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AIBU?

To move schools because of Covid?

21 replies

dramalamma · 08/06/2020 08:04

For various reasons one of my children is already at a different school to the other two (all first half of primary). Dd1 and DS are in the local state primary and DD2 is in the local prep. We've already been considering moving DD1 as she's been struggling socially and we think the prep might be more suited to her.
I've just found out that the state school is only planning on (obviously this could change before sept) two days a week in sept to be able to maintain social distancing. The Prep seem to be confident that with their smaller classes they will go back full time for all the kids.
I'm self employed and can be flexible with my timings so childcare isn't really an issue but I am struggling to get them to take me seriously as a teacher so I'm not sure how much they'll get done on their off days even with more teacher input.
I'm tempted to move both DS and DD1 to the prep in September - DS has said he doesn't want to go but he's also said he doesn't DD1 to go and I suspect he's love it as he'll be more academically stretched and he tends to mess around because he's bored in his current class.
So AIBU to move them both across? I guess this is more of a wwyd but YABU= don't move them just because of Covid. YANBU = move them so they get a full education in sept.

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LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood · 08/06/2020 08:27

For most people having primary aged children at different schools (particularly different types of school) is not something that happens by default. It is an active choice. Often agonised over. So it’s impossible to say whether YABU or not as there is no indication as to whether any or all of the reasons that informed the decision to send them to the different schools in the first place still obtain. If there were good reasons at the time then you will need very carefully to analyse if they are still cogent reasons now. Also the age of your son who is saying he doesn’t want to move has some bearing. And how much time he has left in primary.

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Nihiloxica · 08/06/2020 08:34

I think if you can afford to give your children a full time education, then you should.

It looks like the teaching unions are collaborating with the Tories to take this away from most children, and it's unfair that people with enough money will be able to buy what all children used to receive, but you can't fix that.

We know full time education us better for children, so make the best choice for yours. You will be far from alone.

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Epigram · 08/06/2020 08:40

If you can afford it I'd move them.

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Legoandloldolls · 08/06/2020 08:41

If you can afford it then maybe if the state school kids arent going to get a education come September. It's something I'm tempted by.

I have two boys in private SEN school and increasingly private and state dont compare and covid has proven no different.

The only issue is continuing in private for all three into junior and secondary. Can you afford to keep them private longer term?

The thought of my 5 year old getting no education for another year isnt appealing esp when her brothers are.

It's a horrible time.

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Epigram · 08/06/2020 08:41

However personally I'm optimistic that state schools will be back full time in Sept. If the current trend in the death rate continues, no one will be able to justify keeping them off.

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SeasonFinale · 08/06/2020 08:43

If money is not an issue move them.

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Orchidflower1 · 08/06/2020 08:47

If you can afford it I would move. I think the logistics would be very complicated. Also I’m sure you have your reasons for having one in private and two in state but isn’t it going to make the divide more when one is physically going to school and two aren’t?

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Matildatoldsuchdreadfullies · 08/06/2020 08:50

I am snorting at the idea that teaching unions are collaborating with the tories... I think that’s probably the most unlikely conspiracy theory ever.

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Sonotech · 08/06/2020 08:54

If you can afford it do it.

I’m doing similar although my two already go to a prep school. At my current school I’m not convinced at how fast they will be able to pick the reigns back up as they are very ‘relaxed’

My two did great at the start and the work they have been sent home is amazing but they have lost any enthusiasm they had at the start and it’s a battle now.

In your situation I’d do it.

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Aragog · 08/06/2020 08:55

I suspect we will be back, and almost to normal.

My friend's school in China, not Wuhan, has their infants return this week with no masks, no social distancing and full time this week. They'd been off for 20 weeks (think 1 week was a holiday, rather than term time iirr) The school has been closed to all throughout. They opened for teachers a week or so before so they could prepare for the return.

Obviously they have had a much stricter lockdown throughout.

Many of our children have been away from school for 12 weeks, as of today (though 3 of those have been holiday weeks) 20 weeks would take us to August. If we followed a similar pattern we'd be ready to return full time, but with good hygiene measures in place by September. So fingers crossed,

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Test321 · 08/06/2020 08:57

yabu

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LolaSmiles · 08/06/2020 09:00

Nobody knows for sure what will happen in September. If distancing has to continue then there's only so many ways to fit a whole school's capacity onto site in a safe way.

If you have the funds and there's space at the prep school then it could give you more peace of mind.

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Nihiloxica · 08/06/2020 09:03

I think that’s probably the most unlikely conspiracy theory ever.

I don't think they are conspiring with the Tories.

I think they are making a massive strategic error and playing into the Tories' hands.

Either way, they are opposing universal free education now, so it makes sense to get a proper education for your kids if you can afford it.

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puffinkoala · 08/06/2020 09:06

It looks like the teaching unions are collaborating with the Tories to take this away from most children

Yes it's beginning to look like this is part of DC's grand plan isn't it? Tell schools they can't open normally to provide normal standards of education and then you have a poorly educated population who can't fight back against a rubbish Tory government. So much for wanting a skilled workforce which can nimbly take advantages of the "opportunities" leaving the EU gives us.

And the teaching unions have fallen for it, hook, line and sinker.

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puffinkoala · 08/06/2020 09:08

Agree, not a conspiracy between teaching unions and Tories but playing right into the extreme Tories' hands.

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BirdieDance · 08/06/2020 09:24

Oh my lord. There's some tin hats on this thread. This is a global pandemic in which we have one of the highest rates of death in the world. Where in some parts of the country r is still over 1. No one is "trying" to keep children out of school. They are trying to keep our kids, their teachers and everyone around them relatively safe. Education has always been three way- school, child and parent.

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AmelieTaylor · 08/06/2020 09:27

I tend to think that we will either have all schools back full time or a full blown overwhelming NHS, pandemic on our hands by September. So I'm not sure you'll have much disparity between the hours they're at school.

You know the schools & you know the reasons they're at different schools, so what would you choose for them if both schools were open full time & what would you choose for them if no schools were physically open?

Our private school has been absolutely fabulous since even before lock down with communication, openness, 'live' teaching, feedback, activities etc. Cannot fault them (which makes a change, as I wouldn't have said that before all of this).

Yet the local schools, which friends kids go to, haven't been as good as I expected them to be, given how good they normally are.

You know your kids & the schools, only you can decide what's best, but I think you have to think hard about why they're all where they are in the first place. But move them, even if DS doesn't want to move if you think it's for the best.

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LolaSmiles · 08/06/2020 09:27

puffinkoala
Or alternatively, provide schools with piecemeal information, delay publishing guidance until after press conferences, make guidance in such a way that it won't work in many schools (but don't mention that in the press conference) and then when the profession, unions, local councils come out expressing deep concerns and point out the problems, try to twist the situation into a 'mean teachers and evil unions' narrative in the press.

Divide and rule.

Schools aside, our government's (lack of) strategy seems to be give conflicting or unclear guidance, then blame anyone and everyone for any issues to hide from their own incompetence.

It was blame meanie, lazy teachers over the last few weeks. Yesterday Matt Hancock came out saying that people protesting police brutality would cause a second spike (but not VE day congas, not the impact of Cummings sticking two fingers to the public, not refusing to quarantine international arrivals months ago, and don't forget allowing the Cheltenham Festival to go ahead definitely wouldn't cause Covid to spread).

You're right about it playing into the right's hands though. Some people are incapable of independent thought that they fall for the divide and conquer.

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DarklyDreamingDexter · 08/06/2020 09:38

Don’t just move them because of Covid alone. If they have better academic chances at the prep a school and you can afford it, why not give them all the same opportunities? Your DS is too young to make informed choices about his education.

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dramalamma · 08/06/2020 09:58

thanks all - I get this is a total first world problem and I'm extremely lucky to have a good state and an affordable prep within walking distance!! and you're all very kind not to have pointed that out! :D

The reason they're at different schools to start with is to do with personality and the older two being so close in age that they'd have been in the same classroom (different classes) for most of the first three years at the prep but now they're a little bit older (Y2 and Y3) it wouldn't be as much of an issue. It's also to do with different cut of dates for different parts of the country and having a summer birthday so DD2 couldn't go to the state school for a whole extra year and we made the decision that she'd be better to start. It's also worth saying that they are right next door to each other so logistics isn't a problem. We have considered moving them later on if we felt they needed more pushing (much smaller classes so more individual attention) but the current situation has escalated the decision.
there are advantages to the state school - socially certainly (numbers give choice of friends) and also after school activities being better than the prep just because of the size of the school - they also have a breakfast and after school club which would be a mega loss but I can't make the decision based only on that.
I have to agree with the "conspiracy" people on here tho - it seems massively unfair that some people already are getting more help with homeschooling and I think that's going to just increase the divide in standard of education for these kids if they don't all get full time eduction come September.

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myself2020 · 08/06/2020 10:08

IF the prep is good, I would do it. Prep kids already have on term education that state school
kids don’t have.
If this continues until winter, that makes 2 terms. How much are the parents in your state school willing to do? if tbe majority is engaged and keeps up with the curriculum at home and during the holidays, it wonbe too bad.
But if the majority isn’t engaged, kids will have done nothing for about 6 months by September, potentially longer. and that would mean they actually lost learning (not only failed to gain)

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