Breastfeeding and nursery starting at a distance

[Holdmysandwichplease]

First off an apology, I wasn't really sure where to put so sorry if it's not quite the right place 🤔

Background - I'm about to go back to work next month after a years maternity. My baby is now just turned 1 (12 months maternity plus annual leave so I've had a brilliant chunk of time off!) and so eats solids etc. However I do still breastfeed. Usually we have about 2-3 feeds during the day before nap times and a feed before bed. Sometimes the occasional night feed but otherwise he sleeps through 🙌.

Nursery have spoken to me today about visits starting in a couple of weeks, however we won't be able to go and stay with him for his first visit as planned. Due to social distancing we must now drop him at the door and go :-( I'm feeling very sad about this and hope he will be okay. I understand it's the norm now and why it must be done but I am also aware he doesn't know this place/ these people ! It seems so harsh and cold to just hand him over especially when he has only been with myself and my husband for the last 8 weeks :-( Please some reassurance would be great.

I'm also worried about how feasible it is to continue breastfeeding. I love feeding him and would like to continue for as long as I think it is beneficial. However is it going to be an issue that I can no longer feed him during the day? He has never taken a bottle but can drink happily out of a cup if I express (I've only ever done this once or twice).

Any experience or advice would be fab, thank you

(I guess my AIBUs would be - AIBU to think I can continue bf? My family think I won't be able to. And AIBU to be worried about how dropping and running so to speak will affect my baby!)

[NorthernBirdAtHeart]

Yes you can, I did, although it dropped to just morning, bedtime and occasional night feed. Pump when you can, both for spare milk (to freeze) and to keep your supply going.

It seems harsh to handover your little precious bundle and not have settling in sessions, but baby will be fine. It’s amazing how quickly they get used to a new environment, and nurseries are so stimulating, he’ll have a whale of a time. Actually I used to find it harder taking mine in to the nursery rather than just a quick hand over.

Good luck with going back to work OP, I’m sure your LO will be fine

[Pipandmum]

Just reduce it to morning and evening. Express in the middle if you need to.
Will his first day be just a couple hours or so? I don't remember what it was for my kids but I don't remember staying with them - that rather defeats the purpose?
The nursery are used to this and will have worked out the best way for settling him in.

[Holdmysandwichplease]

Thank you for the responses :-) any idea how I start to wean him off during the day ? Do I just gradually reduce his day time feeds ? I considered sending him with a cup of milk at first but not sure if I'm overthinking!

Originally the idea was that his first visit we would go with him and stay to play for an hour then do paperwork in the office for half an hour. Second visit stay 15 mins then leave for an hour. Third visit stay 15 and leave for half day. Now though it will all be dropping at door and go, first visit will be an hour. I guess I'm just hyper aware he is very clingy to me (especially after isolation, before this we went to lots of groups and constantly socialised!). Luckily his dad will still be off for a bit longer so he will be able to gradually ease into the full day at nursery.

[dinodiva]

My DS started nursery when he was 9 months and I continued to BF until he decided to quit when he was 1. I was feeding morning/evening/overnight and expressed at work every lunchtime which he would then have the following day at nursery. It was fine, other than the hassle of having to do it! I think after a while I was expressing less so
I cut it out. I found by that point though the supply was much more adaptable - if he wanted it, it was there and if he didn’t, it wasn’t uncomfortable to have longer between feeds!

[Soon2BeMumof3]

I returned to work around the same age with my first. I just fed as normal on the days we were together. On the days I worked I fed in the morning, when I arrived home and then again before bed, so at least 3 feeds a day. It was slightly uncomfortable the first few days at work but not so much that I needed to pump.

[mocktail]

Mine started nursery at a similar age. During the day they had cow's milk from a Tommy Tippee cup, but I bf morning and bedtime (and night feeds if needed). It worked fine and didn't seem to affect my supply

[mocktail]

Oops that was supposed to be a happy emoji not a sad one!

[Wavingnotdrown1ng]

I went back to work full- time at 7 months and breast-fed until 14m. I fed morning and night Mon- Fri and three times a day at weekends. Dc was in nursery f/t from 7m and had formula there and after a year, cows’ milk with food. I also had a child that refused to feed from a bottle from me or my partner but eventually did from MIL when I wasn’t there after 6m and from nursery staff. With regard to you, as my HV put it, you can ‘ train your breasts’ to do what you need them to do and what you want. You have the right to pump in hygienic conditions at work but I didn’t do this, as I am a teacher and knew I wasn’t going to make it work with the timetable I had and the walk to the room and the fridge and back when I had back to back lessons. I did find that my baby wouldn’t take a bottle from me - DC could probably smell my milk! At the time I was very worried about it but nursery staff have a lot of experience with this and the stress isn’t rolling off them in waves when they feed with a bottle - unlike me, who was the main breadwinner and frantic about getting back to work ( Mat leave 6m In those days). It will be ok - but I well remember the stress and upset at the time.

[MoonBaby1]

My youngest has been in nursery since he was about 15m and apart from a quick comfort feed at drop off he’s been fine and actually eats more food there than at home!

He’s two now and it hasn’t affected my supply at all.

I never had to go in to feed him at all.

Good luck. We’re so far off nursery restarting here.