in process of selling so will be effectively retired early. Previously he is earning well as a private proffesional

OP’s posts: |
NoFucksImAQueen Thu 11-Jun-20 10:50:07

You're on 100k but can't afford the rent alone?

flopseyR72 Thu 11-Jun-20 10:50:27

Sorry meant to say dp not my husband. He has is own business , not earning due to lockdown but was planning in process of selling and semi retiring

OP’s posts: |
DarkMintChocolate Thu 11-Jun-20 10:50:40

A mortgage is just a lifetime's rent, discounted back to net present value. Advantages are that it gives DC stability, and you can decorate it how you want. It doesn't matter if house prices go down, as it's irrelevant to you, if you plan to stay there for the next 20 years. Negative equity only affects people, who have to move.

flopseyR72 Thu 11-Jun-20 10:51:50

Well a lot goes on tax take home is not as much as you would think
I have to pay over 1k nursery fees
2k rent
Council tax and bills
I am going to buy soon
It’s really to much for rent

OP’s posts: |
Angeldust747 Thu 11-Jun-20 10:51:51

If you're on 100k your take home is around 5.5k a month, you should be able to afford 2k rent out of that? Would the mortgage payments be less than rent?

PlanDeRaccordement Thu 11-Jun-20 10:52:04

I’d rent a cheaper place for a year. Keep an eye on the market and buy later.

flopseyR72 Thu 11-Jun-20 10:53:41

Yes I am going to buy soon and not rent forever. Estate agent told me to wait a month or two as house prices predicted to fall. It’s more the timing if it and I don’t want to spend 2k on rent.

OP’s posts: |
flopseyR72 Thu 11-Jun-20 10:55:47

It’s not question of buying it’s when, if I lived somewhere cheaper then I wouldn’t worry about house price fluctuations but here you can see a house sold for 500k five years ago now listed for 800k wouldn’t that make you nervous

OP’s posts: |
Quartz2208 Thu 11-Jun-20 10:57:02

I would get rid of him as soon as you can

I would rent for awhile to see how it goes with the house market

and make a claim for CMS - your earnings DO NOT MATTER in this

Fluffycloudland77 Thu 11-Jun-20 11:04:04

Your earnings don’t matter, if you father a child you need to provide something for it.

Too many men shirk and leave it up to the mum.

Angeldust747 Thu 11-Jun-20 11:04:42

Noone can tell you what will happen with the market, if you trust your estate agents opinion then listen to that, but you have to think about your circumstances - is paying your current rent for a few months to reduce the risk worth it, is moving to rent somewhere cheaper woth the upheaval? Honestly I wouldn't expect prices to reduce back to 500k level, and if you're in it for the long haul it won't affect you as pps have said. And definitely put in a cms claim, he should pay for his kids

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