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To ask how much childfree time you have per week?

(151 Posts)
MermaidApocalypse Sun 07-Jun-20 18:19:52

Just got back from a day out with DC's. DP stayed home as he works Saturdays and I was going with my parents. I at least expected the hoover to be put round a bit. Nothing. His excuse was that Sunday's are his only child free time apart from when he's at work.
My understanding of most people with small children is that they rarely get any dc free time, apart from work. Who's right? Also if he insists on dc free time, then surely I should too!

OP’s posts: |
Teacaketotty Sun 07-Jun-20 18:23:02

Hmm probably when I’m in the shower, that’s about it!

It’s a touchy subject in our house also!

NiceLegsShameAboutTheFace Sun 07-Jun-20 18:29:44

168 hours a week but .... every form of refuge has its price blush

Gammeldragz Sun 07-Jun-20 18:30:54

At the moment? Unless the time I'm at work, driving or food shopping counts, none!

cleanseTone Sun 07-Jun-20 18:31:01

When my kids are in bed i often go to the cinema with a friend or for a few cokes at the pub or tea in someone's house. In their waking hours i don't get a single minute. My DH used to be great at taking them out but he never does anymore. I'm mentally exhausted

krankykittykat Sun 07-Jun-20 18:33:09

20 hours a week when I'm in work. I did have a few hours every other Saturday night before lockdown and went the bingo

myohmywhatawonderfulday Sun 07-Jun-20 18:33:12

So today I did get some child free time (and dh was out) and I hovered, did all the washing and dusting etc. As I was doing it I thought - if this was DH - it would not even cross his mind.

You are not alone op.

GhostCurry Sun 07-Jun-20 18:33:52

“His excuse was that Sunday's are his only child free time apart from when he's at work... if he insists on dc free time, then surely I should too!“

Genuinely, what did he say to this? Why does he think he has a right to it if you aren’t getting any?

Incidentally, I think it is needed for both parents, I just don’t get why you don’t get any child free time as it is.

Treacletoots Sun 07-Jun-20 18:36:26

About one hour a week at the moment. I'm furloughed and DH is working from home so I'm the primary carer. I really miss work 😭

PrincessHoneysuckle Sun 07-Jun-20 18:37:03

6 hours a day

Stuckforthefourthtime Sun 07-Jun-20 18:38:25

Apparently, the idea is to have equal leisure time. That's a distant dream to most women I know, however...

ComeOnEileen11 Sun 07-Jun-20 18:40:17

When they're asleep. Even the shower and toilet aren't sacrosanct unless I specifically tell DH that he is to keep them with him and let me have a shower in peace.

Smarshian Sun 07-Jun-20 18:41:12

2-3 hours most Sundays when DH takes them out. He plays golf twice a week so this was our agreement for my respite.

Lavenderpurple Sun 07-Jun-20 18:44:11

At the moment no time. And I’m finding it tough.
Dd who is 2 is going through a stage of not going to bed, so no evening to look forward to.
I’m looking forward to being able to return to work.
No weekend help either as dh is renovating our house.

SleepingStandingUp Sun 07-Jun-20 18:44:53

Not even necessarily when I pee. I do the night wakes so that time isn't really mine. DH is wfh, I'm sahp so I do ask the cooking for 5 yo whilst looking after the twin babies.
He did take them out last weekend and I drank wine and coloured in in my book.

With 3kids and lockdown DH only really gets the he's at work or goes to the loo as DS feels less need to follow

OnlyFoolsnMothers Sun 07-Jun-20 18:47:02

When she naps, goes to bed or if her dad takes her somewhere. I can get the odd hr here and there but I mostly utilise it doing chores. A whole day to myself? He’s having a laugh!!!

BertieBotts Sun 07-Jun-20 18:48:15

Um, none. OK, actually, an hour or two in the mornings, then maybe half of the baby's nap depending on whether DS1 leaves me alone. DH and I tend to let one another have naps whenever we want them. I have a rule of no parenting after 8pm unless an emergency for DS1. But actually now I think about it my only child free time at the moment is when I'm asleep. Well that's probably why I'm exhausted.

BertieBotts Sun 07-Jun-20 18:48:50

And I don't have a job so I don't even get time there.

SquigglePigs Sun 07-Jun-20 18:50:09

Mostly just when she is asleep or I'm at work. My DH will take her out of the way for a bit when I'm cooking and we try to give each other an hour or so at the weekend but that's it.

Before lockdown my DP would take her out for a few hours when they came to stay to give us a few hours to herself. We were just building up to the idea of her staying with them for longer.

majesticallyawkward Sun 07-Jun-20 18:50:41

Zero. I can't remember the last time I used the loo alone... or showered, left the house, ate, got dressed, slept or ate alone.

Baby is bf and super clingy plus we cosleep and he won't sleep without me there, older dd follows me around like a little shadow demanding snacks and attention. DH works mon-fri (from home atm, but insists he can't be disturbed!) and then says he's too tired at the weekend, or will take dd out for an hour but not the baby. I do insist then that he does a little more housework if he hasn't got 2 small children attached to him he can put his free hands to good use.

gingerninja99 Sun 07-Jun-20 18:51:14

Currently the 23hrs a week I am work and the 1 hour a week I do the weekly shop sad
I so need a lonesome holiday in a local hotel for a night or two. Just me, room service and massive bed and some books

vampirethriller Sun 07-Jun-20 18:53:03

When she's asleep, although she sleeps in my bed so that's not exactly child free either.

Redwren Sun 07-Jun-20 18:53:15

Mine go down at 7pm, I'm usually awake until 9pm, I do the dishwasher and have a quick tidy and the rest of that time is mine. After that they get up at 6/630 7 days a week. Today I popped to the garden centre for an hour, that was the most I've had since lockdown began when I wasnt working. I've been made redundant now so wont have any free time. I dont mind so much atm as I cant go have a cuppa/takeaway at a friends house or pub tea but I'd be really annoyed if my husband was wanting hours worth of daytime time to himself and I wasnt getting equal. He currently sees his friends once a week in a garden where they take their own chairs and cans of coke/beer but he goes after 7pm

rhowton Sun 07-Jun-20 18:53:34

Kids are in bed by 6:30 every night. I do yoga and social Monday evening 7-10. DH does football and social on Tuesday. He meets with friends on Wednesday 7-10. I play netball and social 6:30-9:30 on Thursday. We have a babysitter every Friday 6:30-11. We see each other Friday, Saturday and Sunday evenings and days! I love time away from the house, especially when I'm alone!

rhowton Sun 07-Jun-20 18:54:22

Also, both kids sleep 12-2 every day so that too!

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