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Toys in parks

(15 Posts)
DartmoorWilderness Fri 05-Jun-20 15:37:03

I’m not sure if I’m being too cautious?

I ventured down to our park with my 2 DC’s with a football to play with.
There was a family:l with toddler age children: they hadn’t brought anything for their kids to do (no judgement!)

We were kicking our ball, the adults watched as their toddlers came over to us, picked up the ball (like right in their faces like toddlers do with balls) and took it back to their parents. Adults did not try to stop this happening.

The adult tried to come over and physically hand me back the ball.
I was polite and asked her to leave it on the ground and we would take it home with us, but didn’t want to touch the ball now they had touched it.

She left it on the ground, but then proceeded to let her children play with it,while also loudly stating how “ridiculous we were, taking it too far” etc.

My husband at home is vulnerable and I don’t want to risk it. I had no hand gel with me either.

I just think that everyone has their own boundaries/personal risk assessment they’ve made regarding social norms now and I clearly stated my expected social norms for this interaction, but felt she tried to shame me for this.

OP’s posts: |
Betty98 Fri 05-Jun-20 21:22:44

I agree with your view that everyone should have their own boundaries at the moment. Some people feel more comfortable, some people are completely terrified. Neither are wrong and everyone should respect each other.

I’d generally feel annoyed if another family started playing with a ball that I’d bought for mine!

Teacher12345 Fri 05-Jun-20 21:26:35

This pisses me off at the best of times. Every time we go swimming some kid has taken their toys and DD wants to play and I explain they are not hers and we don't know whose they are so no.
At the moment I would be even more certain not to let her touch someoe elses toy, especially if they were playing with it!

Stannisbaratheonsboxofmatches Fri 05-Jun-20 21:28:20

They definitely shouldn’t have let the toddlers come over to you in the first place. If nothing else, they could have got a ball in the face by accident!

SaigonSaigon Fri 05-Jun-20 21:34:32

You weren't too cautious. You did nothing wrong. You were unlucky coming into contact with yet another person who couldn't care less about others and their situation.

1066vegan Fri 05-Jun-20 21:35:18

You were absolutely right to be cautious, especially with a vulnerable dh.

I'm a primary school teacher and we had PE this afternoon but were told not to use any equipment because we haven't yet come up with a way to share resources safely. We had 6 different bubbles of children in the playground and field, playing active games and running races while keeping their distance from each other.

Cremebrule Fri 05-Jun-20 21:39:10

She was a twat of the highest order. I wouldn’t let my children take other people’s toys under normal circs but during a pandemic it’s just more than irritating- it’s potentially putting others at risk. You have no idea who might be vulnerable.

DartmoorWilderness Fri 05-Jun-20 21:57:58

Thanks everyone: it is great to get others perspectives: I worry that with my academic background in infectious diseases and being a bit of a hyperchondriac to boot - I might have been over thinking things 😂

OP’s posts: |
AnnaNimmity Fri 05-Jun-20 22:18:43

she really wasn't a "twat of the highest order". what a ridiculous thing to say. She probably just didn't think - it's just a ball.

DartmoorWilderness Fri 05-Jun-20 23:04:35

I agree she may not have been “thinking”, but I don’t agree with the “it’s just a ball” in terms of the science of disease transmission via hard surfaces. Also I don’t think not thinking it through gives her the right to project her morals onto my boundaries (e.g. the “I’m being ridiculous” comments)

OP’s posts: |
Cremebrule Sat 06-Jun-20 06:38:49

AnnaNimmity Well obviously there are worse things she could have done but I think it is a sign of selfishness and she should be thinking at the moment. Some parents are annoying and she sounds like one of them.

VashtaNerada Sat 06-Jun-20 06:46:04

They were totally in the wrong! I’m relatively laid back personally (pretty sure we already had the virus early on when it went through our school in mid-March) but I’m still taking sensible precautions and I fully understand that other people are in a different situation to me. It was an incredibly thoughtless thing to do and put you in a really difficult position. “Twat of the highest order” sounds about right to me!

SpillTheTeaa Sat 06-Jun-20 06:50:35

Couldn't say I wouldn't take a run up with the ball and boot it at her 🤷🏻‍♀️

GrumpyHoonMain Sat 06-Jun-20 07:22:33

Situations like this are probably why Wuhan banned children from coming out of their houses. Parents unwilling to parent are frustrating at the best of times but could basically end up becoming murderers in this epidemic by not controlling who their kids come up to.

SnuggyBuggy Sat 06-Jun-20 07:25:21

Thus puts me off letting mine take toys out. Some other parents are really enitltled to other kids toys, they also tend to be the ones that crap on about sharing.

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