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To think working from home and looking after//home schooling kids is unsustainable until sept!

(236 Posts)
heh1 Mon 01-Jun-20 19:30:16

Had enough. Dh and I both in pressured busy jobs. Dc in non returning year group

We are surviving by sticking them in front of screens all day when we are on con calls

Don't want to ask for furlough as then my colleagues without dcs or who have much older dcs will get my work ( client focussed sector) and I might be made redundant

Feel pretty rubbish..

House is a shit tip..
Dcs craving attention and largely ignored
Work carrying on like business as usual

Can't manage this until Sept

GPs too far away and in vulnerable category so can't help

OP’s posts: |
audweb Mon 01-Jun-20 19:33:24

I think we just have to suck it up. There’s not much choice is there? I feel your pain solo parenting it here, her dad has maybe had her four nights since March and I’m working full time from home. No family near by. It’s exhausting and tough, but on the plus side we got to this point so we can do it for a while longer.

GreyishDays Mon 01-Jun-20 19:34:08

Although there won’t be homeschooling for the last six weeks.

mum2jakie Mon 01-Jun-20 19:35:21

I've had the same thoughts today. This is completely unsustainable and I am pissed off with it all now!

pinkpixie83 Mon 01-Jun-20 19:36:55

Completely with you. Single mum, working from the dining room table, three kids of various ages... they are getting closer and closer to feral

FudgeBrownie2019 Mon 01-Jun-20 19:37:10

I don't see it that we have a choice. DH and I both during usual times WFH 50% of our time but then travel the other 50% at opposite times so that one of us is always home with the DC. We've never spent so much time together, we've had to learn how to do our calls at opposite times whilst we work from home during lockdown.

Realistically, though, neither DC is likely to return to school and I've reached the point where I've just accepted that they're home til September. Hating it isn't going to change it one bit.

SomeoneElseEntirelyNow Mon 01-Jun-20 19:38:31

Can you get a childminder? I know lots of them near us are back at work.

MsMeNz Mon 01-Jun-20 19:44:46

We can do this! I know it's not ideal. I just try an do that horrible think of thinking of all the people in the world so much less well off than me and what other woman have to our up with and tell myself to suck it up princess as I'm so lucky compared to many. this too shall pass and all that.

Sorry if that sounds too polly-anna ish!

Haribolover Mon 01-Jun-20 19:46:24

Exactly the same situation here and we get nearer and nearer breaking point each day. Home schooling is minimal as she is hating it and not motivated even though she's bright. Younger one is just a whirlwind who needs structure of nursery. We are in Scotland so minimum another month before any hope of nursery.

Only positive is each day we are one day closer to then being back.

Resenting more and more key workers having access to schools, wrap around and holiday care while others are trying to do everything and failing at everything. Not helped by key workers near us with kids in e dry day going off shopping, doing the garden, etc

TiddleTaddleTat Mon 01-Jun-20 19:46:44

Absolutely with you, OP. It's unsustainable. Undoubtedly it will be the mothers that bear the burden and it may set a lot of us back as people decide to accept furlough or reduce hours as a way to cope with it.

MargeryB Mon 01-Jun-20 19:51:47

Me too OP. Had last week off and the contrast with today is awful. Am a keyworker but haven't sent back to school as school have made it look horrible. I don't want handwashing that much per day. She has eczema and her skin will disintegrate.

whittingtonmum Mon 01-Jun-20 19:51:56

Agree with you. DH and I are in the same position as you and it is utterly exhausting.
Our kids are not exactly as well cared for as I would like - let alone properly home schooled. I think I might leave my job soon as there isn't enough flexibility to deal with the situation and I am utterly exhausted. I really never thought I would get so low but here I am....

Time2change2 Mon 01-Jun-20 19:57:39

It is completely crap. Whilst I hear other mums say ‘lockdown has been great, a really chance to slow down and reflect’ bloody hell really? Because with 3 kids and working from home I have never been busier, felt more guilty, ignored my kids and got so little sleep. School work is slowly going out the window in favour of them running round the house all day trying to amuse themselves and my and DH coming out and shouting to be quiet whilst we both try to work. It’s bloody awful

pandarific Mon 01-Jun-20 20:02:48

Second the childminder idea - ours is taking school age children. Look for one, what's the worst that could happen?

Chicchicchicchiclana Mon 01-Jun-20 20:07:01

Yanbu OP.

School isn't childcare but it gives people with children a number of fairly predictable hours per week to be able to work without other enormous responsibilities.

I think non key worker parents of under 16 year olds who haven't been furloughed are in a terrible position.

And still we have blinkered people wittering on about how lovely it all is, baking, gardening, relaxing!

thirstyformore Mon 01-Jun-20 20:11:07

Yep. It's awful. I hated today. Had a few days off last week for half term and the contrast today was stark. Two parents working full time and two primary aged children to homeschool. It's really hard.

GoldenOmber Mon 01-Jun-20 20:37:51

YANBU at all, it's awful. And I'm in Scotland where even when they go back in August it's part-time 'blended learning'. Can't get furloughed because public sector, can't drop hours because work manically busy, can't get keyworker childcare because you're not allowed it here unless you can't work from home, have a toddler as well as school-aged DC, it's just impossible. Have mostly given up on home schooling by now. Feel like a rubbish employee and a rubbish parent too.

31Daisy Mon 01-Jun-20 20:48:42

Starting this week I will now be paying a babysitter for a few hours each day for my 7 year old. She’s year 11 so no school work and wants to earn some money.

Lovelydovey Mon 01-Jun-20 20:50:34

Yep mine are practically feral. Was in tears today over the thought that this could be my life until September or beyond if they don’t return full time.

Dk20 Mon 01-Jun-20 20:55:01

I have been off work since last Wednesday- I took a few holidays. I'm due to start wfh again tomorrow with the kids here and am absolutely dreading it. I really dont want to do it.
I'm under so much pressure and I feel like the kids are being neglected.
I have a 6yo with autism and an almost 1 year old, i just feel like an absolutely terrible mother.

ChocolateCard Mon 01-Jun-20 20:56:37

Driving us to an early grave, too.

Two full time signing parents, and two school age kids.

Meanwhile, both kids teachers are posting on Facebook how much they are enjoying the break, and sitting in their gardens angry

ChocolateCard Mon 01-Jun-20 20:57:11


PlanetSlattern Mon 01-Jun-20 21:00:18

It's awful. One of mine is going back, but not until later in June and then only two days a week. What I don't understand is what will have changed between now and September? Will they still be part-time then? It makes me want to cry. They are not receiving an education and are mostly ignored all day. I don't know what else to do, I have to keep working.

Dylaninthemovies1 Mon 01-Jun-20 21:01:35

Yip, I hear you! We try to work in shifts but often have to still attend calls when it’s our turn looking after our son. Feel so sad watching him slumped in front of the telly when I’m on a call

SunbathingDragon Mon 01-Jun-20 21:01:53

You will have to find a way of making just work. I don’t think you can rely on schools being open and things being normal in September either.

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