Something has just occurred to me. I don’t have sex dreams often at all, but the ones I can remember have all featured people I’d rather eat wasps than shag in real life.
For instance:
- I had a lesbian tryst with a woman who was my riding instructor as a child. She was an old battle axe, even back then. Also, a glaring problem with this dream is that I am most definitely 100% straight.
- I dream-shagged the guy who runs the local kebab shop. He’s a nice guy and I like him, but he’s about 30 years older than me and in no way attractive, IMO. Yet in my dream, my subconscious mind decided to add about 10 stone to him, and turn him into a slimy, lecherous creep, so even worse than the real version of him. And then shag him.
- I shagged my mate who I know has had a crush on me for a while. Again, I like him as a person, but you could put a gun to my head in the waking day and I still couldn’t. Just no.
How messed up is this? It’s a DREAM, ffs. I could be having it off with Brad Pitt, but no, my subconscious mind decides to select the most unattractive people imaginable and goes for it.
Why am I like this? 😭
, I just wish my imagination had better taste.