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We don’t men just look after their own children

(7 Posts)
Noti23 Sun 31-May-20 23:47:31

For being sick of people ridiculing step-mothers for not taking on the work of useless fathers? We all know about these posts. Nevertheless, how many step-fathers are expected to take on the full parenting roll for the well-being of the child when mothers fall foul? I think it’s horrible misogyny that encourages men not to care for their own children, whether single parents or not.

And no, I’m not a step-mother but I do have one (one that successfully encouraged my dad not to see me as a child).

OP’s posts: |
DesignedForLife Sun 31-May-20 23:49:46

There are many men who are fantastic fathers. Don’t tar them all with the same brush.

But otherwise, yes step mothers shouldn’t make up the shortcomings of rubbish fathers.

felineflutter Sun 31-May-20 23:50:42

YANBU nothing much has changed in 40 years.

Noti23 Sun 31-May-20 23:53:46

@DesignedForLife I’m not talking about fantastic fathers.

I’m talking bout posts on here from step-mums that describe fathers who don’t look after their kids properly and the step-mums are the ones who get the blame!!

OP’s posts: |
KylieKoKo Sun 31-May-20 23:56:53

Yanbu!

There are at least two current threads at the moment where step mothers are being called selfish for not wanting to take on parenting the child's father refuses to do. On the other hand I was once called controlling weird and over invested for putting some sanitary towels in the bathroom for DPs daughter just in case when she started to show signs of puberty. We can't win.

highmarkingsnowbile Mon 01-Jun-20 00:07:18

Why it's so common that women are advised to run like the wind from men who have kids already, particularly when they have none themselves. It's almost always a 'DP' who's handily found a replacement skivvy/nanny. The threads on here are legion. He usually has some job that's just oh-so-important her indoors just has to pick up the parenting
he never did in the first place.

mylittlesandwich Mon 01-Jun-20 00:21:02

I would say that from a Childs point of view a helpful step parent is better than none. In my own experience neither my father or his partner could parent. I looked after my sister until she was old enough to not want to visit too.

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