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AIBU?

Support bubbles aibu to be furious.....

260 replies

TriciaH · 10/06/2020 23:39

So basically an adult living alone or single parent can go into another's house. Great for them if they have been alone for 10 weeks. However two working parents both due back into work, one is a lorry driver but schools now have no space for the children as year groups gone back to school mean no room cannot ask for help with kids. One parent is likely going to have to give up work as we have 3 months before the remote chance the children go back to school which still is only likely to be part time. What the heck are we working parents supposed to do.

Am I unreasonable to think the government need to come up with a plan to help keep us mums in our jobs because let's face it we are going to be the ones at home with the kids giving up our career? This is going to put us on a back foot with employers for years.

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TeaAndBrie · 10/06/2020 23:43

Are the children in the year groups that have returned to school or are you both key workers? I don't think school can refuse them if the above applies.
Are you saying you would use family to help with childcare if that was an option?

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aquashiv · 10/06/2020 23:44

If you're a key worker aren't you able to send your kids to school?

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ilovesooty · 10/06/2020 23:47

Why is this relevant to allowing people who live alone access to one other household?

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TriciaH · 10/06/2020 23:48

Nope kids are not years returning to school. One parent is a key worker one is not which puts us priority 5 on school list for a space and they simply don't have spots available. One child in questions autistic but his ehcp is only just in the process of being submitted because school apparently lost the report needed so I sent a copy of mine. Had that been submitted in March when I received my copy if school had not lost it they would have received it back putting him on the vulnerable list giving him a place at school. Other child is 13 so would have been OK for the couple hours we are both at work. One parent nights one day's but few hours cross over and the child with ASD would be a risk to older sibling. His 10 but no way could they be together unsupervised for 5 minutes.

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2007Millie · 10/06/2020 23:49

Unfortunately, in case you hadn't quite realised, we are in the middle of a pandemic.
That means that when decisions are made, they will benefit some more than others.
I appreciate the situation is difficult for you, but you'll gain nothing by moaning

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TriciaH · 10/06/2020 23:50

Because if they can why can't people with two working parents mix with one house hold enabling them to keep their jobs and not risk being unemployed.

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Nowthereistwo · 10/06/2020 23:50

I agree with you OP. At this stage of lock down why can't we create 2 household bubbles and support children of those working as well as the social side.

I'm expected back in the office next week whilst DH WFH and entertains /teaches our 4 & 6yr olds.

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purpleme12 · 10/06/2020 23:51

Well if I was in your position and had relatives willing to help I'd do it anyway to keep The job

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3NMe · 10/06/2020 23:52

It's very difficult for many thousands of households op. We can't say without hindsight what's right or wrong but as a whole, as a country, we've suffered a devastating hit. We need to take small steps to get back to normal

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AtrociousCircumstance · 10/06/2020 23:52

Moan away OP. Sounds fucking difficult.

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TriciaH · 10/06/2020 23:54

@TeaAndBrie yes exactly that if we were able to my parents would watch them as they know how to handle him when distressed. We can't get him into school and I am about 4 weeks from the end of my probabion period in a job I started at beginning of the year. They want me back in the next two weeks and if I say I can't they can just get rid and then I'm jobless for the first time in 17 years.

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Firefliess · 10/06/2020 23:54

I don't think the bubble thing is about childcare. It's about the needs of people who've not had a hug from an adult in nearly three months. YABU if that makes your angry.

Childcare is tough for everyone and I fear many parents (mostly women) will probably decide to give up work because of it. Nannies and childminders are allowed to work though - would either of those work for your family?

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2007Millie · 10/06/2020 23:54

@TriciaH

Quite simply, because that's a higher and more increased risk than a single person .

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Khione · 10/06/2020 23:54

Re your question - You are not being unreasonable.

Re - expecting any different - you are being unreasonable. Do you think BoJo is really interested in 'the little woman',

Get your child into school under key worker guidelines if you can.

Email the government, your MP all the local MPs and counsellors. He who shouts loudest gets heard.

90percent easing helps white middle aged suits so far

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TeaAndBrie · 10/06/2020 23:55

There is logic behind the steps that they have announced. However, that doesn't stop it feeling unfair to you and your situation.

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Khione · 10/06/2020 23:55

middle aged and middle (and higher) class that should read

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PumpkinP · 10/06/2020 23:56

I’m a single parent but I have no one to mix with or help so it won’t benefit me. Like someone else said some things will benefit you some won’t, don’t assume we will all benefit from it!

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CoronaIsComing · 10/06/2020 23:58

@Firefliess I’m sorry but people need jobs more than they need hugs!

@TriciaH in your case, I’d just ignore the rules and ask your parents to look after your DS. At the end of the day, you need to be able to put food on the table.

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ilovesooty · 11/06/2020 00:05

@TriciaH

Because if they can why can't people with two working parents mix with one house hold enabling them to keep their jobs and not risk being unemployed.

I honestly don't think the two situations are in any way related.
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TriciaH · 11/06/2020 00:09

Hugs don't put food on the table. Me keeping my job helps get this country out of debt paying tax, me finding myself unemployed along with thousands of others in my position means we can't survive without support and as a person who has always worked since finishing college with the exception of maternity leave the idea of not working is bizarre. Although I am home schooling two kids at the moment which needs doing I need to support my kids. If I can't go to work because of childcare they miss out.

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ilovesooty · 11/06/2020 00:09

To clarify - I mean that a single person being able to join up with one other household doesn't impact on what is undoubtedly a very difficult and frustrating situation for you.

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TheMotherofAllDilemmas · 11/06/2020 00:10

Well you and your hubby have been side by side through all this, and for what I know most single parents are also working and possibly facing (alone) the same problems you face (in company).

So yes, you are unreasonable for believing that old tripe that most single parents can afford to be SAHPs.

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Crystaltree · 11/06/2020 00:11

In the end no one is actually checking up on all of us. Just use your common sense.

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UnderCaffeinated · 11/06/2020 00:13

I see the logic behind what is allowed for single parents and people who live alone but I also see your point.

My sister has gone back to work (a retail type function) and her partner will have to return in the next week or two. She has three children, two of which are Y1 Twins so can return, but her elder DD is Y5 and cannot return, but the school is not open anyway! No signs of opening until around the 22nd here. My partner is self employed and works from home, and I also work part time from home so we could easily care for her 3 alongside our own child but it's not permitted at the moment. If we could bubble up it would make life a lot easier for her, and the kids would then be cared for by people who love them and there'd be no mixing outside of our bubble!

One of her friends from work is a single parent to two children who can't return to school yet and are in Y3 and Y4, but now she can bubble up with her mum and that will also provide her essential childcare so she can return to work, which is fantastic for her in all ways, not just to let her go back to work. I hope some extra 'bubbling up' will be allowed to take place soon to help in situations like theirs.

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TriciaH · 11/06/2020 00:15

Never did I say they can afford to be stay at home parents. I agree they need the support I just think families with two working parents who are not both keyworkers are being forgotten. Schools no longer have spaces for those children meaning someone has to stop working. All parents need childcare to be available and some cannot afford nannies etc to provide it. They need support too. Plus I can't leave my autistic child with someone he does not know without major issues.

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