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AIBU?

Can I have a handhold please

110 replies

GruffBelow · 04/06/2020 09:39

I know in the grand scheme of things going on in the world right now, this seems minor. But, we have to have our dog put down in an hour and it’s just tipped me over the edge.

2020 has been a bad year for many of us. It started off with a late miscarriage at the end of January for me. I was 20 weeks. Then all the Covid stuff happened and I lost two close relatives in the space of a few weeks, in May. One was elderly but the other one was in her 50s with no underlying conditions, so that was a massive shock. Now this.

I know it’s been coming, he was a large breed and almost 13 so he had a good innings. I don’t know why but this has hit me even harder than everything else. I don’t know if it’s just the straw that broke the camels back. He was honestly the best dog and my best friend really. I work in a very dog friendly place so he came into work with me every day and was nearly always with me. Every day for almost 13 years. He went on holidays with us, was there when I had all the dc, he even pre-dates dh!

I just feel like giving up today. I’m going to miss him so much. The dc are devastated and been crying all morning. They’re all primary age and don’t really understand why he won’t be back. To make things worse because of covid, we can’t go into the vet so I can’t even stay with him. I have to leave him outside.

It’s just shit. Everything’s just so shit right now

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

126 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
2%
You are NOT being unreasonable
98%
MatildaTheCat · 04/06/2020 09:41

I’m so very sorry. It may be too late for you to change your plan but is there any chance of getting a mobile vet to your house? Possibly even worse with children though.

It’s crap and yes, devastating. Sending you strength and love.

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Luckypoppy · 04/06/2020 09:43

I'll hold your hand all the way. It's devastating losing a pet. You are making the kindest decision. X

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Luckypoppy · 04/06/2020 09:44

Are you sure you can't go inside? My sister had her dog pts 3 weeks ago and they allowed her inside. She didn't think she would be allowed but she was. X

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YouDirtyMare · 04/06/2020 09:44

I'm so sorry, it's the hardest thing to do but it's the last act of love and kindness you can give them, a dignified ending

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justkeepmovingon · 04/06/2020 09:45

No that's just awful for you can't you go in? Wear PPE get the vet to come to you there must be a solution.

I'm 100% with you we had to have our old boy put to sleep at 13 he was our whole life like an end of an era and I really want to send you massive hugs xxx

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YouDirtyMare · 04/06/2020 09:46

Meant to add, ask the vet to come to the car x

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Grandmi · 04/06/2020 09:49

Oh bless your heart . I am so sorry for the horrific year you have had so far . I really will be thinking of you today and I can honestly say it is the bravest and kindest decision you can make for your beautiful doggie. I had to make that decision last August and it was so sad but the best decision for my beautiful dog . Try not to be too brave today...a good cry really does help if the tears come . 💐💐

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Wynston · 04/06/2020 09:51

Op i am so very sorry......its heartbreaking and just wanted to say handhold here......xxx

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Grandmi · 04/06/2020 09:52

Sorry missed that you cannot be with him...that is awful. Ask vet to come to your car or cancel and find a mobile vet or ask vet to use PPE .💕💐💕

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Nottherealslimshady · 04/06/2020 09:54

Aw your poor boy, I couldn't bear not being with my girl while being pts. I cant believe they'd make you leave him outside that's so awful.

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GruffBelow · 04/06/2020 09:56

Thank you so much everyone.

I did call around quite a few vets in the area, this is the only one who could see us in an emergency as he massively deteriorated overnight. They said they won’t let us in due to covid, that was non negotiable. We are in a covid hotspot area, we have had above average deaths here, so that may have something to do with it.

He’s so weak now anyway he’s barely keeping his eyes open and couldn’t even get up to wee, poor boy. I’m not sure if he’ll even notice I’m not there I will though.

OP posts:
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ineedaholidaynow · 04/06/2020 10:01

I am so sorry OP, sending a hand hold and hugs Flowers

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Crunchymum · 04/06/2020 10:01

You have had a rotten year haven't you? I say that with the greatest sincerity. A close family member lost their first baby at 19w back in February and it has hit them awfully hard. I hope you have been offered support with regards to this?

My old pet is a kitty and I'd try and explore all options so I could be with her, when her time comes BUT if you really cannot be with your dog then do not feel guilty. You gave him a wonderful life, you love him very much and he will be at peace soon (which is the final act of love you can show him, even if it feels like the worst thing to do!)

Take comfort in you children, have lots of hugs, they'll never forget your DDog either Flowers

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AllTheUserNamesAreTaken · 04/06/2020 10:01

Oh Gruff, I’m so sorry. It is heartbreaking And doubly so because you cannot be with him. You are doing the very best for your beloved friend. Flowers

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SorryImNotCreative · 04/06/2020 10:03

Heartbreaking Flowers

I hope you can take some comfort in knowing that you gave him the best possible life a dog could have. Lots of love, lots of fun holidays and lots of time with you.

There’s no getting around it. You’ve had a shit year OP, and it’s ok to feel sad and have a good cry. I hope that after this, things improve for you.

Thinking of you, your family and your lovely old boy.

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WonderfullyaMummy · 04/06/2020 10:03

Ask if they'll take a phone in so you can talk to him at the end.

I did that with my previous cat - was 600 miles away when she had to be put down. I think it comforted us both that she could hear me as she went to sleep.

Hugsxxx

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Pebblexox · 04/06/2020 10:03

I am so sorry! Our little fur friends are forever a part of our lives, and it's so hard to say goodbye when that time comes. Sending you so much love and strength Thanks❤️

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Crunchymum · 04/06/2020 10:04

@GruffBelow I see that being with your dog isn't an option so I revert to my other point

do not feel guilty. You gave him a wonderful life, you love him very much and he will be at peace soon (which is the final act of love you can show him, even if it feels like the worst thing to do!)

He'll go knowing how loved he is what a huge part of your life and family he has been.

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Roselilly36 · 04/06/2020 10:06

Handhold OP Flowers

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Fluffycloudland77 · 04/06/2020 10:07

The vet will be very kind to him. I’m sorry, losing pets is brutal.

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percheron67 · 04/06/2020 10:14

So sorry. My thoughts and prayers are with you and him. xx

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allflownthenest · 04/06/2020 10:15

Sad FlowersFlowersFlowersFlowers

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GreyhoundzRool · 04/06/2020 10:16

I’m so sorry. Thinking of you

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Ilikewinter · 04/06/2020 10:16

Im crying for you, loosing a pet is absolutely heartbreaking even though we all know it will happen one day. Just know that you are making the best decision for him and thats so much kinder than leaving him in pain.
Love to your family today 😥

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Passthewinebottle · 04/06/2020 10:17

I'm so sorry OP. Sending lots of gentle hugs. When my dog was PTS, it was like losing a family member, and its just even worse at the moment. Go easy on yourself, it has been a truly shitty year xxxxxxxxxx

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