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AIBU?

AIBU or is lockdown with 20 month old hell?

105 replies

Anewmum2018 · 04/06/2020 16:39

Bear with me... I just need reassurance.... people with toddlers are finding this hell right? It’s not just me being a crappy mum?
No parks, playgroups, soft play. I LITERALLY am out of my mind with boredom and feel so guilty that I’m not enjoying my kid more! Is this normal?

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Am I being unreasonable?

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Pleatherandlace · 04/06/2020 16:42

20 months = really boring stage. Cute yes, but no meaningful conversation and not able to do anything particularly interesting. Also mine all dropped their naps around this stage so had to entertain them all day too. (Hope yours is still napping).

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Distiller91 · 04/06/2020 16:44

I'm with ya. With a 2.8 year old. We do the same walks everyday because there is nothing else to do. No nursery or playgroups which usually take up half the week. Every time we pass the local playground my DS has a breakdown as I explain to him that it is closed for the 80th day in a row. It's bloody hard isn't it.

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Anewmum2018 · 04/06/2020 16:46

Phew... i find it so bloody hard. I’m normally really busy with him doing stuff, but this is next level boring. We don’t even have enough housework to do ‘together’, and his attention span is about 40 seconds long so have to think of a gazillion different things to play. Inevitably, CBeebies goes on and I spend a lot of the day staring at the traffic out the window. I need it to end now!

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Bubblesbubblesmybubbles · 04/06/2020 16:47

Yup especially with a newborn in the mix too Confused

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fedupandlookingforchange · 04/06/2020 16:48

Its really hard, mines 2.5 years. I had a a whole summer of interesting local places to visit planned.
We don't walk past the park anymore and sometimes the bath happens in the middle of the day just for change.

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Babyboomtastic · 04/06/2020 16:49

I have one a bit older than that, and one a bit younger. You're not wrong...

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Curlyhairedbrummie · 04/06/2020 16:49

It's just horrific isn't it. I can't quite believe how much I'm looking forward to soft play opening!

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Randomnessembraced · 04/06/2020 16:50

www.eyfshome.com/todaysactivities

  • we use this website just to give some structure! Some stuff could work for 2 year olds.
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CornishYarg · 04/06/2020 16:51

YANBU, it's a tough age when all the usual distractions are available. During lockdown, it must be incredibly difficult.

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Rumblebear · 04/06/2020 16:53

3 year old and 15 month old. I’ve run out of ideas and will now. Nursery starts week after next and not too soon for this house!

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Anewmum2018 · 04/06/2020 16:54

Thanks for the reassurance. Struggling to know how to fill each and every day, and bedtime is always such a relief. Feel very guilty to admit that though, but I’m just not much of a home bird...

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Marlena1 · 04/06/2020 16:59

YADNBU!! Mine takes over an hour to get to sleep too so can't even look forward to that. Plus she's dropping her nap :(

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Littlepoppet1 · 04/06/2020 17:01

YANBU, I have a 18 MO and also finding it hell. Could have written your post myself! I am furloughed but due back at work in a couple of weeks so she’ll be going back to nursery 2 days a week then. Can’t come quick enough!!

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Stannisbaratheonsboxofmatches · 04/06/2020 17:04

God it must be hell.

Has been hard enough with a 6 yo!

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mantpo · 04/06/2020 17:07

DD is 24 months and we were going to toddler classes, stay and play or soft play every day before lockdown. I had a nice routine of classes and it used to fill the day, with mealtimes and 1-2 hour nap filling the rest. I just can't get on with home activities, I get stressed with all the setting up and tidying up, and when I've tried to organise something DD just loses interest and wanders off to do something else like empty the laundry basket. No garden so hard to do messy activities.

We do different walks every day because I would be bored to tears going to the same place every day. I've expanded my 'walking distance' area by about 4x (with DD in the buggy). DD enjoys going to gardens and luckily doesn't get too upset about not going to playgrounds - she still finds it exciting to do things like climb up slopes and a flight of steps, and collect sticks. I quite like discovering small garden squares that I've never been to before, plus we've found some interesting open areas which have loads of space to run around and explore (usually full of office workers as we are near the City of London, but we often have it all to ourselves). We're usually out of the house from 9.30am to 3pm as I'd find it frustrating to be stuck at home all day.

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Neverendingweeds · 04/06/2020 17:10

Yeah.... I have a (just) turned 3 year old and a 4.5 month old baby. It's bloody awful.

This is not how I imagined my maternity leave to be!! No days out, no soft play, nothing.

Pre-school hasn't reopened and may not until September so our 3 year old is bored as there is only so much we can do to keep her entertained whilst looking after our baby.

I am fed up with it all now.

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PumpkinP · 04/06/2020 17:12

Yes!! I have a just turned 3 year old and it’s hell. No parks and I have 3 older ones who don’t like going for a walk. We don’t really go out at all now but I feel bad but mine just wouldn’t go for a walk.

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HenSolo · 04/06/2020 17:13

Mine are older but when they were that age I was totally out of my mind with boredom and that was without lockdown and being able to go to softplays, playgrounds etc. My friend has a 20 month old and she is really losing it.
You are not a bad mum, it is a rubbish age for this to be happening

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flingo · 04/06/2020 17:13

Just joining in the general misery. My 3 year old is bored and difficult. The more tired and drained I feel the more she acts out her frustration and it's not good. It actually wouldn't matter if I was Mary Poppins. She needs input from people who aren't her parents and she needs interaction with other children. This is a wholly unnatural state of affairs and it's no wonder we are all struggling.

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deste · 04/06/2020 17:23

21month old DGD, she is speaking so she is quite interesting but I know it’s hard for my daughter. She does nap for a couple of hours at about 11 but she is up at about 6.45. Today she had play dough, pushing shapes into it, drawing and watching a Disney film. Earlier on she was playing with her dolls and prom. She was also taken on a walk to see the sheep down the road. My DD is working from home and also had two step children to homeschool so it is hard. After lunch I’m not sure what she did but the other children can entertain her. This time next year it will all be different.

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zoemum2006 · 04/06/2020 17:36

My kids are older (9 and 13) but I have said on multiple occasions 'thank god this didn't happen when they were little because I would have lost my freaking mind'.


Getting out and about/ meeting up/ clubs etc. is essential at that age for a mum's survival.

I feel for you, I really do.

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BogRollBOGOF · 04/06/2020 17:36

My sympathies!

I was pregnant when DS1 was about that age. He was a tough toddler. It was a long, tough winter with umpteen flurries of snow and I spent 6 months riddled with SPD (including postnatally) which really compromised what I could do with him. We reached the level where all I could manage of mutal interest was to hobble on crutches from a parent space to the supermarket cafe.

This time shall pass (slowly, tediously). Entertainment opportunities will open back up. Toddlers do develop more skills and a sense of reason... eventually.

My friends with toddlers have found the last couple of months tough.

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Pebblexox · 04/06/2020 17:44

I'm the opposite really. I have a 17 month old, and honestly I've loved this time with her. Don't get me wrong, there are moments that I would love to send her off to a family members or have 5 minutes of peace, but in the grand scheme of things I've found I'm spending more time actually playing with and just spending quality time together, whereas before we were out and about all the time, seeing people, doing things, constantly busy. This time has been like a little bubble for us, and I think I'll be a little sad when it's over.

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riotlady · 04/06/2020 17:54

YANBU, there’s only so many times I can get the playdo out or run races in the garden.

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UnspeakableBode · 04/06/2020 17:55

My little boy is 20 month too, so many tantrums because he cant articulate what he wants. Im panicking with change in weather because we spend most ofnour time in the garden or park. My husband is a keyworker and has had to go back to work so he's at nursery 2 days a week and Im so relieved that he is getting interaction from someone other than me and his dad. I think its totally normal. Any other time Id love extended time off but tryo g to

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